Total Pokkemon Action
by Shuckle Master
Summary: Victini's back, with a bigger budget this time! Thirty seven Pokemon compete for a million bucks, this time in a film lot. Double the drama, double the comedy, double...everything. It's season 2, baby!
1. Chapter 1: Pilot

**Hey guys, a little bit earlier then I planned, but I wanted to kick off Summer with a bang.**

 **Season Two is here! I don't want to spend too much time writing this note, but there will be a few changes.**

 **Probably most important to announce is the first instance of aftermath episodes in my series. After every five eliminations there will be a special that gives fans a chance to ask eliminated contestants' questions. Each aftermath will also be a crossover with a tpi writer, so get hyped for some shenanigans!**

 **Diamond Toxic: Hey everyone, it's Diamond Toxic/ Fire Slash here and welcome to the newest addition of our TPI series. I was supposed to have helped Shuckle with his story, but some personal stuff came up that made it hard for me to even focus on my old stories. But, I'm back now and excited to be here. If you like our series, I'd totally recommend that you read the spin-off, TPI Gliscor's Redemption. To put it simply, Gliscor travels back in time to when the contest first happens. Anyways, hope you all enjoy Total Pokkemon Action.**

 **That's all for now, so I hope you guys enjoy!**

0000

A cream-colored fox smiled at the camera facing him, making a victory pose with his fingers. "Howdy folks, and welcome to Total Pokkemon Action! If you're new, welcome, and if you've seen this song and dance before, welcome back!"

He stood with his back to what appeared to be a film lot, and the camera slowly turned to showcase the many sets and trailers. Many Pokemon were hard at work, preparing the lot for what appeared to be a monster movie. The fox grinned.

"It's a lot fancier than a crappy old island, eh?" Victini said. "Welcome to Season Two of the Total Pokkemon franchise. I'm your host Victini, ready to throw down another few months of quality reality TV show entertainment."

"Hah," came a gruff, Russian voice from a limousine a few feet away from Victini. The window rolled down, revealing the face of Hariyama, Victini's partner in crime, wearing a pair of shades.

"Quality entertainment and reality TV show do not work well in same sentence, yes?" Hariyama chuckled. "Young Victini is kidding himself."

"Ixnay on the criticism!" Victini hissed. "Venusaur's docking my pay every time the show is panned in any way, shape, or form. Apparently, he blames any of the show's flaws on me personally."

"Well, you _are_ host," Hariyama said, folding his arms. "Perhaps he has point."

"Yeah, I'm the host, and that means I outrank you and therefore can get you fired," Victini hissed. He blinked a few times, realizing that the cameras were still rolling. He turned back to them with an awkward grin.

"To uh…go into the show's lore, Total Pokkemon Island was a low budget reality show starring thirty-six competitors," Victini said, reading through some note cards he had made.

"Thirty-seven!" Hariyama barked.

"Hariyama, roll that window up now!" Victini growled. When the fighting type acquiesced, his wide but fake grin returned. "Anyway, after thirty-five Pokemon were eliminated via being voted off, only two competitors remained and fought in a vicious final battle. Last season, it was Umbreon, the edgy loner, who took home the gold. This time, we have an all new cast, and some new rules and gimmicks to hook you guys in!"

He took a glance at his watch. "It looks like it will be a while before the cast arrives, so let's check the cameras on the bus they're taking here. See ya soon!"

 **0000**

"What'cha reading?" Weavile asked the Pokemon sitting next to him; a Sawk. The fighting type was leafing through a book, and he didn't make much effort in trying to engage in conversation.

"You don't know this one?" Sawk asked, looking up and raising an eyebrow. "It's a novel on tactics and manipulation in a Reality TV show's setting, written by two contestants from last season of the show we're competing in. I'm brushing up on some of the skills used by the professionals."

"Huh," Weavile said with a whistle. "You're really dedicated to winning this then?"

"Of course," Sawk said. "I could use the money. I suggest you read it too if you wish a stand a chance in making the merge."

Weavile nodded. "Does it have any pictures?"

"No, of course not," Sawk said, narrowing his eyes.

"Then I'm not too interested," Weavile said, leaning against the back of his seat. Sawk rolled his eyes and went back to reading.

He wasn't the one on the bus reading that particular book. Magmar's gaze was fixed on the novel as though his life depended on it, and Crobat was perusing it from where he clung to the ceiling. Unlike Magmar though, he didn't look very impressed by it.

"Hey, do you know that guy?" Emolga asked, whispering to Mawile. The two had gotten to know each other quickly and made friends on their long bus ride. "He looks kinda familiar."

"Well, he's a Crobat, girl," Mawile said with a snicker, bopping Emolga on the head. "They all share the same features."

"Funny you should say that, Emolga," came a voice behind them. Emolga and Mawile both gasped and wheeled around, turning to face Ariados, who was staring at them.

"Jesus, Ariados, why do you have to sneak up on us like that?" Mawile asked. "You almost gave me a heart attack!"

"Your reactions are so funny though," Ariados said with a giggle. "I couldn't help myself."

"So, what were you saying?" Emolga asked. "You know this Crobat guy?"

"Yeah, apparently, he's been in a few of these reality tv show competitions," Ariados explained. "He didn't rank particularly high on them, but he's known for his mean streak and grasp of tactics. Keep an eye out for him."

"He's cute though," Emolga remarked.

"She took nothing from what you said," Mawile chuckled, nudging Ariados. "I've known Emolga for an hour and a half and I already know it's in one ear and out the other with her."

The other Pokemon had spent their ride on the bus breaking the ice, making polite small-talk with one another to get to know the competition. Komala was snoozing in his chair next to an awkward looking Feebas in her fish bowl, each bump on the road causing the poor fish to nearly spill out. A few Pokemon were giving odd, furtive looks to Samurott, who was sitting quietly by himself, pointing out his odd battle scars. Samurott did his best to ignore them but couldn't help letting out a sad sigh.

"You have my pity," Gengar said next to him, patting his shoulder. "No offense intended, but I'm sure you get that a lot?"

Samurott nodded, looking downcast.

"It's unfortunate, but it's how we are," Gengar said. "Every bee will be judged for their stingers, even though said stingers prove nothing but their innocence."

Samurott gave Gengar a grateful look. He bowed his thanks at the ghost's understanding.

Gengar gave Samurott a kind smile. "I'm sure they just need a chance to get to know you."

"He'll definitely be a threat," Magmar grumbled, writing down Samurott's name into a notebook. "He's already being ostracized, so it won't be too hard to convince people to vote him off."

"Hey, can you quit your scheming while I'm trying to nap?" Growlithe barked. "It's rude."

"Can you quit trying to nap while I'm scheming?" Magmar shot back. "It's rude."

"That really doesn't make any sense, Magmar," Flygon said from the seat behind them.

"Your face doesn't make any sense!" Magmar spat.

Next to Flygon, Mimikyu was also scribbling down something in her notebook labeled 'Hit list'. Flygon glanced at her.

"Uh…how are you doing Mimikyu? What's that you're writing?" Flygon asked, feeling like he would regret answering.

Slowly, Mimikyu spun her head one hundred and eighty degrees to stare pointedly at the dragon type. "You don't want to know."

"Y-you're right, I probably don't!" Flygon said with a weak laugh. "Glad we're on the same page."

"It's too late," Mimikyu hissed. "Change seats right now."

"Y-yes ma'am!" Flygon said. "Uh…Castform, can I switch with you?"

"No," Castform said, using the mechanical hands he had attached to his body to shake a strange vial. "And its _Doctor_ Castform, so refer to me as such!"

"Wait really?" Flygon asked in surprise. "You have a medical degree?"

"Well, legally….no…" Doctor Castform said after a moment. "But I killed David Tennant in single combat, so I deserve his title, I am thinking."

"You can sit here," Kirlia said with a wave, pointing to the empty seat next to her. Flygon practically let out a whimper of relief and flew over to her.

"You doing okay?" Kirlia asked with concern on her face. "The people here seem really weird."

"Yeah," Flygon admitted. "To think that I thought season one was exaggerated for entertainment purposes."

Toucannon looked over the people in the seats, giving them a bemused look. "That's so odd…."

"Are you referring to the number of Pokemon in the bus?" Porygon asked in a low, mechanical voice. "Because I've come to the same conclusion as you. Not everyone is here."

"Great minds think alike, I suppose," Toucannon said with a chuckle. "There's supposed to be thirty-six Pokemon competing in this season, and there are quite a few empty seats."

"I've calculated several likely reasons that could explain their absence," Porygon said. "Most likely is that they found another mode of transportation."

"Forgive me if I sound indelicate," Toucannon said. "But you're a robot, correct?"

"Well, that's one way you could refer to me," Porygon admitted. "I much prefer to refer to myself as an AI, or an 'Artificially Created' Pokemon. The term Robot alludes to the Czech word for forced labor. Not exactly something I like to call myself."

"Oy, Robot!" Castform shouted. "Get over here; we're going to do some experiments!"

Porygon let out a metallic sigh. "My programming prevents me from denying this order."

He got up from his seat and drove over to an enthusiastic Castform. Toucannon shook his head and laughed.

"Hey," came another voice. Toucannon glanced back to look at Furret, who was leaning over his seat.

"Can I help you?" Toucannon asked.

"Do you think I have a chance with that beauty over there?" Furret asked, jerking his head to Liepard's direction.

Toucannon gazed at the girl. High strung. Likely had a chip on her shoulder. She was hunched up, so she clearly wasn't very comfortable.

"Don't try it, she has sharp claws," Toucannon warned. "Try out someone sunnier. You're less likely to die that way."

Furret ignored him, strutting up the aisle to greet Liepard.

"So why did he even ask me to begin with?" Toucannon asked, mystified. "Regardless, this will be fun to watch."

Liepard, meanwhile, was stretched out on a bus seat, doing her best to nap. An eye opened when Furret approached.

"Mind if I sit here?" Furret asked with a pleasant smile.

Liepard opened her other eye. "Where were you sitting before, and why can't you sit there now?"

"Toucannon is a nice enough fellow, but I couldn't help but be attracted to your beauty," Furret said. "I'm afraid I had to indulge myself."

"You had to indulge yourself, eh?" Liepard asked with a chuckle.

Furret leaned in closer. "That's right."

Liepard responded by throwing a quick swipe at Furret, causing him to yelp in pain and stumble back. "So did I."

"I understand you perfectly, milady!" Furret said, rubbing his injured face. "Thorns suit a rose as lovely as you."

Liepard groaned.

"Aww man, I was hoping the girls here wouldn't be _too_ scary," Shellder muttered in his own seat. He cast a nervous look to Liepard. "I hope she gets voted off first."

"Wh-why are you s-scared of women?" Heliolisk asked. He blushed in embarrassment at his stuttering.

"I don't want to talk about it," Shellder muttered, also blushing.

"Hey!" Rockruff barked, his tail wagging as he looked out the window. "I think we're almost there!"

"Huh, cool," Klefki said, as he, Kecleon, and Throh crowded around it. "Um…anyone have any keys on them?"

"What kind of question is that?" Throh asked. "Oh man, I'm so excited!"

The bus began to slow, and the competing Pokemon all looked around at each other, excited. Emolga was leaping up and down, Growlithe let out a howl of excitement, and even Crobat looked interested, giving a curious grin to Victini, who was walking towards the bus.

The bus doors opened, and Victini looked inside. "Hey guys! I'm Victini, host of the show. We're going to call you out in alphabetical order, so you can introduce yourselves!"

"Wow," Chandelure whispered, looking at the legendary longingly. "What a dreamboat."

"Uh, haha, yeah," Victini said, scratching the back of his head. "Well, I'll be…uh…outside."

"Aww, he's so awkward," Mawile said, chuckling. "That's so adorable."

"Better awkward then sadistic," Ariados said. "Certainly a breath of fresh air."

0000

"So, you got a glimpse of them, but I think it's time for some formal introductions," Victini said, taking out a list. "Let's start with Ab-"

"Oy, do not forget!" Hariyama said, rolling down the window of his limousine. "You're supposed to advertise-"

"Oh right," Victini said, and his smile became fixed. "Uh…we're sponsored by the Ivysaur

Perfume Company. Want to smell like an Ivysaur, now you can!"

He looked at Hariyama. "Was that it?"

"For the next twenty minutes, yes," Hariyama said. "Advertisement for Venusaur Aftershave needs to happen soon."

"Ugh, whatever," Victini said. "Absol, just get out here."

The dark type stepped down the stairs, flashing the camera a grin. She walked with poise and confidence, and gave Victini a hug instead of a handshake.

"Anything to tell the viewers?" Victini asked, chuckling.

"You're looking at the first contestant and future winner," Absol said with a wink. "You'd better pay attention to me."

"Well, you're brimming with confidence, aren't you?" Victini said. "Could that be your downfall?"

Absol blinked, as if she hadn't considered this, but shook her head. "Nuh-uh. If I lose, I lose, but you won't see me bitching about it until it gets to that point. My mindset will stay the same unless the votes are cast against me."

"Well spoken," Victini said. "Next up, we have Ariados. Let's go!"

"I'm right here," Ariados whispered, hanging from some string behind him.

Victini shrieked and stumbled away, prompting Ariados to giggle.

"Don't _do_ that!" Victini hissed. "You nearly scared the immortality out of me."

"Oh, it was just some harmless fun," Ariados said, rolling her eyes. She glanced at the camera. "Keep an eye on me and I'm sure we'll have a good time."

"Ugh, just…sit next to Absol," Victini grumbled. "Okay, uh, next up we have-oh…here comes a pair of contestants who came via police cruiser. Who allowed a criminal on our show?"

Absol and Ariados exchanged a glance as a Beedrill stepped out of the car, flanked by a Butterfree and a Herdier carrying a nightstick.

"Remember, you're still on probation, so no funny business," Herdier barked. "Give the other inmates something to aspire to when they watch this show."

"The other inmates can screw off," Beedrill growled. "Trust me, I'm not stupid enough to get myself thrown back in there."

"Fair enough," the Herdier said with a chuckle. "Watch over him, will you, Butterfree?"

"Have been since the day he was born," the Butterfree said. "Can't say I've done a good job, but whatever. Have a good day, officer.'

"So, we have our first pair of brothers on the show," Victini said. "Beedrill and Butterfree."

"I'm the brains and he's the brawn," Butterfree said. "Together we're an unmatched team."

"You're not _that_ much smarter than me," Beedrill said with a scowl. "They say I'm the one with the ego, and that's complete bull."

"Okay," Victini said, checking the list. "Uh…Bellossom, introduce yourself!"

Nobody left the bus. Weavile stuck his head out.

"No Bellosom here, boss. Must've called it quits."

"What?" Victini snapped. "Aw, come on! Are we going to have to hunt him down!?"

"Nah, I'm here, man, just decided to walk it," a new voice piped up. Bellosom, carrying nothing but a rather old looking ukulele, walked up, shaking an astonished Victini's hand. "Couldn't really afford the fare."

"We could've supplied you with-"Victini started, but Bellosom waved him off.

"It was fun. I stowed away on a boat and made some nice folks," Bellosom said with a wide smile. "So glad to be here."

"Uh…great to have you," Victini said, scratching his head. "Come out next, Castform."

"Doctor Castform," Castform corrected, flying out of a bus window. "Can I interest you in a drink?"

"Uh…your bio informs me that accepting anything from you would be very bad for my health," Victini said.

Castform rolled his eyes. "Humbug! People these days, can't even take a shot of arsine."

"Chandelure, please come now and introduce yourself!" Victini shouted. "Damn it, I knew I'd get a bunch of weirdos again."

Chandelure floated after Castform, giving Victini a little wave. "Uh…hi! Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, Chandelure," Victini said, relieved that he was finally speaking to someone normal. "Any ambitions?"

"I was thinking of writing about my time spent here," Chandelure said, her face lighting up with excitement. "Plus, these types of shows are romance city. I'd like to find love here."

"That's both sweet and grounded," Victini said. "Why can't you be like that Castform?"

"Doctor Castform!"

"Whatever, I'm next," Crobat said, flying out. "Don't bother giving me an introduction."

"Ah, I almost forgot!" Victini said, snapping a finger. "We have a very special guest today."

"God dammit."

"Crobat's been in a few reality shows, so you may recognize him from television," Victini said. "Granted, he's not Cacturne, but he was our solid second choice."

"Leave me alone," Crobat snapped, flying next to Beedrill. "Stop trying to single me out, or I'll make Ninjask's barbs feel like mild tickling."

"Noted," Victini said with a gulp. "N-next."

Emolga followed, giving the camera a little twirl, followed by Feebas, who was carried by Gengar. Though the fish showed enthusiasm at the prospect of competing, the competitors all gave her patronizing looks; it was clear she wasn't the one who was going to win.

Flygon left next, introducing himself politely, followed by Furret, who gave Victini compliments as though he were a buxom waitress, and had the fox blushing in no time. Next came Growlithe, who scrambled down the stairs and grinned around at the competition.

"So, I've heard you took a bit of an injury playing for varsity in high school a few years back," Victini said after he introduced himself. "Think it'll slow you down?"

"Me? No way," Growlithe scoffed. "I'm better on my bad leg than most people are on their good limb. I'm not worried about anything physical."

Followed by Growlithe was Heliolisk, who stuttered through the little interview, much to his annoyance. Soon he was cursing, stuttering, and trying to speak to Victini at the same time, until Victini decided enough was enough and had him move next to Gengar.

"Kecleon!" Victini said. "You're here aren't you?"

"Sure thing!" a peppy chameleon said, strolling over to Victini, giving an exaggerated grin. "But if you didn't want me here you could purchase my warp ball, an item that teleports foes long distances! Care to buy one?"

"Damn Kecleons, money grubbers, the lot of them," Victini scowled to himself, before clearing his throat. "My deepest apologies Kecleon, but only Venusaur Enterprises merchandise may be sold here. You can keep your wares, or give them away, but no exchange that involves money."

"What?" Kecleon asked, horrified. "Curse monopolies that trod upon small business owners like myself!"

"Don't bullshit me, the Kecleon Clan practically owns the mail system," Victini scowled. "Now quit bitching and sit with everyone else! Kirlia, get out here!"

"On my way," Kirlia said, letting out a deep breath. She stepped down, shaking Victini's hand. "It is very nice to be here."

"Nice to have you," Victini said. "Your ballet in the audition tape was very impressive."

"Thank you very much," Kirlia said, smiling.

Klefki was the next to float down, and he greeted the host politely enough, but soon Victini realized his car keys were gone. He didn't want to make a scene of it, considering he was on tape, so he called the next Pokemon on the list instead; Komala.

The koala tottered down the steps, letting out a big yawn. He blinked a couple times, before giving Victini a small smile.

"Hello."

Victini tried not to snort. "Hi there. Ready to compete?"

Komala looked confused a moment before realization dawned on him. "Oh bother. I forgot that was today. I thought I was on my way to a eucalyptus festival."

"Uh, we'll get you some, so don't worry about it?" Victini questioned, clearly confused. "Just go sit with the others for now."

Komala tottered away, letting out another big yawn as Emolga cooed at how cute he was being.

Liepard came next, offering nothing but a glare of warning not to mess with her, followed by Magmar, who greeted Victini with false reverence. Victini was about to call down Mawile, before the roaring of a motorcycle could be heard.

"Ah, I think that's another competitor!" Victini said in excitement.

"Ooh, I've never stolen motorcycle keys before," Klefki whispered.

The motorcycle arrived, and the Pokemon on top, Lilligant, slid off. She stretched a bit, before giving Victini and the others a monotonous stare.

"This is Lilligant!" Victini said. "The heiress to Lilligant Industries and rival to Venusaur productions. Which uh…I'm legally required to say here is superior in every way."

"Recruiting Plant Girl onto this show was a mistake," Lilligant said in a monotone, nasally voice. "Plant Girl will restore the natural order and grind Venusaur into the dust. Be warned."

"Hey, I'm just the messenger, don't cut me down," Victini said. "Speaking of which, are you tired of cutting yourself while shaving? Venusaur Aftershave goes a step further and invokes a floral healing that will wipe away all slices and bruises! Order now!"

"So, you're an heiress?" Flygon asked, giving Lilligant a curious look. "I imagine it must be a lot of pressure."

"Plant Girl has been trained for it," Lilligant said. "Plant Girl was thrown into a pile of Arbok as an infant with no way to escape. The Arbok did not survive."

"Damn," Growlithe said with a snort that expelled fire.

"Oh, she's bluffing," Butterfree said, rolling his eyes.

"Pretty…interesting cast so far, wouldn't you say?" Gengar said to Feebas with a laugh.

"More like freaking weird," Feebas said through a stream of bubbles. "To think that I thought that I'd stick out like a sore thumb."

"May I take your bags?" Furret asked, flashing Lilligant a smile as he approached. "I wouldn't want a lovely lady like yourself strain-"

Lilligant responded by judo flipping the poor ferret over her head, slamming him on the ground. "You got too close."

Furret moaned from where his face was planted. "Point taken."

Presently, a trumpet sounded, and Victini's ears perked up. Approaching the lot was a massive chariot, pulled by two grumpy Rapidash.

"Huh," Victini said with a chuckle. "The heiress and the prince arrive together. That's pretty fitting."

"Wait, did you say prince?" Doctor Castform asked, glancing up.

"Declaring the prince of Persian, Meowth IV!" A Chatot screeched into a megaphone.

The door to the chariot opened, and a red carpet flew out. Meowth strutted down, preening his grey fur.

He gave an odd glance at the campers staring dumbfoundedly at him. "What? You may bow now, if that is your wish?"

"Pretty chariot and impressive title," Crobat said, looking the cat up and down. "Compensating for something?"

"How dare you insult the prince!" Chatot snarled, drawing himself up, but Meowth snapped his fingers to shut him up.

"I don't mind, Chatot; In fact, I like some cattiness between my subjects," Meowth said, before fixing Crobat with a deadly stare. "But you will respect your superiors. I could have your head with a single snap of my fingers."

Gengar cleared his throat. "You're prince of Persian, yes? A long way away from our humble land here. Even the strongest Wishiwashi is still considered weak if he's alone. You want respect? Earn it yourself."

"If I need to claw myself up from the bottom, so be it," Meowth said, extending his claws to prove his point. "Still, you'd be foolish to underestimate me."

"Trust me, I don't underestimate anyone," Crobat said. "But you're no different than any other asshole here, so stop acting so high and mighty."

"Kettle meet pot," Beedrill mumbled.

"What was that?" Crobat snapped.

"You heard me."

"Plant Girl is sensing tension," Lilligant said. "If necessary, Plant Girl will unleash spores to knock out the disputers."

"That…won't be necessary, Lilligant," Victini yelped. "Uh…Let's just get the rest of the cast here and fight later, all right? We're low on runtime."

Mawile finally could greet everyone, and she fist bumped Emolga, followed by Mimikyu, which resulted in an awkward conversation with Mimikyu answering Victini's questions in whispers and mad cackles.

Noivern was next to come, and she greeted everyone with a quick guitar solo, with Beedrill grinning at her taste in music and Komala covering his ears at the noise. Victini, his ears still ringing, called out Pawniard's name.

"Hey everyone," the knight said in a voice that sounded like a knife being sharpened. "Hope we can all enjoy a game like this."

Despite their best efforts, nobody could take their eyes off the awards hanging on Pawniard's body. "Those medals…they were issued to those who fought in the Doduo War, right?" Emolga asked in a hushed whisper.

Pawniard laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Fighting is an understatement. I never saw combat; I was just a chef there. Still though, I guess I technically count as a veteran."

"That's cool," Flygon said, holding out a hand to shake Pawniard's. "I just graduated military academy myself. I'm planning on shipping out a few weeks after the show's wrapped up."

"Good for you," Pawniard said. "You'd have the rank of second lieutenant then?"

"Yes sir," Flygon said. "Or at least…I will."

The next to introduce himself was Popplio, and he was an odd one. He claimed he was a clown and performed tricks for the contestants, much to Emolga, Komala, and Kirlia's delight. After blowing everyone a balloon dog each, an exasperated Victini told him that they needed to hurry up.

Porygon came next, introducing himself politely, followed by Rockruff, who greeted his fellow dog Growlithe, causing the other canine to blush in embarrassment. Samurott came next, and the contestants that weren't present on the bus gave him curious stares. His interview was awkward too, as he refused to say a word, though he did mime a bit.

"Hey bud, thought you might need this," Kecleon said, passing him a notepad. "On the house, but I'm charging for any extra papers."

Sawk came next, giving a quick greeting and stepping just as quickly out of the spotlight, and when it was Shellder turn he shied away from the girls, much to Emolga's disappointment.

"Uh…hey, I'm Throh, and I'm a big, strong, tough guy!" Throh said, flexing his muscles as he stepped out. "Hyaa!"

"You're doing it wrong," Crobat drawled. "Don't strain yourself, idiot."

He tried to jump at Crobat, but he tripped over his feet and fell flat on his face, leaving Crobat laughing.

"So, this is my competition, then?" Toucannon said, glancing from a moaning Throh to Feebas, who was still stuck in her bowl. "Shame. I should have signed on for season one. They'd at least put up a fight."

Crobat attempted to snap back, but Mawile slapped him upside the head.

"Ow, the shit was that for!?" Crobat yelped.

"No more quips," Mawile giggled. "We're low on runtime."

"That just leaves Weavile," Victini said. "Should be the only one in the-"

"I'm not the only one in the bus!" Weavile said, leaping out the window. "Someone's scrambling around in there!"

"What?" Victini asked. "But we have thirty six out here….so that should be it-"

"HAHA!" came a squeaky voice, and a Rattata climbed on top of the bus. "It is I! The thirty seventh member!"

"We didn't invite a Rattata," Victini said, mystified. "Hariyama, did we invite a Rattata?"

Hariyama shrugged.

"Fool!" Rattata shrieked, jumping off the roof of the bus. He thrust paperwork into the legendary's hands. "Proof of our covenant!"

"Huh," Victini said, peering at the papers. "Well, these are legitimate. I signed them myself….I guess…I goofed again and we have our thirty seventh contestant!...Again?"

"Ha, you may as well give up now!" Rattata screeched. "I'm in the top percentage of Rattata."

"You know, Rattata, I respect the fact that you only exist to make that one, overused joke," Mawile said. "That's your purpose in life, and I can't shame you for that."

"Hey, be fair," Crobat snickered. "He fills the quota for the thirty seventh contestant joke too."

Rattata scoffed at their chortling, but Victini cleared his throat to avoid more screeching.

"So we have our cast! Everyone, glance around at each other. These are your friends and enemies for the next two months. For those of you who watched season one, you know how this goes. You will be split into teams. For the first half of our season's runtime, both teams will compete in challenges. At the end of the challenge one team is given immunity and the other will face the elimination of one of its members. This will continue until we go from thirty-seven to eighteen, in which the teams will disband and it will be every contestant for themselves. The number will drop to ten, where we'll have a very special episode, and then to two, where the last of the remaining contestants will duke it out to determine the winner of our show!"

"Yeah, yeah, we get it," Crobat said. "Get to the part where you rip off better shows and steal challenges from them."

"I do not care for you," Victini grumbled. "BUT! Though those are the basic rules, this season will be very, very different in mechanics and game changers. We'll go over that next episode, but the whole experience is changing thematically! It's gonna be great!"

"I noticed," Toucannon said. "We seem to be competing in a film lot?"

"That's correct, my fine feathered friend," Victini replied. "And the challenges will be built around them. For now though, I'd like to remind you of two mechanics that will be returning. First is mega evolution…"

The campers that could mega evolve perked up. Absol high fived Mawile and Gengar let a mysterious smile play on his face, all while Beedrill smirked to himself.

"And the second is the immunity idol, this time in the shape of an Emmy award. Oh, and no forging them this time. None of that Carbink and Scrafty shit. That'll call for automatic elimination. Same with rigging the votes. Got it?"

Magmar looked very disappointed as Furret cracked a grin at the sight of his face.

"Next episode, we'll have a tour and announce the first challenge," Victini said. "To end this episode though, I'd like every contestant to leave a message on our confessional, to break it in and give our audience a final first impression. Have at it!"

 **0000**

 **Pawniard looked around at the confessional around him, which was a fancy make up trailer. "Wow. Way to upgrade."**

 **He cleared his throat. "I hope you support me in this show. I have some experience in dangerous situations and I promise to be of great moral fiber. My superiors beat an honor code into me and I'll be damned if it fails me now. Your support would be greatly appreciated."**

 **0000**

" **Look, I really only signed up for one of these shows as a joke, but now that I'm here?" Weavile asked. "Hell yeah I'm going to win. I think I got the skills for it, and I'm not as quirky or extreme as some of the other weirdos here. I should be fine, so expect to see me in the finale."**

 **0000**

" **I really don't think I stand a chance at winning," Feebas said, poking her head out of the fish bowl to allow a Mr. Mime to apply makeup to her. "But I did watch last season. A ton of Pokemon evolved last then, so if I'm lucky maybe I'll follow suit if I can get lucky. Oh, and I promise not to be a dick, so root for me, okay?"**

 **0000**

 **Samurott looked a little awkward, sitting in the confessional without saying anything. Soon remembering the notebook Kecleon give him, he tried writing something down, only to notice that he wasn't given a pencil or pen. As such, all he could do was give the camera a sheepish look.**

 **0000**

 **Mimikyu was giggling to herself maniacally. "I'll win the money, but I have some side plans for some of the more, popular contestants here. Soon, I will rule this game, and become loved by everyone! And if they don't, I'll make them!"**

 **0000**

" **So apparently, I can't even make a profit while I'm here," Kecleon grumped. "What was the point of even joining the show then? Oh well, maybe I can get some advertising done."**

 **0000**

 **Noivern was strumming a guitar. "Look, I'm not much of a talker. I need the money here to jump start my band and get my parents off my back. I'm not into making friends, so don't expect me to be nice. Just expect me to win."**

 **0000**

" **Oh bother," Komala said with a yawn. "Was I supposed to have a speech planned out or something? Um…I'll do my best I guess." Soon he was snoring.**

 **0000**

" **I think I might be coming to regret this a bit," Kirlia said with a pained expression. "There's a lot of people here, and I'm not the best with large groups in close quarters. Still though, please support me in this game."**

 **0000**

" **Right, so I was in prison," Beedrill said, waving his hands in surrender. "I'd like to move past that. I did something stupid once, paid the price, and got to go free. Leave it at that, all right? If you don't want me to win, that's fine, but at least don't insult me behind my back, okay? At least have the balls to look me in the eyes..."**

 **0000**

" **I was at the top back in my hometown," Flygon explained. "Great grades, popularity, and I was quarterback on the football team. I don't like to be stagnant though, so I figure an experience like this might humble me. Win or lose, I'm a human too, guys. Even if I'm…technically a Pokemon…right. Forgot humans aren't a thing anymore."**

" **Damn it, can we do another take?" Flygon pleaded. "Please?"**

 **0000**

" **Wow, everyone here is really attractive," Chandelure said with a girlish giggle. "I've already taken notes on who would make cute couples."**

 **She blinked. "Oh, right, and I totally want to win, yeah."**

 **0000**

" **You would not believe how prepared for this moment I am," Magmar explained. "I've watched every episode of Island repeatedly and developed the perfect blend of strategy of the best players in that game. Umbreon, Shuckle, Gallade, Zorua, Slowking, and my hero Scrafty. You're my inspiration and my means of winning."**

 **0000**

" **Hi!" Emolga said, leaning in close to the camera. "Oh dude, I am so hyped to be here. I love the atmosphere of it all! The quirky people, the stage around us, the challenges! For once I get to be a part of it and that's awesome!"**

 **Emolga threw her hands up. "Who cares if I win? I'm on TV"**

 **0000**

" **In truth, I just joined to talk to women," Furret admitted, flashing a smile. "I went to an all boys school. Sue me."**

 **0000**

" **Yeah, this looks like fun," Ariados said, spinning from a web. "Surprisingly the people here are pretty cool. Usually people get freaked out because of my appearance. Honestly it's probably my fault because I encourage it a bit too much, but still, this is a breath of fresh air."**

 **0000**

" **These people should really look after their belongings," Klefki said, giggling at all the array of keys strewn out. "This is going to be a fun show."**

 **0000**

" **I've downloaded various strategies and internalized as much of the first season of the show as I could," Porygon said. "I may lack adaptability, but no one can outspeed an AI mentally. The odds of winning in my favor are high, and I'm not programmed to lie."**

 **0000**

" **If you know me, you know the way I work," Crobat said. "If you don't, then sit back and enjoy. I lie, cheat, steal, and manipulate, stuff I'm known quite well for doing. The reputation's screwed me over in the past, but I plan to play a different hand. I assume you expect much of me, considering my experience in this field."**

 **He flashed an evil grin. "I promise to exceed your expectations, dear viewers."**

 **0000**

" **Crobat's an asshole, but he has a sense of humor," Mawile said. "Emolga's cool, and everyone's been friendly so far. I could have some fun here."**

" **Look, if we're being real here, my therapist thought this would be good for me," she said. "I've been a little off my game lately, so she wanted me to get some fresh air and do an activity. Probably wasn't expecting to see me on international television, but hey. I'm feeling pretty good so far."**

 **0000**

 **Popplio was juggling in the confessional, not even paying attention to camera. He threw all three balls up, before shooting a bubble that caught them.**

" **C'mon, give me the win for that trick!" he said. "Please?"**

 **0000**

 **Growlithe sat down, shooting an ember at an intern that moved to powder his face. "I should be fine. I'm athletic and all, and I'm a good team player. Do I need to be more than that, at least for the first part of the game?"**

 **He blushed a little. "Plus, uh…the season's movie themed…and acting isn't the worst thing in the world."**

 **0000**

" **I'm going to be candid with you," Toucannon said. "I'm a ruthless man. You have to be, to get to my level. I'm competing in this show purely because of the monetary gain. My first goal is to take the lead of my team, informally or formally, and decide the votes based on my blunt but fair reasoning. Once my position of power is certain, winning will be simple."**

 **0000**

" **I like to think of myself as a strategist and a scholar," Butterfree said. "After all, I've been accepted to all of the best schools from Kanto to Alola. Life's a big competition sometimes, and competing with other faceless Pokemon gets boring at times, so this show will be the ultimate test of my skills. It'll also give my brother something to do other than rot in jail while I work on getting enough money to bail him out. He gets… restless when he has nothing to do."**

" **Just know that both of us are threats," Butterfree said with narrowed eyes, not wanting to speak for any longer. "Make no mistake."**

 **0000**

" **I hate social interaction. I hate idiots. I hate cheesy shows that exaggerate drama and create it out of nothing. I hate film lots," Liepard muttered. "If it weren't for the money…"**

 **0000**

 **Bellossom relaxed, looking around at his confessional. "Wow, I'm living the life of luxury here, eh? I'm a little overwhelmed."**

" **I guess the prize for winning this is money, yeah?" Bellossom asked. "I'll just donate it or something. Ha! Imagine me, winning?"**

 **0000**

 **Castform used his teeth to set up two mechanical arms to connect to his torso. "Good. Now I can stop picking up things with my mouth."**

" **I'll win," Castform said. "I've been to the future and all that. You may as well stop watching."**

 **0000**

" **Confidence is key, y'all," Absol said with a wink. "I'll win this with sheer charisma, just you watch."**

 **0000**

" **I-I'm not very good at communicating with others," Heliolisk managed to stutter out. "I hate it, but I can barely get through a sentence. It doesn't exactly make me most popular guy of the year."**

" **Maybe winning might change my reputation," Heliolisk said with a chuckle. "O-or at least a trip to the speech therapist."**

 **0000**

" **It seems I have a lot to prove if I want the other's respect," Meowth said, allowing attendants to pamper him and clean his nails. "It'd probably be easier just to have them all executed, but the easy way out isn't very fulfilling."**

 **His eyes narrowed. "I'm the prince of Persian for a reason, and I intend to show it."**

 **0000**

" **I'm bad at making decisions," Rockruff said with a sad whine. "The voting ceremony is going to be hell."**

 **0000**

" **I'm excited for an experience like this!" Shellder said, sticking out his tongue. "I'm not really the best with women, but hey, everyone faces roadblocks, right?"**

" **I may not win, but I'll put up a fight," he said, smiling. "Maybe Furret'll know a way to help me get rid of my phobia. He seems to know what he's doing…"**

 **0000**

" **Okay, okay, I admit it!" Throh mumbled. "I don't like fighting at all. I've always wanted to be a tap dancer, but with my body…"**

 **He let out a sigh. "But don't tell anyone! They'll boot me off so fast my head will spin!"**

 **0000**

" **In truth I had no intention of speaking in a confessional," Gengar said. "It seems that this one is mandatory though, so I'll have to deal with that."**

 **He cleared his throat. "I have no intention of losing this game, though I have no interest in the money. I guess in vaguest terms you could consider it a thirst to prove myself, but it goes deeper than that."**

 **Gengar grinned. "I'll admit it, I'm teasing you all a little. In truth, I may not even last that long. Try not to get your hopes up; if I lose I'm sure there will be others deserving of attention."**

 **0000**

 **Sawk folded his arms. "Hey. I don't have a lot to say, other than to expect a team player out of me. I follow rules, and I think order is important in games like this."**

" **However, when the teams are destroyed and only few remain?" A cruel smile formed on Sawk's face. "I'll obliterate the enemy. Nobody will be left in my wake."**

 **0000**

" **Plant Girl has a lot to prove," Lilligant said, applying makeup to her face. "She excels at everything and will continue to excel until victory is achieved. If she does not meet expectations set up by her older sisters, Plant Girl will be laughing stock of the family. Mistakes cannot be tolerated."**

 **0000**

" **A new threat in the midst!" Rattata squawked (?). "Or so you would think!"**

 **He ripped off his mask, revealing the face of none other than Pidgey. "I've deceived you! It is time for Pidgey to strike again! You may have doubted me before, but this time I will get revenge on this show and how I was cast aside, all under the guise of being the top percentage of Rattata! Mwahahahaha!"**

 **0000**

 **Yeah, Pidgey has returned for season two. Because everyone** _ **loved**_ **him, right? Why do I do this to myself?**

 **I didn't enjoy writing this, I'll admit. I like the characters and I'm excited for the series, but this was absolute torture. I hope it isn't too crappy to you guys, but this chapter just did not do it for me. Hopefully this won't be a recurring theme.**

 **Anyway, if you enjoyed, please leave a review telling me about your first impression of the characters! I'd love some feedback, especially from the writers of the OC's submitted, just as a check in.**

 **Expect the next chapter soon. This will be one hell of a ride.**

 **Editor's Note: Heyo! Premasaur here, dropping in with a quick hello. Much like with Total Pokkemon Island, I'll be working as the editor for Total Pokkemon Action, too. And this time I get to work for the entire series! So, if there's stupid grammatical mistakes, spelling mistakes, or other obvious mistakes that I miss in the dozen times I go through these chapters, feel free to shout at me all you want, for I work as the prime meat shield for those kinds of comments.**

 **We hope you enjoy this series as much as the last one! Premasaur out!**

 **Victini: Review! It's Season Two: Electric Boogaloo! Sorry, had to make that joke at least once, it's obligatory.**


	2. Chapter 2: Walk the Dinosaur

**Hey guys, and welcome to the second episode of season two! Unlike last time, I'm actually hyped to dig into this one. Bon Appétit.**

0000

"So, what do you think the challenges will be like this season?" Emolga whispered to Mawile. "Apparently they got pretty crazy last time."

"Well, thematically, I assume they'll somehow relate to our location," Mawile said, glancing around. "It's a pretty fancy film lot, so I don't think they'd let that go to waste."

The contestants were piling up in an open top bus that Hariyama was driving. Victini ushered them in, before floating in front of them as the car started to drive.

"Wow, this place is huge!" Rockruff barked, wagging his tail. "There are so many sets!"

"Well, enjoy this place, Rockruff," Victini said with a smile. "Because this is your playground for the time you spend here. We'll be doing thematically appropriate challenges as well, so expect some unique twists."

"You said that this season had many unique gimmicks and differences from the season past," Toucannon said. "Perhaps you could explain them now?"

"Of course!" Victini said. "Well, uh…first off…every challenge we do will be based off a famous movie. This won't be typical, vanilla stuff, so be prepared for some weird shit. There's another, brand new element to challenges now, one that can change the flow of the game."

Magmar was dozing, but Victini's words snapped him awake. He gazed at Victini with interest.

"Acting is very important in movies," Victini said. "We'd like you to get into character to make the challenges seem real to our audience. The cast-mate with the best acting for a character that fits best into the movie setting will be given automatic immunity for the day, regardless of the team they are on."

"Ooh, I love acting!" Emolga said, clapping her hands. "Can I sing, too?"

"No," Victini deadpanned.

Crobat and Growlithe both looked awkward, and Pawniard gave them a curious look.

 **0000**

" **I said acting wasn't the worst thing in the world, and I uh…I guess I'm pretty experienced in it," Growlithe admitted. "But c'mon! I'm a jock! I don't want to waste my time dancing and singing when I could be kicking ass!"**

 **0000**

" **I consider myself more of an author then an actress," Ariados admitted. "I've been told my voice is very monotone and my appearance is far too intimidating to play off a starring role."**

 **She groaned. "I may have screwed myself over with this season."**

 **0000**

"The top percentage of Rattata does not need to act!" Rattata boasted, gnashing his teeth. "I'll destroy the competition so fast they won't be able to say a word!"

"Well, uh! Ha! I will meet you in combat, dreaded Rattata!" Throh said. "Um…Hwa!"

"YA!"

"FWAH!"

"GRAAH!"

 **0000**

" **Fake ass losers, the both of them," Weavile said with a snicker. "I bet even Feebas could take them out with a single swipe."**

 **He thought for a moment. "Oy, Feebas I want to try something, get over here!"**

 **0000**

 **Feebas was sitting on an unconscious Throh and Rattata. "So, um…I think I might actually stand a chance here if there's such an emphasis on acting. I may be a weak fish, but that has no impact on acting ability, right? Don't count me out yet!"**

 **0000**

"You're writing what he's saying down, are you?" Meowth asked, poking Magmar, who was scribbling down on a notebook like his life depended on it.

"Yeah, what of it?" Magmar snapped.

"Oh nothing," Meowth said with a chuckle. "I just never knew that the lowborn were taught to read and write."

Magmar glared at him. "Was that an insult?"

Meowth snickered. "Oh, were my words too big?"

"Enough guys!" Victini barked. "Stop chattering! We've arrived at our destination!"

"But this one's just a boring city!" Chandelure moaned. "Can't our challenge start in one of the fun sets instead?"

Victini didn't respond, instead flashing a grin.

Toucannon fixed Victini with a cool gaze. "What are you-"

He was interrupted by a powerful roar.

A Tyrantrum, far bigger than one could possibly be in real life, reared its literal ugly head from behind a convenience store. With a single step he crushed the store, before closing in on the bus.

"You had to open your big mouth, didn't you?" Heliolisk shrieked. "If I die here I swear I'll sue!"

"Oh, stop being a baby," Victini said with a groan. "They're all animatronic and won't cause _serious_ damage. The 'beat around and knocking out kind of damage? Most certainly. But he won't like, kill you or anything."

"So, that's our challenge?" Porgyon asked, gazing at the prehistoric Pokemon without fear. "Avoid the animatronic Despot Pokemon?"

"There's more to it than that!" Victini said, ignoring the squirming of the contestants as the Tyrantrum drew closer. "The dinosaur animatronics are plentiful in number, so you'll have to avoid them as well. However, each animatronic has a nest of eggs to be found; nineteen of them in total. The nineteen players who deliver said eggs to me will be the first team of the season, the Unique Umbreons. The loser team will be the Sucky Shuckles."

"But where are the-" Popplio started, but Victini teleported away. Soon after, everyone heard another fierce roar, and looked up to see the giant Tyrantrum leering over the bus.

Flygon grabbed the seal's arm. "We need to move now guys! Pile out!"

"Split up and run in different directions!" Butterfree shouted. "Confuse the beast!"

The thirty-seven contestants dove out of the bus, sprinting off in different directions. The confused Tyrantrum bit at them, _just_ missing Kecleon, before biting down on Sawk's foot.

"Sawk, no!" Feebas yelped. Gengar, who was carrying her in her fish bowl, turned and stared in horror at the Tyrantrum lifting him up.

Gengar started to charge a shadow ball, before he hesitated.

"What's going on?" Feebas asked, glancing up at him. "Help him!"

Gengar narrowed his eyes. "He's up to something."

Meanwhile Sawk made a show of struggling to rip his foot free, but secretly glanced at his surroundings. After a moment, he grinned.

"My species may be compared to Throh's, but unlike him I'm actually a competent fighter!" Sawk growled, bringing up his free foot and slamming it into Tyrantrum's mechanical throat. Tyrantrum roared and loosened his grip on Sawk's leg as the blue Pokemon charged up a focus blast, throwing it at Tyrantrum at point range. The opposite reaction caused Sawk to propel through the air. He flipped and landed on a tall building.

"Thanks for the bird's eye view," he said with a chuckle, sprinting away and hopping from window to window.

As Tyrantrum shook off his daze, Gengar gave a slow clap to Sawk's performance.

"That was well played," Gengar said. "He had a view of the whole lot from up there. I'm a bit jealous I didn't think of that first."

"Er, Gengar," Feebas gulped, pointing at Tyrantrum with a fin. "He's looking really angry."

"Don't fear," Gengar said, snapping his fingers. "We'll become one with the shadows."

By the time Tyrantrum arrived, both Pokemon had vanished.

 **0000**

" **I know where the nest is," Sawk said to himself. "But nest implies that there are more than one of them. I'll need to pick my teammates carefully."**

 **0000**

"Heliolisk, buddy, you need to calm down," Shellder said. "Do you want a glass of water or something?"

"I'm okay…it's okay…" he whispered. "Aww man I'm freaking out! I'm gonna die!"

"You won't die," Furret whispered. "Come now, don't you want to show off for the lovely ladies watching?"

"Oh man I forgot…" Shellder said, turning green. "There are girls watching this show. Okay, Heliolisk, I can relate to you now."

"These three are useless," Butterfree hissed to Beedrill. "Even if we did win, I don't want them on my team. Let's ditch them and find a nest ourselves?"

"Can you stop being a dick for about two seconds?" Beedrill snapped. "All we do by leaving them now is make us look like assholes."

"Fine, whatever, you can keep them," Butterfree said with a cool grin. "But you're taking responsibility to feed and walk them."

"Fuck off," Beedrill snapped. "God, at least the assholes in prison were up front about how they thought about people."

"You guys planning something?" Furret piped up. "Because we have a situation!"

"Lovely," Beedrill muttered. "What is it now?"

"An Aurorous," Shellder said. "Ha, they don't look so tough."

"I'm pretty sure that one's supposed to be a girl," Heliolisk said.

"Gah, kill it with fire!"

"Relax," Butterfree grumbled. "Aurorous are slow Pokemon, and most of us are fairly quick. We should be capable of outmaneuvering her easily if we're careful."

"Okay, but can we count to three or something?" Heliolisk asked.

"No!" Butterfree growled. "Go, go now!"

His harsh words prompted the Pokemon into action. Shellder hopped on Heliolisk's back, and the lizard climbed up a building wall with ease. Butterfree and Beedrill took to the sky, and Furret was quick enough to avoid Aurorous's icy blast with ease.

But-

"Hey!" Furret barked. "Aurorous…isn't chasing us!"

"What…?" Butterfree asked.

"She won't hesitate to attack us, but she won't move!" Furret confirmed, diving to the side to avoid an ice beam.

"So, she was badly programed," Butterfree said. "We know how cheap Victini is, let's just…"

Shellder slammed into him, knocking the butterfly out of range of a blizzard attack.

"I think there's more to it than that!" Furret shouted, glancing between Aurorous's legs. "Aha! I figured it out! She's guarding her- "

Furret let out a gasp of shock as an icy blast caught him, pinning the poor ferret against a building. He gasped out in pain.

"Damn it," Butterfree growled. "She has _eggs_ she's guarding?"

"Well, that makes this challenge a lot more straightforward," Beedrill said with a smirk. "Take the eggs and we're golden!"

"Easier said than done," Butterfree said. "Especially since Furret's trapped. We _could_ use him as bait…"

"Butterfree, no," Beedrill deadpanned.

"Fine," Butterfree growled. "I'll think of a plan then, sheesh."

 **0000**

 **Beedrill folded his arms. "Butterfree's moral compass is so skewed it reminds me of Dhelmise's from Total Pokemon: Alola.**

" **He's not heartless, and he does care about me, but he's so arrogant and judgmental it's hard to work with him."**

 **0000**

" **Even though the Aurorous was both a mechanical monstrosity and thirsty for my blood," Furret said. "I think we really hit it off. I wonder if I can get her phone number…"**

 **0000**

"Did there have to be a whole herd of these things?" Mawile hissed, ducking behind a pair of garbage cans.

A dozen Armaldo were sniffing around, sharpening their blades. They were about the same height as normal Armaldo, but they moved with quiet and malevolent intelligence.

"We'll be fine," Flygon said, with more confidence than he felt. "I'll cause a distraction, so get ready to run."

"Are you sure?" Kirlia asked. "Don't get into too much danger."

"Don't worry, I'll back him up," Pawniard said. "Just make sure to leave an egg for us when you find it."

"Alright team, good luck!" Flygon shouted, taking flight.

The Armaldo looked up as Flygon descended on them, glaring at the dragon. Kirlia, Mawile, Throh, Absol, and Liepard sprinted in the opposite direction. Pawniard stayed back, blades at the ready.

"Draco meteor!" Flygon growled, shooting a ball of energy in the air. The ball split into meteors that smashed into the Armaldo. Some were sent flying, some tried to avoid them, and some were disintegrated on the spot. He had succeeded in distracting his opponents.

Unfortunately, he didn't destroy all of them, and the noise attracted twice as many Armaldo to the scene.

After getting over their surprise, the Armaldo charged at Flygon, who looked drained. Before the nearest could land a strike, though, Pawniard jumped in the way, deflecting the Armaldo's blade with his own.

"Are you alright?" Pawniard asked, beheading the Armaldo bot and engaging two more.

"I'm uh…. that attack lowers my offense considerably," Flygon said with a gasp. "And using another draco meteor would only lower it further. I'll do my best though."

"Bah, no need, I'll end this quickly."

Pawniard and Flygon glanced up to see Noivern land on the building above them, leering down at the Armaldo.

"Are you here to help us?" Flygon asked hopefully.

"Yeah, yeah, but you'll owe me for this later," Noivern growled. She took a deep breath, before letting out a powerful scream. The impact of it blew all the Armaldos' heads clean off, and their mechanical bodies collapsed.

"They do say rock and roll is bad for your brains," Noivern said with a laugh as she landed next to them. "Guess they were right."

"Thanks for the help," Flygon said, blinking at the ringing in his ear. "But, how did you…"

"Boomburst attack," Noivern said. "It always really works well on mechanical objects for some reason. I wonder what would happen if I tried it on Porgyon…"

"Please don't," Pawniard said. "While I'm grateful for your help, I have to ask why you saved us."

"Found their nest," Noivern said with a shrug. "There are three eggs there, and I realized it was my chance to pick a team. You two put up a fight here, so I'd say your worthy allies."

"If you say so," Flygon said, though he threw a guilty look at the Pokemon who had escaped. "Er…I feel kind of bad."

"You were willing to risk yourself before," Pawniard said, patting his shoulder. "As was I. This is just our reward."

"Fair enough, I guess," Flygon said with a grin. "Lead us there, Noivern!"

 **0000**

" **I like Flygon," Pawniard said with a smile. "He's got a strong sense of honor and loyalty, which is important in a soldier. I already feel like I can trust him. Probably because of our similar backgrounds."**

 **0000**

" **They're both goody two shoes," Noivern said, rolling her eyes. "Not exactly my cup of tea to hang out with, but hey, I know at least those two won't scheme or manipulate. Plus, it's not a bad idea to have allies early on. The less people willing to vote for you, the better."**

 **0000**

"This challenge is perfect for me," Crobat said, scouring the city from a bird's eye view. He watched the many battles between animatronic Pokemon and contestant, and he had knowledge of where the nests were. The thing was though…

"Hey Crobat!" Emolga piped up as she glided over to him. "Seems like we had the same idea, eh?"

"Can you buzz off please?" Crobat snapped. "I really don't have time to babysit you right now."

"Aw, don't be like that," Emolga said. "Why don't we work together?"

"Because I hate you," Crobat drawled.

"Tell me how you really feel," Emolga deadpanned. "Why do you hate me?"

"Because you're annoying," Crobat said. "And sunny. It makes me sick and can you please just leave me alone?"

"Pssh, I'm not annoying," Emolga said, waving him off. "I think you're just lonely."

"And I think that if you don't scram right now I'm going to have a stroke," Crobat snapped.

"Okay, okay, sheesh," Emolga said, raising her hands in surrender. "Only, what about those guys? Will they give you a stroke?"

Crobat glanced at her. "What do you mean-"

A pair of giant Aerodactyl were flying towards them, shooting out sharp stones from their mouths.

"Dammit Emolga, I hate you!" Crobat snarled as he and Emolga dodged in different directions to avoid the stones.

 **0000**

" **I can't wait until she leaves," Crobat growled. "She's not really a threat but she's so obnoxious I might just axe her off next chance I get."**

 **0000**

" **Well, he's snippy, but I know he's smart," Emolga said. "I figured I could learn a thing or two about strategy from him if I worked with Crobat this challenge. He's a lot less mature than I was expecting, though."**

 **0000**

Meowth was on one knee on top of a city building, watching the chaos on the street below. A massive Archeops was roaring and firing attacks at a cluster of contestants, clearly to defend her nest. Her "children", a group of pre-evolved Archen, were sprinting on the ground around her.

Chandelure, Rockruff, Komala and Bellosom were edging around the block, looking for an opportunity to leap at Archeops' nest, wherever it may be. Samurott, Lilligant, and Rattata were battling the Archen.

Samurott was impressive, swinging his two swords with the skill of a samurai. He cut down Archen left and right, and whenever he took a hit his grin widened.

Lilligant, on the other hand, hadn't taken a hit yet, from at least what Meowth had seen. Instead of relying on physical power she danced around her opponents at speeds they couldn't match, occasionally shooting spores and scents to slow them down.

Rattata was shrieking on the ground, being pecked by Archen.

Meowth grinned at the scene. All were distracted, and it was the perfect opportunity for a surprise attack. Still, though, he didn't know the location of-

"Yeah, the nest's here all right," came a voice behind him. "My nose can smell the eggs."

Meowth glanced at Growlithe as he approached and pointed his noise towards the window of another building. "You've confirmed my theory then, canine. Now, go do your prince a favor and fetch them for me. That is what you dogs like to do, yes?"

"Oh, screw off!" Growlithe barked. "Quit patronizing me and do your own dirty work. We're not in Persian anymore, so you can drop the smarmy attitude."

"Yes, yes, I've gotten the lecture before," Meowth muttered, looking down. "I'm afraid you have my hands tied, mutt. Looks like I'll have to prove myself after all."

Growlithe snorted. "Yeah, as if a runt like you-are you insane? Don't jump off the building!"

"I'm a cat, remember?" Meowth said, a wicked grin appearing on his face as his claws extended. "You know how we land."

He jumped down, performing a triple flip before landing on top of the Archeops, who squawked in annoyance.

Samurott and Lilligant looked up in surprise at Meowth wrapping a hand around Archeops' neck. With a hiss, he ripped his sharp claws through the prehistoric bird's neck, short circuiting it instantly. As the Archeops collapsed, Meowth leaped off the bird and _through_ a nearby window, shattering the glass.

Rattata broke free of the Archen holding him down and let out a few deep breaths. "Whoa. Uh…I m-mean, the top percentage of Rattata is not impressed. He can totally do that too."

"Save it, rodent," Lilligant muttered. She looked up at the broken window. "If Plant Girl was a guessing girl…."

Without finishing her sentence, she darted towards it. Samurott and Rattata exchanged a glance before sprinting after her. Unbeknownst to them, however, a massive Pokemon turned the corner of a block, knocking Komala and Chandelure out of its path.

Lilligant managed to climb up the building and dive after Meowth, but before Rattata and Samurott could close in the massive Pokemon, an Omastar slid between them, throwing a tendril that slapped Samurott into a beauty salon.

"God, is that you?" Rattata whispered, before Omastar blasted him with a hydro pump.

 **0000**

" **Stupid cat," Growlithe grumbled. "I hate cats."**

 **0000**

"Aw man," Rockruff mumbled as a trio of Archen advanced on him and Bellosom. "C-can you fight?"

"Fighting's not the only answer to a problem, Rockruff," Bellosom said with a wide smile. "There are many ways to diffuse a situation."

He reached into his skirt and pulled out his ukulele. "Have any requests?"

"Ooh, ooh, I have one!" Rockruff whimpered.

"Shh," Bellosom said. "Now, let's all play a tune together." He began to strum his ukulele.

The Archen all glanced at each other, bemused. Rockruff began to grow nervous, but Bellosom played well. Eventually, the birds' heads began to droop, and eventually they all flopped, shut down.

"Wow!" Rockruff said with a bark. "You knew that music shuts the animatronics down?"

"What, no!" Bellosom shouted. He kicked at the now motionless Archen. "Wake up! Our jam session isn't over!'

"Ow!" Chandelure shouted as Omastar bashed her repeatedly into the wall. "Can you play for him now? Because I think I'm losing brain cells!"

"Hello, God? It's me, Pidgey," Rattata mumbled, trapped under the ice. "Why does everything suck?"

"Are you…doing okay, man?" Komala asked. "Wait, did you say Pidgey?"

"Yeah…oh hold on man, have to get back into character really quick! One, two,.hwarrrgh!"

With a massive jolt of effort, Rattata broke through the ice, taking a few deep breaths. For a moment, he looked in pain, but a second later he was boastful again, flexing his nonexistent muscles.

"I'll take care of this Omastar lickity split!" He shouted, and Omastar turned to glare at him. Komala gulped.

"Um…maybe that's not a good idea," the koala said.

"Nonsense!" Rattata shouted. "The top percentage of Rattata never backs down from a challenge!"

 **0000**

" **Rattata gives me a headache," Komala groaned, rubbing his head. "Can I vote him off, yet?"**

 **0000**

Sawk grinned, folding his arms at Tyrantrum's nest. "Found you."

There were four eggs in there, all bigger than Sawk's head. He moved forward but paused when a shadow moved behind him.

"Gengar," Sawk said, turning around. "Is that you?"

"Impressive peripheral vision," Gengar said, appearing into view. He was still carrying Feebas' fish bowl. "I have to admit it; I've been following you. Look though, one for each of us."

Sawk sized them up with narrowed eyes. "…Gengar, you take one. Feebas, you're not getting an egg."

Gengar's eyebrow rose. "I'm sorry?"

"She's a weakling," Sawk said. "I won't work with a liability."

"Rude!" Feebas shouted.

"Don't get greedy, Sawk," Gengar warned. "You've won the challenge if you tread carefully."

"Afraid not," Sawk said, folding his arms. "To get her an egg you'll need to go through me."

"C'mon, Gengar, let's just go," Feebas pleaded. "This isn't worth it."

"Sorry Feebas," Gengar said with a sheepish smile, before fixing Sawk with a deadly glare. "I'm afraid my pride won't allow that. You're getting an egg."

He threw a shadow ball that Sawk deflected with ease. The fighting type got into a fighting stance.

"You'll regret attempting physical force against me," Sawk said in a low voice. "Deal's off. Neither of you are getting an egg now."

"You got greedy, Sawk," Gengar said, forming two more shadow balls in his hands. "Now suffer the consequences!"

The two Pokemon rushed at each other, launching attacks at the same time as Feebas looked on in horror.

 **0000**

" **I love fighting," Sawk said with a cold smile. "It's how we Pokemon communicate with each other. Gengar can act as high and mighty as he wants, but when it comes down to it, he's still a Pokemon."**

 **0000**

"I don't like this plan," Beedrill said, throwing Butterfree a concerned look. "You're weak to ice attacks, and I'm not sure that Shellder and Heliolisk can break Furret out of the ice."

"Of course, they can't," Butterfree said, rolling his eyes. "I'm just giving them something to do until the fight's over. You're poking holes in the ice to set him free when the battle is over."

"Why not just have them fight with you and have me free Furret?" Beedrill asked.

"Because you're a tough fighter, and they're insecure marshmallows?" Butterfree asked sarcastically. "Look, just stop questioning my methods, alright?"

"Whatever you say," Beedrill said, rolling his eyes.

The two brothers descended on Aurorous in perfect sync, twirling around each other with the grace of two Pokemon that had fought together for years. Beedrill was the brute force, landing vicious strikes on Aurorous while Butterfree danced in the air, waving his wings to unleash a sleep powder on the dinosaur.

Unfortunately, Aurorous was smarter than she looked. She slapped Beedrill to the side with her tail, before shooting an aurora beam up at Butterfree. Both Pokemon were struck by attacks, and Aurorous collapsed on its knees at the same time as Butterfree tumbled through the air.

Diving, Beedrill caught his brother before he hit the ground. The bug type let out a few weak coughs.

"Couldn't you have held him off for longer?" Butterfree managed to cough out; the ice attack succeeded in knocking the wind out of him, and he was gasping for breath.

"She's smart," Beedrill said, glaring at the sleeping animatronic. "She knew which of us was the real threat to her and acted accordingly."

"Ugh…how's progress with freeing Furret?" Butterfree mumbled.

"Ow! Ow! Stop! Ow!" Shellder cried, as Heliolisk repeatedly bashed him into the ice that pinned Furret to the building wall. "You're not making any progress and I'm going to have a concussion!"

"Oh, he's making progress," Furret said. "See that little crack over there?"

"Guys, please," Beedrill said, stumbling to his feet. "I'll get Furret on his feet. You two handle Aurorous."

"Are you crazy?" Butterfree hissed, trying to rise and failing. "They don't stand a chance!"

"Well, neither did we," Beedrill snapped. "They have unique abilities, what do we have to lose?"

"Um…well, I think I have an idea," Heliolisk said, turning to face Beedrill.

"Any ideas that don't involve using Shellder as a battering ram?" Beedrill asked.

"Oh…n-no.."

"I have an idea," Shellder muttered. "Heliolisk, I just need you to throw me when I say so."

"You'd better hurry!" Furret shouted. "She's getting up!"

It was true, Aurorous was stirring, glaring sleepily at the Pokemon in her territory.

"Okay, here goes nothing!" Heliolisk said, scampering towards Aurorous and holding his fingers to the sides of his head. "Solar Flare!"

His collar extended, and he almost looked intimidating. A blinding light flashed, and the Aurorous screeched in pain and stumbled around, her eyes blinded.

"Now!" Shellder shouted, as Heliolisk ran forward. "Throw me between her legs!"

"And throw me between her legs afterwards!" Furret said with a wink.

"Not a good time, Furret!" Beedrill snarled as he stabbed a stinger into the ice.

With a shout of effort, Heliolisk chucked Shellder, and the water type slid between Aurorous's legs. He scooped up all five eggs with his tongue, before rolling out of range of Aurorous's stomping feet.

"Now! Let's scram!" Shellder shouted.

Beedrill ripped Furret free from the ice and pushed him off to a run, before helping drag Butterfree away. The five Pokemon escaped as the Aurorous slammed into a building in her rampage.

"See, bro?" Beedrill said, nudging Butterfree. "Not so bad to have them around, was it?"

"Alright, alright," Butterfree admitted, rolling his eyes. "I can admit when I'm wrong."

 **0000**

" **Dude, I'm just like Shuckle!" Shellder shouted, hopping up and down. "Everyone will think I'm so cool after this!"**

 **0000**

" **I hope I wasn't too scary," Heliolisk said with a blush.**

 **0000**

"I hate running," Throh groaned, collapsing on his side. "We got away, right?"

"I think so," Kirlia said. "Flygon and Pawniard haven't caught up yet though."

"Well, rest in peace them, then," Mawile said, hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath. "Give their sacrifice meaning or whatever."

"Look, we probably wouldn't have had enough eggs to go around anyway, so this is probably for the best," Absol said. "Anyway, we should probably get egg hunting, y'all."

"Yeah, you all can screw off," Liepard muttered. "I'm going my own way."

She slouched off, much to Absol's annoyance.

"What are you doing, Kirlia?" Mawile asked. Kirlia was closing her eyes, apparently concentrating hard.

An image of the block they had just escaped appeared in front of the Pokemon much to their surprise. Slowly the view began to change to different sections of the city.

"Thanks to my horns, I can create mirages," Kirlia explained, not opening her eyes. "These are the places we've passed that I can remember. See if you all notice any nests."

"Whoa, hey, there's something!" Absol said, pointing. "Over in that backstreet alley. Man, these guys put their nests in some weird ass places."

"We'd better get going then," Throh said. "Aww man, I'm so excited."

 **0000**

" **I'm NOT excited!" Throh shouted, rubbing his head. "All these guys have useful skills and abilities! I literally have nothing! How am I supposed to keep up with them?"**

 **0000**

A massive Kabutops was squatting over his nest, which was situated near a dumpster. It glared down the street, as if daring anyone to attack. What he didn't see, however, was Ariados slowly descending on her web, slowly wrapping her legs around the single egg in his nest. Before she could lift it up though, something snapped the string holding her up, and she collapsed on her face.

"Er… hello…" Ariados said, smiling sheepishly at the Kabutops as he turned to glare at her. "Um…fancy a cup of tea?"

The Kabutops roared and stabbed a blade down, chasing the poor spider as she scuttled away as fast as her legs could carry her.

"Mwehehehe!" Mimikyu cackled as she appeared behind the dumpster. "The fool fell for it. Now this egg is for me and me alone!"

"Ooh, free egg," said Liepard, taking notice of the unattended egg. "Out of the way, ghostly spaz. I'm taking this."

"You dare challenge me?" Mimikyu hissed. Her tail turned into a shadowy claw. "You won't live to tell the tale."

"Yeah, because I'll have ended myself after hearing five more minutes of your obnoxious voice," Liepard said with a snarl. "Seriously, it's so screechy, how do you stand it?"

With a roar, an aggravated Mimikyu launched herself at Liepard, who yowled and responded in kind. As they fought, Rattata slammed into the dumpster with a yelp.

"Wow," Rattata said, pushing himself out and tossing a banana aside. "That Omastar can sure put up a fight. I can't wait for the rematch."

He shook himself off and nudged the egg. "Whoa! Score! This is the best challenge ever!"

Mimikyu and Liepard exchanged shocked looks as Rattata took flight, the egg safely wedged between his feet.

A Bulbasaur jot something down in a notebook before abruptly shutting it and turning away. "Thinking about that is an editing nightmare I don't wanna get into."

"Did…that Rattata just fly?" Liepard asked.

Mimikyu responded by slugging her in the face. "Sucker punch!"

"Ow, stop that!"

0000

"We're here!" Flygon called as he and Noivern touched the ground in front of Victini, with Pawniard sliding off Noivern's back. They had found the legendary Pokemon in a park close to the city set.

"All of you have eggs?" Victini asked, checking to confirm. "Then welcome to the Unique Umbreons! Only seventeen spots remaining!"

"We're here as well!" Butterfree gasped, flopping down and taking a few deep breaths. Beedrill, Heliolisk, Furret, and Shellder were with him.

"Wow, good job!" Victini said. "Now there are only twelve spots remaining. Why not greet your new teammates?"

Noivern looked at the likes of Heliolisk and Shellder, not very impressed, but Butterfree seemed satisfied with his new allies.

"Should be fine," Butterfree said, shaking Flygon's hand. "Let's make this the best team this sorry show has ever seen."

"Hey!" Victini groaned, upset.

"Sure thing," Flygon said with a smile.

0000

Lilligant and Meowth danced around each other, trading strikes and blows. Meowth aimed vicious slashes with his claws, but Lilligant dodged with practiced skill.

"You're fast," Lilligant noted. "But not fast enough."

Performing a quick dance, she sent of petals that overwhelmed the cat and sent him tumbling down the hallway. Lilligant sprinted in the other direction, eyeing the nest at the end of the hallway…

"Fool!" Meowth hissed, ripping the petals to shreds and sprinting after Lilligant. "Don't you dare turn your back on me."

Lilligant turned, narrowing her eyes, before shooting an energy ball from her hands. Meowth dove to the side, leaping and climbing on the side of the wall, before launching himself at Lilligant and tackling her. The heiress and the prince scratched and kicked, before a sudden tremor shook the room.

A Rampardos slammed through the stairway, knocking the door off its hinges. Meowth and Lilligant stared in horror as it rushed at them, aiming a vicious headbutt.

They made to move, but with a crash Popplio tumbled out of the window, landing safely on his feet. Giving a wink and a bow, the sea lion shot out a massive bubble that bounced Rampardos back, and the prehistoric Pokemon crashed through a wall.

"Thank you for the help, Jester," Meowth said, looking a little suspicious. "But how did you know where to find us?"

"You guys were really loud," Popplio said with a giggle. "How could I _not_ find you? Anyway, there are three eggs in that nest, so stop fighting, okay?"

"Plant Girl does not like to share," Lilligant said, glowing with green energy.

"Trust me heiress, neither do I," Meowth said, pointing at the Rampardos. "But I fear a truce must be made for now."

"Uh…not only that, but like…everyone is waiting outside to mob you guys the second you leave with the eggs," Popplio said. "Just wanted to warn you."

Lilligant folded her arms. "Let's escape in one of your bubbles. We'll float away."

"But we're still sitting ducks, and Samurott is clearly no slouch," Meowth said, stroking his head. A smile slowly formed on his face. "Ooh, I have an idea…"

 **0000**

" **Meowth is a suitable suitor and mate," Lilligant said, folding her arms. "Impressive combat abilities, grasp of strategy, noble blood, and soft, fluffy fur."**

 **She smiled. "He will have to be conditioned, but soon he will make Plant Girl very happy."**

 **0000**

" **Lilligant is capable of holding her own against me in combat," Meowth said with a respectful nod. "It's good to see that victory won't be handed to me on a silver platter."**

" **But I will win," Meowth said with a low hiss. "I fight for the people of Persian. With their hearts on my side, I WILL destroy the competition."**

 **0000**

Samurott took a deep breath as he ripped his two swords out of Omastar's destroyed body. Wiping some sweat off his brow, he turned to his allies, who were all aiming attacks at the hotel.

"Get into position, Samurott," Growlithe barked. "As soon as Meowth and Lilligant show up with the eggs we're blowing them away."

"Wait so then…how are we going to decide who gets the eggs?" Komala asked Rockruff, who shrugged.

A sudden rumbling shook the hotel. Before anyone could move, a Rampardos burst out, charging down the Pokemon as a giant bubble containing Popplio, Lilligant, and Meowth.

"Gah! Run!" Chandelure shrieked. Samurott threw his blades forward but Rampardos slammed him backwards.

"Clearly one of my better plans, if I do say so myself," Meowth said with a chuckle. "That should get them off our backs."

"Can you steer this thing, Popplio?" Lilligant asked.

"Nope!" Popplio said.

 **0000**

 **Meowth's eyes were bloodshot. "We were in that bubble longer than I'd like to admit."**

 **0000**

"Okay, so we need to get past a Bastiodon," Mawile whispered. They were lying low on a tall building, watching the massive steel type parole the streets.

"Can you mess him up with your mind?" Absol asked, poking Kirlia. "Do that lil' psychic thing you do?"

"Unlikely," Kirlia admitted. "Steel types resist my powers. I'd need to get closer."

"Um…guys?" Throh asked suddenly. "What's poking my shoulder? Is that you, Mawile?"

"What, dude, no!" Mawile shouted. "That's…um…those are…tendrils…"

"I have a feeling I don't want to turn around," Absol groaned.

A Cradily stared at them with creepy yellow eyes, the pink tentacles elongating into tendrils. They launched themselves forward at the Pokemon.

Mawile and Throh managed to avoid them, but Kirlia and Absol were trapped. The Cradily lifted them in the air.

"Damn it, how the hell are we supposed to fight this thing, Thr-Throh?" Mawile asked, turning around to look. "Where did you go?"

Throh was shrieking and sprinting away in the opposite direction. Mawile groaned and slapped her face with a hand.

 **0000**

" **Geez, you'd think a beefcake like him would grow more of a spine," Mawile said, rolling her eyes. "He left me all alone!"**

 **0000**

" **This game isn't worth it," Throh whimpered, curling into fetal position. "I joined this for the tap dancing, not this scary stuff!"**

 **0000**

Sawk threw punches and kicks that Gengar attempted to dodge, the fighting type showing a clear advantage in close combat. Feebas watched their fight in horrified fascination, until Gengar muttered in frustration and dove into a shadow.

Sawk shifted, from offense to defense in one fluid motion. "Parlor tricks don't work on me, Gengar. If you want to defeat me, do it as a man!"

Gengar's response was oddly flanged and reverberated around the room. "A man must be prepared to anything for his ideals. Honor is not in the means, but the message!"

Portals opened around Sawk, unleashing massive ethereal fists that Sawk struggled to dodge and block. He stayed calm, dodging and deflecting, biding his time until the real Gengar-

Gengar reappeared behind one of his shadowy fists, gliding through the air and striking just when Sawk's back was turned.

Sawk caught the ghost's hand before he could make contact and flung him over the construction area. Gengar's head slammed against a forklift and crumpled.

Sawk loomed, and Feebas gulped. Gengar wasn't getting up. She couldn't watch her first friend be beaten to a pulp!

"FEEBAS THE STRONGEST THERE IS!" Feebas shrieked, leaping at Sawk to distract him, slapping him a few times with her tail. "FEEBAS SMASH!"

"Ow, hey!" Sawk barked, batting her away. He turned, but Gengar had already rolled to his feet.

"Hypnosis!" Gengar said, snapping his fingers. A psychic blast enveloped Sawk and sent him sprawling to the floor. Soon, he was snoring.

"You're okay?" Feebas asked, as Gengar tossed her back into her fishbowl. "You looked really hurt."

"I was playing dead," Gengar chuckled, limping over to Sawk. "I knew that it was the only chance after the damage I had taken, but it was a risky move. Thanks to you, the risk was gone."

Gengar put his hand on Sawk's chest, and the fighting type gasped and shuddered in his sleep. The dream eater surged back into Gengar, restoring his health.

"It's a shame," he said, gesturing to the eggs. "There was surely enough for everyone. Remember not to stick your hand in the pickle jar and grab too much, Feebas, because you won't be able to pull it out again."

Feebas blinked. "But I don't like pickles."

"No, you're missing the-you know what, never mind," Gengar deadpanned. "Let's just grab our eggs and be on our way."

"Not so fast," came a grouchy voice. Gengar looked up to see Toucannon perched on a construction tower. Magmar was kneeling next to him. "Sawk made arrangements on who to split the eggs with, and it sure as hell wasn't you."

Magmar shot out a stream of fire that Gengar leaped back to avoid. The fire type launched after him, his fist enclosed in fire. Toucannon flew after him, aiming swipes with his wings.

"This is just dandy," Gengar hissed, pushing the toucan away before taking a vicious hit from Magmar. Gengar yowled in pain, shooting out his tongue, but Magmar leapt back to avoid it.

Out of the corner of his eye, Gengar saw someone sneak up from behind, and he spun. "Hypnosis!"

"Sorry pal," Weavile said with a smirk as the psychic attack dissipated against his body. "I'm a dark type."

He followed up with a vicious night slash that sent Gengar sprawling. Weavile and Magmar pounded the ghost type with scary synonymity.

0000

"Well, there are the eggs," Castform said, staring down at them with binoculars he had designed himself. "Annoying crowd, though."

"Yes, I'm afraid if we went down there our chances of defeat would be three thousand seven hundred and twenty to one," Porgyon replied, eyeing the deadly blows that Weavile and Magmar dealt.

"Never tell me the odds!" Castform growled. "Besides, we're not going down there. Just sharp shoot from up here and I'll snatch them up while everyone's distracted!"

Porygon huffed. "I assure you, I was not designed for combat-"

"Nullifying safety mode," Castform barked in response. "Activate code 'C'."

"Routine verified!" Porgyon said, his eyes turning into targets. "Heat signatures locked!"

Castform snickered. "Open fire then, Robot! Blow them to smithereens!"

"Order confirmed!"

 **0000**

" **Yeah, uh, I 'improved' Porygon during that bus ride," Castform said, adjusting one of his metal arms. "You know, deleted viruses, downloaded a couple updates, typical sort of stuff."**

 **He looked up at the camera, raising an eyebrow. "What?"**

 **0000**

"Rockin' around, the Christmas tree~!" Emolga sang as she twirled a figure eight around the attacking Aerodactyl. Crobat tried to drown her out as he spun around one of their bite attacks.

"Can you shut up, please!" Crobat snapped. "God, why do you have to be cheery _all_ the time?"

"Well, to be fair, I'd probably be screaming in this situation if I were someone else," Emolga said with a shrug. "Is that preferable?"

"Look-we may as well work together, because those Aerodactyl are close to wiping us out," Crobat snapped.

"Wow, you want to work together?" Emolga asked, lighting up. "Has hell frozen over?"

"Just-do you know volt switch?" Crobat asked. "Because I have an idea."

"Yeah," Emolga said, ducking under a volley of rocks. "What's the plan, Stan?"

"Get behind me," Crobat said, splitting into multiple copies of himself. The Aerodactyl were confused by the double team, and the distraction allowed Crobat to drag Emolga away.

Getting over their confusion, the Aerodactyl struck the copies of Crobat, destroying them easily. When all were destroyed, they gave each other odd looks. Where had they gone?

The question of was answered by Crobat slamming into one, shrieking "U-turn!", before flying back. Emolga flew in to rebound, blasting the poor pterodactyl with a volt switch.

They took turns attacking and retreating the two Aerodactyl, causing more and more rapid damage.

 **0000**

" **I think I'm growing on him!" Emolga giggled.**

 **0000**

" **Alright, she's not an idiot," Crobat admitted. "But she's still super obnoxious, so I'm doing away with her as soon as possible."**

 **0000**

"Welcome to the Unique Umbreons!" Victini said, clapping his hands. Lilligant high fived Popplio, but Meowth didn't look like he wanted to be touched.

"So," Meowth said, folding his arms. "How many slots left in our team?"

"Nine left," Victini announced. "Ooh, and it looks like a couple more might be on the way."

"Ahhhhh!" Mawile shouted, Kecleon at her side. They were sprinting down the park, being chased by the Bastiodon and the Cradily. Mawile was cradling an egg was under her arm. "Throh, I hate you!"

"Ooh will Mawile be your teammate?" Victini asked. "Or will Kecleon find a way to snatch the egg from her? Will their asses be kicked? Place your bets!"

"Oh, they're dead," Meowth said, filing his nails and not paying much attention to the scene unfolding.

"Screw this!" Kecleon shouted, pulling out her warp orb. "I hate using my own wares, but this time it's worth it!"

She chucked the ball in a different direction and teleported away, leaving Mawile alone. She gulped and sprinted for Victini but tripped over her dress and fell flat on her face.

"Ah shit," Mawile hissed, rubbing her leg. "This is not the way I thought I would go!"

"Don't worry, fellow competitor! We will not fall today!"

Rattata fell from the sky, screaming loudly. He slammed his head into Bastiodon's, yelping in pain as the impact sent him flying.

 **0000**

"… **Who the hell tries to headbutt a Bastiodon?" Mawile said, puzzled. "My…hero?"**

 **0000**

"Ow…hey, what the hell!" Weavile yelped, trying to avoid the blasts of energy sent his way. "Stop shooting me, asshole!"

Gengar snarled, using Porgyon's distraction to strike back, throwing a shadow punch that sent Magmar sprawling.

"Wake up," Toucannon muttered, slapping Sawk. The fighting type rose, blinking the sleepiness away.

"I uh….what's happening?" The fighting type asked, rubbing the back of his head.

"Gengar's proven himself to be stronger than expected, and we're being sniped by Porygon for some reason," Toucannon replied, fixing Sawk with a cool stare. "I don't suppose you'd fancy being my meat shield?"

Sawk's quip was cut off by a weather ball exploding in front of them, sending the still disoriented Sawk flying and forcing Toucannon to take flight to avoid its impact. Cackling like a maniac, Castform snatched up two eggs and took flight again before either could get to their feet.

"Damn it!" Sawk growled. "So much for our alliance. There are only two eggs left."

"Pardon me a moment," Toucannon said, stepping forward, his massive beak glowing with intense power. He approached the fighting trio.

"Toucannon, what?" Magmar muttered, still dazed from Gengar's strike.

Weavile gaped. "Oh shit!"

"Bye boys," Toucannon drawled, and his beak exploded. The impact sent the three Pokemon flying and tipped poor Feebas's bowl over.

Toucannon returned to Sawk's side, where the fighting type was staring at the bird in awe. "Well, that's taken care of. Go on then, there are two eggs for us to take."

 **0000**

" **Toucannon is intimidating both physically and mentally," Sawk said with a small smile. "He'll be an interesting person to work with, that's for sure."**

 **0000**

" **Did I have a particular reason for picking Sawk over Magmar and Weavile?" Toucannon asked, pointing at himself. "No, he was just closer to me."**

 **0000**

"Volt switch!"

"U-Turn!"

"Volt Switch!"

"U-Turn!"

The Aerodactyl exploded into bits and pieces, while Emolga and Crobat flew back safely in the air.

"Hell yeah!" Emolga shrieked. "Aw dude, we're such an awesome team."

"Yeah, yeah," Crobat said, rolling his eyes, but a small smile was on his face. "Let's just grab the eggs and get out of here."

"You know what this means, right?" Emolga said, wiggling her eyebrows. "We're going to be teammates!"

"Good, that just means it'll be easier for me to vote you off," Crobat said, scooping up an egg.

0000

"Rattata, are you okay!?" Victini shouted. "Please don't sue us, it goes right out of my pocket!"

"Yeah," Mawile said, glancing back as Cradily approached. "Maybe walk it off and-"

"Ha! I see that it is time to reveal my true form!" Rattata said. He ripped off his mask and body suit to reveal himself as Pidgey. "The prodigy returns!"

Victini gaped. "Wh-what? How are y-you-?"

"Isn't that the guy from season one?" Shellder whispered. Popplio shrugged.

"Now, prepare to fall, you fool!" Pidgey said, pulling a sword seemingly out of nowhere. He rushed at Bastiodon, before switching and landing a strike on Cradily, slicing off the green Pokemon's head.

"That…worked?" Victini whispered, clutching his head in exhaustion.

"Hey! It worked!" Pidgey shouted. "Alright, Bastiodon, it's YOUR TURN-"

Bastiodon responded by headbutting the poor bird so hard he flew into Mawile, bowling them both to where Victini was standing.

"Well..since….you're technically still holding your eggs, you're both….on the winning team…" Victini said, still in a state of shock. "Only…only seven slots remaining."

"Make that five!" came a shout. Crobat and Emolga descended, tossing their eggs to Victini. "We better have made it."

"Oh, you have," Victini grumbled, as Emolga high fived Mawile. "Four spots."

Toucannon and Sawk arrived next, looking like they had all the time in the world, though they had to run around an angry Bastiodon. Victini counted them down.

"Ah, here we are!" Castform said, floating in the air next to Porgyon. "Only one obstacle left!"

"Castform, I must advise you that we stand very little chance against a Pokemon of that size and stature," Porygon chided. "Perhaps we should fly around…"

"Oh right, I didn't explain phase two of the plan," Castform said, punching an open fist. "We have a third ally!"

A car honked, before driving into view, plowing through sets and props, Klefki at the wheel. He giggled madly as he accelerated towards an unsuspecting Bastiodon.

"Wait… is THAT MY CAR!" Victini shrieked. "DUDE NO!"

The car smashed into Bastiodon, dragging the steel type away with it, giving Castform and Porgyon enough time to sprint over to Victini's side.

"Well, I think it's fair to say we made it," Castform said with a grin.

"MY BABY!" Victini shrieked again, floating over to the wrecked vehicle and completely ignoring the doctor.

"Ugh…so worth it," Klefki mumbled, floating out of the car in a daze, but Victini grabbed and threw him away, falling to his knees at the sight of this ruined car.

"So uh….where's my egg?" Klefki said, poking Castform.

"Oh yeah," the cloud Pokemon said. "Yeah no, we totally forgot to grab you one."

"Aww man," Klefki said, disappointed. "Do you want your car keys back, dude?"

"N-no…." Victini mumbled. "No need for them now."

"Are…are you crying?" Emolga asked.

"NO!" Victini snarled, grabbing a megaphone while desperately trying to hold back tears. "The following campers are now official members of the Unique Umbreons! Porygon, Beedrill, Emolga, Castform, Toucannon, ergh…Pidgey, Noivern, Shellder, Butterfree, Sawk, Popplio, Heliolisk, Crobat, Furret, Mawile, Pawniard, Flygon, Lilligant, and Meowth!"

The winning team cheered, with Beedrill high fiving Castform, Emolga hugging Mawile, and Flygon nodding his approval.

"The second-place team, as in, everyone who has not gotten an egg-you will be the Sucky Shuckles!" Victini announced. "Feebas, Klefki, Weavile, Absol, Liepard, Komala, Chandelure, Magmar, Kirlia, Mimikyu, Ariados, Throh, Gengar, Kecleon, Samurott, Growlithe, Rockruff, and Bellosom!"

The response to that wasn't very enthusiastic.

"The challenge is over, so we'll tour your sleeping trailers and get some dinner," Victini said. "The Umbreons get dibs on the evening special. Don't pack in yet though, because after dinner we're having our first ever elimination ceremony. Sucky Shuckles, that's your debut!"

 **0000**

" **I didn't do so well," Throh mumbled. "I think I might be the one to go home. But uh…hey, Feebas is stuck in a fish bowl, so maybe I stand a chance at staying!"**

 **0000**

" **I'm practically the textbook definition for elimination fodder," Feebas said glumly. "Can't wait to break the news to my parents when I get home."**

 **0000**

" **I did so good, today!" Pidgey said, writing in his diary. "I manage to actually do some damage before getting knocked on my butt! Baby steps!"**

 **He then noticed that the camera was rolling. "Uh, I mean of course I did well. I am the great and powerful Pidgey after all."**

 **0000**

"This…actually isn't so bad," Butterfree said, peeking into the boys' trailer. "I was expecting a hole in the ground, considering season one."

"Absolute paradise next to prison," Beedrill said, flying up and resting comfortably on one of the top bunks.

"So, um…who do you think is going to be voted off today?" Heliolisk asked.

"Well, there's a wide range of options," Butterfree said. "Feebas is worthless, Throh ditched his team, and Mimikyu seems like a genuine psychopath, so…"

"Oh, Throh's goin' home!" Absol said, poking her head in the door. "Kirlia and I are making sure of it."

"GAH! THIS IS THE BOY'S TRAILER! GET OUT!" Shellder shrieked, diving under his newly made covers.

"Oh, grow a pair, already," Absol said, rolling her eyes.

"That's a little harsh to Throh though, isn't it?" Flygon asked. "It was a pretty scary first challenge. You can't blame a guy for freaking out."

"It wasn't just the challenge though," Absol said. "Gengar told me he'd caught him scheming a way to sabotage Feebas so she'd get booted out first. He's a coward, and this team is better off without him!"

"If you say so," Flygon said with a puzzled look. "Though he never really seemed like the type to do that to me."

"People wear masks in this game, Flygon," Butterfree said with a sigh. "Better you learn that now."

"And how the hell would you know that?" Flygon asked. "This is the first episode, what experience could you possibly have?"

"He spent weeks on his ass watching tv, so now he thinks he's an expert," Beedrill said with a snicker. "He forgot to feed himself."

"I-I was studying!" Butterfree hissed, but everyone was already laughing at him.

 **0000**

" **I'm not as good at reading emotions as Gardevoir, but I can definitely tell that Throh has something he wants to keep hidden," Kirlia said. "I'm having a hard time reading Gengar's emotions, but he seems genuinely concerned about Feebas. He's also been very outgoing and kind. I think we can trust him."**

 **0000**

" **Do we really need to vote someone to leave?" Bellosom asked as he strummed his ukulele. "But like…what if we all grow and change? Isn't kicking them off before they get a chance to do so kinda cruel? I don't know if I agree with ideology behind this type of game."**

 **0000**

"Wow, this food is delicious!" Komala said, more energetic then the other Pokemon had ever seen. He was devouring his food, a well-prepared eucalyptus dish, before settling down in his seat with a glazed expression. Soon he was yawning.

"How do you do that?" Ariados asked with a curious smile. "Go from hyper to exhausted so quickly?"

"T-that would be the eucalyptus," Komala said with another long yawn. "Eucalyptus is poisonous, I think, but my body is good at breaking it down. Of course, it slows me down a lot."

"Oh, and eucalyptus is the only think you can eat?" Ariados asked, raising an eyebrow.

Komala blinked. "Why would you think that?"

Kirlia coughed. "Er…excuse me, I'm not always the greatest at initiating conversation, but I think it's time we thought of someone to vote for."

"Oh? And you had an idea?" Ariados asked.

"Well, I was thinking that-"

"PIDGEY AND KLEFKI! WE NEED YOU TWO DOWN AT THE AWARDS STADIUM RIGHT NOW!"

"Yes!" Pidgey shouted, standing up and slamming a talon on the table. "My next challenge approaches!"

"Uh-oh, it's probably about the car," Klefki mumbled.

They left the cafeteria with their teams staring after them, some concerned and some just plain weirded out.

 **0000**

" **Yup, we're a weird bunch," Weavile said with a grin. "Honestly, I probably should've expected it."**

 **0000**

"Whoa, it's like an awards show!" Klefki whispered, gazing at the massive ceremony. "Do you think we got an Oscar?"

"Whose Oscar and how strong is he?" Pidgey asked, whipping his head around. "Did he insult me? I'll kick his ass!"

"You two are in a lot of trouble," Victini hissed. "One of you wrecked my car, and the other forged the invitation to compete in the season! HOW DID YOU EVEN MANAGE THAT!"

"Ninjask knows a guy," Pidgey said with a smile. "He also said something…for old time's sake? I don't remember exactly what he said, he was laughing through it the whole time-"

"DAMN YOU NINJASK! EVEN NOW YOU HAUNT ME!" Victini roared, the V on his head igniting.

"Okay, so I was planning on asking you to meet up for coffee later and reminisce on old times," Pidgey said slowly. "But right now, I get the sense that you're maybe not very happy to see me."

"OF COURSE I'M NOT HAPPY TO SEE YOU!" Victini hissed. "YOU GODDAMN BANANA! EVERYONE WATCHING THE SHOW HATED YOUR GUTS LAST SEASON, AND NOW YOU'RE BACK? DAMMIT, I COULD HAVE GOTTEN ZORUA AGAIN! EVERYONE LOVES ZORUA!"

"Um. I'm just gonna go," Klefki mumbled.

"AND YOU!" Victini hissed, wheeling on the keychain. "That car was a rental! I don't get another one of those!"

"Sorry, it's a medical condition," Klefki said, shying away from the furious host's gaze. "I can't just not steal keys, honest!"

Victini took a deep breath to calm himself down. "I know, and technically I signed papers accepting that I take responsibility for it, and you could sue me if I kick you off the show."

Victini turned and grinned a wicked grin at Pidgey. "YOU on the other hand…"

"Aww what?" Pidgey asked. "I'm being kicked off the show?"

"You don't GET to act disappointed!" Victini snarled. "What we're going to do is kick you off, and then edit the show to take you out of there so nobody watching the show has to witness your buffoonery again!"

Before he could say more, his phone began to ring. "Sorry, I have to take this, but I'll be back in a few so don't you dare go anywhere."

Klefki giggled as Victini walked away. "Dude, you're a fucking maniac. I like you."

"Right back at you, Jingles!" Pidgey said, shaking one of Klefki's keys. "Knocked down a giant Bastiodon with the host's car? We should be friends."

"Hello? This is Victini speaking," Victini said into his phone. "I'm sorry, but I have a show to host, so I don't really have time to-"

" _What the hell do you think you're doing right now, Victini? This isn't a rhetorical question."_

"Oh, s-sir!" Victini gulped. "It's you! Uh…how are the wife and kids? I didn't know you were calling today-"

" _Quit stalling. Answer me why you thought in your wildest dreams it was okay to eliminate Pidgey."_

Victini gaped. "S-sir? He cheated to get in, and everyone watching the show hates him! Our show will plummet in ratings and credibility!"

" _You think I give a damn?"_ the voice snapped. " _Yes, the audience hates Pidgey, but the effect of him here will be huge! Everyone will tune in on this show to watch. You're throwing away money right now."_

"But sir, if the show's quality is degraded-"

" _I don't give a damn what you think quality is. Or likability. What matters in show business, my area of expertise, is publicity. This will go public, and Total Pokkemon Action will go down in history. The work we do feeds on controversy and recognition, not a fucking critic's review score."_

Victini clenched a fist. "Sir, I hold my show to a certain standard, and I will not allow it to be-"

" _Your show?"_

Victini went green. "N-no, that's not what I meant. I-I just…"

" _I don't need to show you the paperwork again, do I Victini? This is my show now, and you work under me. I feel like we've had this conversation before."_

"Y-yes sir, we have."

" _I don't like repeating myself, Victini. I'm sure I've reminded you how easy it is to get a replacement host? Someone smarter, funnier, more charismatic? Why didn't I fire you and get someone more competent, Victini?"_

"B-because you took pity on-"

" _Because I took pity on you, yes, correct. You don't fit in with the other legends, do you? This show was all you had in your name. I didn't want to take that away from you, did I?"_

"No sir," Victini said in a whisper. "And I'm very grateful to you, sir."

" _But it would be so easy to take it all away. I don't want to, of course. But every conversation like this we have, I get pushed a little closer. Next time you want to do something without my permission, count to ten. If the idea sounds stupid then, it's probably a stupid thing to do."_

"Understood sir," Victini mumbled.

" _Glad you're being reasonable. Keep Pidgey in. Make sure he doesn't leave. Weed out the ones that aren't good on camera, you know, the boring ones. You also know the plants I've had join the show as competitors, right? Toucannon and P-"_

"Yes, of course I know them, sir," Victini said. "I'll make sure they stay in the game."

" _Good. Oh, and make sure that Lilligant girl leaves as well, but not before humiliating her through and through. We're going to make the heiress's decision to compete in my territory a mistake."_

"Yes sir, I understand," Victini said dully.

" _This was a good chat, Victini. Productive and to the point. I hope we never have a conversation like this again."_

 _Click._

Victini took a few deep breaths, before groaning something out in frustration. He flew back to Pidgey and Klefki who looked bored.

"Y-you're free to go," Victini forced out. "Neither of you will be eliminated today."

"Really?" Pidgey asked, his eyes lighting up. "SWEET!"

 **0000**

" **You know, I had suspicions that I have latent psychic powers before, but I think today proved it," Pidgey said with a grin. "Like, I was staring at Victini really hard and thinking 'you will not eliminate me', and it totally worked!"**

 **0000**

" **You know, everyone seems to hate Pidgey, and I get it," Mawile said. "But hey, thanks to him I'm technically on the winning team. Like, without his intervention I'd be on the Shuckles. It's a weird thing to comprehend, but technically I…. owe him one? Man, that tasted weird."**

 **0000**

"Hey guys, and welcome to The Fuzzy Memories of Today, our little side bit for Total Pokkemon Action!" a Tyranitar said, waving up at the camera. He was sitting at a round table, eating a waffle. "We were avid fans of season one, and we're here to announce the winner of the acting aspect of the challenge today."

"You didn't even watch season one," a Drifblim muttered, glaring at Tyranitar. "How you got to be the lead host in this is beyond me."

"It's because my silly behavior makes me way more likable, and you're a little grouchy balloon of hot air," Tyranitar said. "Anyway, today was an intense challenge, full of chaos and betrayal! It was a tough choice, but my co-host and I finally decided that Pidgey's hammy act was what spoke to us the most."

"…What?" Drifblim snapped. "I didn't agree to that at all! No way is Pidgey winning, he's a delusional spaz with no redeeming qualities whatsoever! He's not even acting, he just needs professional help!"

"Okay then, who do _you_ think should be the winner, Smarty Pants!" Tyranitar said, putting his hands on his hips.

"Honestly…nobody," Drifblim said. "Everyone was too worried about winning the challenge to act different then they usually do. It's understandable, because it's the first challenge, but nobody really deserves it this time around."

"Well, there you have it, folks!" Tyranitar said. "Pidgey is the winner!"

Drifblim's eyes widened. "No-!"

0000

"Does Victini seem…disheartened to you?" Furret whispered to Popplio. "Like he's just suffered a vicious blow?"

"I don't know," Popplio said, tapping his chin. "Do you think if I did some tricks it'd make him feel better?"

"Where's Castform?" Emolga asked, nudging Porgyon. "Isn't he always with you?"

"He told me he couldn't care less who was eliminated," Porygon said with an artificial sigh. "The best word I could find on my databanks to describe him is 'idiosyncratic'."

"That's a word I'd use to describe a lot of people on this show," Crobat grumbled.

The eighteen members of the Sucky Shuckles were sitting in the front row seats, staring nervously at Victini, who was facing them on stage wearing a light blue suit. Behind them were the Unique Umbreons in the backseats, where they threw jeers at their fallen opponents behind their backs.

"This season, instead of poke blocks or poffins, we'll be throwing away these VIP stage passes!" Victini said. "Edible VIP stage passes!"

"But…what does it taste like?" Growlithe asked, mystified.

"Like candy, I don't know," Victini said. "Shut up. Now, you've all cast your votes and made your decision. When I call your name, come up to get your passes. If your name isn't called, you'll be boarding our new mode of transportation, the LOOSE-O-SINE, all the way back home. I have thirty-six passes, so one of you will be left wanting!"

Sweat beaded Chandelure's face, and Rockruff let out a little whimper. Magmar tightened his grip on the seat in front of him, unaware that it was beginning to burst out in flames.

 **0000**

" **I vote Feebas, she's useless, and it's the only excuse I need," Weavile said with a snicker.**

 **0000**

" **Throh turned out to be a huge jerk, huh," Rockruff said with a sad whine. "I guess he's the best choice."**

 **0000**

" **I won't vote for anyone," Bellosom said. "It just goes against what I believe in, man."**

 **0000**

"The first pass goes to… Growlithe!"

"Haha sweet," Growlithe barked, jumping up from his chair. "First one of the season!"

"Rockruff, you're good. Followed by… our other pure fire type Magmar, before he burns poor Ariados in her seat. Speaking of, Ariados, hop up here too before you die."

"I-I wasn't nervous!" Magmar muttered. "I just had a lot on my mind today, that's all!"

"Sure, you were," Ariados said with a giggle.

"Dude, can you stop sniffing my butt?" Growlithe asked, turning to look at Rockruff.

"Why would I stop? I love doing that," Rockruff said, wagging his tail.

"Also safe are Weavile, Liepard, and Komala!"

Weavile sauntered up to the stage, flanked by an annoyed Liepard, who couldn't shake a sleeping Komala off her. She ultimately resorted to dragging him up with her.

"Bellosom, Kirlia, and Klefki!"

"Here, I'll take him for you," Kirlia said with a smile as she lifted Komala up with her psychic powers. She smiled and cradled him when he clung to her neck like a baby.

"Next safe we have Gengar, Chandelure, and… HEY! Klefki, don't you dare steal more than one VIP pass!"

Klefki mumbled something about discrimination while Chandelure and Gengar gratefully took their rewards.

"Next up we have Kecleon, no you can't sell your pass to the loser, Samurott, uh…just give me a wave, and Absol!"

Absol high fived Samurott before they went to grab their treats. Kecleon glanced at the remaining three Pokemon behind her.

Mimikyu looked apoplectic, letting out a stream of curses under her breath. Feebas swam around in her anxiety, and Throh had gone very pale.

"You three have all gotten votes!" Victini said, looking down on them with a very serious expression. "Two of you will get to compete on, but one of you is gone for good!

"Fortunately for you Mimikyu, you only got a single vote, so you're safe for the evening."

"Who!? Who was the one who dared attempt to eliminate the likes of me!" Mimikyu growled, yanking away her pass from Victini without even looking at him. "I'll murder you and haunt you in the afterlife!"

"Maybe the one you nearly gave a concussion!" Liepard drawled, pointing to her black eye.

"Oh no," Throh mumbled. "Oh no, oh no, oh no!"

"Aw jeez, this is tense," Feebas said with a nervous laugh. "Can you just shoot me now and get this over with?"

"The final VIP pass goes to," Victini took a deep breath to add a dramatic flair. "…. Feebas."

"Oh, thank Jesus," Feebas whispered, feeling a wave of relief come over her. "I thought I was a goner."

"Aww man..." Throh said sadly. "This blows."

"Sorry Throh, but the votes are final," Victini said. "Maybe if you focused on your other skills, your team would have accepted you more."

"Wait, other skills?" Absol asked. "What the hell is he talking about?"

"Yeah…that's my deep dark secret," Throh mumbled. "I never was a fighter. I've always preferred tap dancing instead."

He did a quick little jig, to the applause of those watching him. He blushed and rubbed the back of his head. "Aww gee."

"Why didn't you tell us before?" Flygon asked with a grin. "You're awesome!"

"I th-thought the skill wouldn't have made me look too good," Throh said forlornly. "Man, I feel so stupid…"

"You don't need to be physically strong to be tough and mean something," Bellosom said with a smile. "Remember that, on the roads you take from now on."

Throh sniffed, rubbing his eyes with his gi. "Thanks guys. This means a lot. I'll be cheering you on from back home. And if there's another season-"

"Ooh, right!" Victini said, snapping a finger. "I just remembered. It might not be over for Throh. You see this season, we'll be doing something new. Right after we hit the merge, the first ten eliminated will compete in a mini tournament, and the winner of that will return to compete for the remainder of Total Pokkemon Action. That's right, you have a second chance at the apple!"

"Yes!" Throh said through his tears, pumping a fist in the air. "I have another chance! Woohoo!"

He sprinted off to the Loose-o-sine, chanting to himself. "I promise to return one day, and I'll be the contestant you strive to compete against!"

The other Pokemon were muttering to themselves, discussing this new game mechanic. Throh waved to them as the Loose-o-sine drove past the film lot and into the night.

"I really thought I was doomed," Feebas said, letting out another deep breath of relief. A shadow loomed over her.

"Don't worry Feebas, I promise to protect you for as long as you need me to, until the day you can stand on your feet by yourself," Gengar said with a smile, picking her up. "Now, let me help you to your pass, all right?"

Feebas smiled, blushing a little. "Thanks, Gengar. Couldn't do it without you."

 **0000**

" **Wonderful, so the shittiest players in the game get a second life," Crobat said, rolling his eyes. "What a waste of time."**

" **I'm not debasing myself to it though," Crobat snapped. "My goal isn't winning, it's about leaving a message and a funeral pyre in my wake. The cards have been dealt, and it's time to see what these other idiots can do with them."**

 **0000**

" **Okay, I'll admit it; Toucannon beat me out this time," Magmar admitted, writing down something furiously in his notebook. "But it won't happen again. I'll build up an alliance and control the vote of my team. That buys safe passage into the merge, where I'll turn and bring down that smug ass bird for good. Oh, and throw in that stupid Sawk while we're at it."**

 **0000**

"Oh man, c'mon!" Victini moaned. "Hariyama's out clubbing with the legendaries, a club that I've _never been invited to,_ Manaphy is dating that asshole Jirachi, and I really don't want to call Phione. I need emotional support right now!"

"You want to vent? Maybe you could vent with me a little bit?" Chandelure asked, waving one of her lamps.

"Gah!" Victini yelped, spinning around. "Oh, it's just a contestant. Jesus, you freaky ghosts…"

"Sorry!" Chandelure said, blushing. "I just couldn't help but hear you, and you sounded so upset!"

"I…I'm sorry you had to hear that," Victini said, scratching the back of his head. "You should go hang out with your friends. Don't hang out with an old timer like me, I might give you back pain."

"That's okay, I don't really have any other friends," Chandelure said brightly. "I er…. I wanted to maybe be that moral support you needed."

"Weren't you the one that called me hot, earlier?" Victini said suspiciously.

"I'm sorry about that," Chandelure said with a gulp. "I'm not the best in social situations and I tend to blurt things out."

"Oh, tell me about it," Victini said with a groan. "Once I called Manaphy 'Mom' once. She won't let me hear the end of it."

Chandelure giggled. "Sounds embarrassing, 'Dad!'"

Victini snickered along with her. "Oh man…alright, maybe we can get a quick cup of coffee. I just have… a lot on my mind."

"I've been told I'm a good listener!" Chandelure said. "Just…you're not one of those people who spends the whole night talking about themselves, are you?"

"Um…guilty," Victini blushed.

"Then I'd better grab my sleeping bag and a pillow," Chandelure said, giving him a playful poke. "I've always wanted to hang out with my superior, just as bros."

The phone rang, and Victini picked it up, feeling a little panicked. This time he was sure to check the caller id, in case Venusaur was back for more.

It was Hariyama.

Victini opted to send a text message in response: 'enjoy ur nite!' He'd probably be okay tonight after all.

 **0000**

 **Well, that's our second chapter and first elimination. Throh's story is a bit tragic but ends on a hopeful note. Plus, he has a chance to return to the show!**

 **Unlike last time, I really enjoyed writing the chapter and think it came out really well. I'm playing with a brand-new threshold of themes and ideas not really present in many of these types of stories, and I'm happy where it's going.**

 **A lot of people expected Pidgey to be an easy first boot, but no. I didn't bring him back just to troll you guys. This time around he serves a purpose in the narrative, and if it isn't obvious yet, it will be soon.**

 **Also, for those who submitted OC's: How are the characters so far? Am I handling them well? Am I not? I do tend to put my own spin on these types of characters, but if they feel too alien or different from your vision then send a pm my way. We'll work it out.**

 **I think that's all for now, folks. Stay tuned.**

 **Fun Fact: Originally, Talonflame was going to return halfway through season one, but didn't because I had no direction for the character. This time around I have no excuse, Haha.**

 **Throh: Review and I'll dance for you! Until we meet again!**


	3. Chapter 3: Pokkemon's Got Talent

0000

Victini's eyes fluttered open, and he glanced blearily around his surroundings. He was lying in his queen-sized bed in his own personal quarters, a good deal bigger than the cabin he'd had last time. Yawning, he made to move, but felt two curly, black arms wrap tightly around him.

"J-just a few more minutes," Chandelure mumbled, nuzzling his back.

Eyes shooting awake, the memories of the night before filled Victini's brain. He yelped and jumped away, causing Chandelure to let out a tired groan.

"I…oh god…I shouldn't have," Victini mumbled. "Aww man…"

"What?" Chandelure asked sleepily. "We didn't do anything besides cuddle a little."

"I, the host of a now prestigious show, just spent the night canoodling with one of my contestants," Victini groaned, shoving his face into a pillow. "The show hasn't even been on for a week yet. Ugh, give it to me straight, how old are you?"

Chandelure thought for a moment. "One hundred and fifty….ish?"

Victini gaped.

"Wh-what?" Chandelure blushed. "Th-that's not that old in ghost years."

"Right, ghost typing," Victini said, smacking his head at his stupidity. "Anyway, I uh…I'm sorry for overreacting, but I really don't want my boss to catch wind of this. I'd be fired so fast…"

"Pssh, judging by your description of him he'd just revel in the controversy," Chandelure said. "You ramble too much, Victini, and it's one of the things I like about you, but good god does it get annoying."

"Well, I'm not sure what exactly it is you see in me, but thank you for last night," Victini said, leaning over to kiss her forehead. "I….it helped me a lot. I'm grateful that you were there for me."

He cleared his throat. "But this cannot get out! So, don't tell anyone, and especially don't say something in the confessional. We both could lose out big time in national television."

Chandelure wrapped her arms around Victini's neck. "Okay, I promise under one condition. This isn't a one-time thing."

Victini blushed. "Chandelure…."

"Hey, you can't just spend four hours watching someone cry their eyes out and lay out their entire life story and not be emotionally invested," Chandelure said with a wink. "And I like you a lot, Victini. You're honest and sensitive, and your ears are really fluffy."

"Alright, alright," Victini said. "I have no way of rebutting you when you mention the ears. Just… be careful, okay? I don't want this to turn into a whole scandal and make you out to be a…. well, something you're not."

Chandelure rolled her eyes. "All right, all right, I won't say a word."

 **0000**

" **Chandelure wasn't back last night," Absol said, giving the camera a puzzled look. "I've been told I'm bad at keeping out of other people's business, but I don't like secrets on my team. She has some explaining to do when I find her."**

 **0000**

After Victini's call that there was a challenge around noontime and that it was best for the castmates to grab breakfast, they piled into the cafeteria and grabbed some trays. Surprisingly, with the higher budget and the increase in cooking staff, the food tasted delicious.

"Aw man, someone's already leaving today?" Emolga said through a mouthful of pancake. "I thought we got a couple days between challenges."

"Maybe the schedule's tighter?" Mawile said with a shrug, before giving Emolga a concerned look. "Would you slow down? Why the hell are you in a rush to finish eating?"

"Becauthe," Emolga said, choking down her breakfast. "I want to get some over to Crobat. He's sitting back at the cabin by himself."

"I don't get your obsession with that guy," Mawile said. "Isn't he kind of a dick?"

"Well, yeah, but that's what makes befriending him so fun!" Emolga exclaimed. "I relish the challenge."

"You're insane," Mawile said, before grinning. "Let me come with. I need to see this."

Meanwhile, at one of the other tables, Pidgey seemed to be the center of attention, having been the only one present to know all the legendary contestants of season one personally. Unfortunately, all his replies to questions seemed to be long winded rants about himself.

"So, I have to ask," Kirlia said with a giggle. "If you're so mighty, how come you haven't evolved yet?"

"Ah," Pidgey said with a tearful sniff. "It's a tragic story. Back when I was but a stronger than average youngster, I swallowed an everstone. I can do many things, but I'm incapable of evolving. It's my kryptonite."

"I uh…I don't think that's how kryptonite works," Komala piped up.

"Hey, Growlithe?" Rockruff said with a bark, nudging the fire type. "Why do you think Liepard's sitting by herself?"

"I don't care, she's a cat," Growlithe muttered. "I hate cats."

"I hate cats too," Rockruff said. "But doesn't she have any friends?"

"Cats don't have friends. They're sociopathic assholes that only deal with people when they get something from them. Like that dumbass Meowth over there."

Rockruff looked up. Meowth was propping his feet on an annoyed Porygon, tossing a fish in his mouth.

"That's offensive, Growlithe," Bellosom said, bopping the fire type on the head with a rolled up newspaper. "Could someone read this out for me? I'm afraid I never really learned when I was a kid."

"Wait, you're illiterate?" Growlithe said in surprise. "Nobody ever taught you?"

Bellosom shrugged. "There was no one to teach."

 **0000**

" **Bellosom makes no sense to me," Growlithe muttered. "He seems to be in the gutter, but he talks like he's had a good education and experience in the world. He also lacks shame, as he tried to use water from Feebas's fishing bowl to wash himself, but that may be totally unrelated, I don't know."**

 **0000**

"Oh, there she is," Absol said, as Chandelure hurried to the cafeteria, her eyes darting back and forth. Klefki caught sight of her as well, narrowing his eyes.

"Where have you been?" Absol said loudly, though she was courteous enough to take Chandelure aside.

"Oh uh…Haha, you know me, ghost type and all," Chandelure said with a nervous laugh. "I don't need to sleep, so I wandered around the studio a bit."

"Girl, don't bother lying to me," Absol said, rolling her eyes. "You're bad at it and it's disrespecting my intelligence. I also noticed that your pillow and toiletries were gone. Where did you spend the night?"

Chandelure wilted. "There are no cameras here, right?"

Absol nodded.

"V-victini's cabin."

Absol gaped at her, before a wicked grin appeared on her face. "Oh, you little monster. You and the host of the show…"

"Okay stop talking please, and we didn't do what you're implying..." Chandelure said, turning red. "I-I don't even know how it happened. We were up really late talking, and…"

Absol's expression turned suspicious for a moment. "Was this just to get a leg up in the competition? Because, if so-"

"No, no, no," Chandelure said, and she went an even deeper shade of scarlet. "I probably would have seduced him if that was the case! I... I actually really like him a lot."

"Well then, pound it here," Absol said, raising up a paw. "It's not every day you get the legendary Pokemon hosting the competition in the sack."

Chandelure moaned. "I didn't-"

"Wait…. she fucked Victini?" Weavile asked, walking by. He grinned at their expressions. "Oh my god, Chandelure fucked Victini."

Chandelure mumbled excuses and denials as Weavile cackled, covering her face. "That's not...I wouldn't have…"

"Oh, this is hilarious!" Weavile said, giving Chandelure a round of applause. "I-I have to tell everybody!"

Absol pinned him to a wall, pointing her horn at his neck. "Hey. You're going to shut up. Then you're going to forget about what you just heard. You leave my girl alone, or I'll show you why they call me the Disaster Pokemon."

"But I thought…you only…forewarned…. dangers," Weavile choked out.

"Stop talking, Weavile," Absol said. Weavile relented, and the dark type dropped him.

"So," Absol said, turning back to a shocked Chandelure with a sweet smile as Weavile massaged his throat. "Was this a one-time thing?"

Chandelure sheepishly showed off the keys to Victini's apartment. Absol and Weavile gaped. "N-not exactly."

"Well, I wish you luck, girl," Absol said. "Just don't use it too much to your advantage in the game and we're good. I'm supporting you all the way in this relationship, and I hope you go public with it once the competition's over. Don't you agree, Weavile?"

Weavile shrugged. "Eh, I mean, I think it's kinda scummy for a host to date his- "

"Don't you agree, Weavile?"

Weavile backed up, raising his hands in surrender. "All right, all right! I support you all the way, and I'll send you flowers and whatever. Just don't stab me, please."

"Thanks, Weavile, now you run away," Absol said, jerking her head. Weavile muttered something and slouched off. "Now."

"Wh-what do you want?" Chandelure asked.

"Details," Absol hissed, giving Chandelure a demonic grin.

Meanwhile, Weavile was still grumbling to himself when someone tapped on his shoulder. Shrieking, he jumped back in a defensive stance and stared….at Magmar?

"What's your problem?" Magmar asked, scratching his head. "I just wanted to talk for a moment."

 **0000**

 **Klefki giggled, waving the keys to Victini's cabin. "Guess what I snatched!"**

 **He winked. "Also, a lot of cheeky stuff is going down already. This season sure isn't wanting for drama, let me tell you."**

 **0000**

"So, what did you want to talk about, dude?" Weavile asked Magmar as they sat down at an empty table.

"We've worked together pretty well last challenge," Magmar said, folding his hands. "I was wondering if you were interested in joining an alliance with me."

"An alliance?" Weavile said, raising an eyebrow. "Isn't it kind of early?"

"It's never too early to control the vote!" Magmar said. "We're both strong competitors, and we could easily survive until the merge if we work together."

"So, what, just the two of us?" Weavile asked. "Dynamic duo?"

"I was thinking we could invite a couple more," Magmar said. "A few of the misfits. Liepard, Mimikyu, and Gengar. Of course, we won't share the same loyalty with them as we do to each other, and we'll boot them off if we see fit, but it's a start."

"Well, shoot, I'm game," Weavile said with a grin. "Not like I had a plan to win before."

"Brilliant!" Magmar said with a smile. "I'll work over Mimikyu, and you take care of Liepard."

 **0000**

" **According to this book, it's wise to form up an alliance to keep you safe before the merge hits," Magmar said. "It's what kept the majority of Team Eviolite safe, and it keeps me safe as well. I'll probably dump all but Weavile once we hit the merge, but they don't need to know that."**

 **0000**

" **Magmar's not as smart as he likes to think he is, but hey, he's still the closest person I have to a friend so far," Weavile said, shrugging. "I'm thinking this alliance deal is the best chance I have."**

 **0000**

Noivern nodded her head to the baseline of one of her favorite songs. Indie rock had always been able to soothe her nerves under stress. She had decided to go on a morning flight over the perimeter of the film studio, with the purpose of searching for the immunity idol.

Something caught her eye, a slip of brown on a film set that resembled the moon landing. Flapping her wings, she touched down in front of the brown folder, gazing at the picture taped to the front.

"Is that…Kecleon?" Noivern muttered to herself, lifting it closer to her face.

"Supersonic!"

The attack struck Noivern before she even had time to move, and her vision blurred. She had no idea which way was up, and the sound of her soothing music was replaced by tiny birds chirping in her ear.

"Whirlwind!" Crobat said, whipping his wings to create a whirlwind that sent the dragon flying, the file falling out of her grip and sent fluttering to the ground.

"Idiot. You did away with your incredible hearing ability with that brain numbing music. We Crobat are quiet when we fly, but you living speakers could hear a pin drop.

" _Interesting,"_ Crobat said with a smirk as he gazed over the picture of Kecleon. "I knew leaving that decoy was a smart idea."

 **0000**

" **Yeah, I used substitute to create a decoy back at the cabin to make it look like I was sitting by myself there," Crobat explained. "Good thing I did too."**

 **He showed off five brown envelopes, revealing the faces of Kecleon, Feebas, Furret, Sawk, and Bellosom. "A pretty good hand, wouldn't you say? These data files reveal strengths, weaknesses, origins, and motivations of the contestants I'll be competing against, which saves a hell of a lot of time for me. Thanks for the advantage, Victini."**

 **He gritted his teeth. "My biggest issue now is that I can't find** _ **my**_ **file. There's a lot about myself I don't want leaked."**

 **0000**

Emolga kicked down the door to the boy's cabin, revealing…Crobat, playing solitaire. He looked up at her in surprise as she placed down a tray of food in front of him.

"Thought you might be hungry, so I grabbed you a muffin!" Emolga said.

"I didn't ask for your food, Emolga, now please go away," Crobat drawled, flipping a card.

"Say, was that window always broken?" Mawile asked, pointing to a window covered in broken glass.

"Uh…y-yeah, of course," Crobat said, moving his wing to cover a cut on his forehead. "Now, I'm _this_ close to finishing, so can you- "

"How do you play go fish by yourself?" Emolga piped up. "Doesn't it get lonely."

"Okay one, I don't _play_ shitty go fish," Crobat snapped. "I have higher standards than that. This is solitaire, a game you play by yourself."

Emolga looked confused. "But what's the point of playing cards if- "

Mawile rolled her eyes and grabbed her shoulder. "Sorry for bothering you, Crobat. Challenge is in an hour."

"Yeah, yeah," Crobat said, rolling his eyes. "Go away."

As soon as they left the cabin, Crobat collapsed on his back. "Too close, Jesus."

 **0000**

" **Emolga gets on my nerves, but hey, she might not be too bad of a meat shield given her popularity," Crobat said with a shrug. "Nobody would probably vote me off if they thought I was her friend, and on my end, I could trick her and Mawile into voting anyone I want out."**

 **0000**

"Alright teams," Victini said, clearing his throat. He was floating on the stage where the elimination ceremony was held, as the castmates sat down with their respective teams. "Quick thing to discuss before I announce the next challenge."

He pulled out an envelope. "I have here the results for the winner of the acting part of yesterday's challenge. The winner is…"

He stared in horror. "Oh, you _cannot_ be serious!"

"Who was it?" Komala asked, curious. "Throh?"

"N-no. It's Pidgey!" Victini growled. "Isn't this just wonderful?"

Silence. Before-

"Yahoo!" Pidgey shrieked, raising a wing. "I'm the best, around! Nothing's gonna ever-"

"Shut it, Pidgey," Victini snapped. "Ugh…. you get immunity tonight if your team loses. Give him a round of applause, everybody."

This was met with halfhearted clapping, except for Klefki, who jangled his keys enthusiastically.

"Before I announce the challenge," Victini said with a grin. "Team Captains!"

Butterfree perked up, looking interested.

"For the Sucky Shuckles… the captain will be Absol!" Victini said. Absol smirked at this and blew a kiss. Rockruff, Bellosom, and Kirlia clapped politely, while Chandelure gave her a smile.

"For the Unique Umbreons…. the captain will be Flygon!" Victini announced. Flygon looked stunned, but smiled, and Pawniard patted him on the shoulder.

"…What?" Butterfree asked, looking shocked. "I-I wasn't picked…?"

Beedrill snickered. "Man, do I like it when you're humbled."

"Shut up!"

"Now that it's settled, I'd say it's time to discuss the challenge, which will be an old classic!" Victini announced. "A talent show! This one's simple. Pick five teammates to show off their talents on the big stage, and three impartial judges (myself included), will act as judges to assign them points. The team with the greatest amount of points at the end wins!"

"What exactly counts as a talent?" Toucannon asked, raising a wing.

"As long as it's legal, it's cool with me!" Victini said. "Sing, dance, do a skit, I don't care. Just have fun and try not to lose, because then you might be eliminated!"

 **0000**

" **I suppose I'll have to sit out of this one," Kirlia said with a sigh. "I enjoy dancing, but my team needs more than my skinny legs flopping around like a fish out of water."**

 **0000**

" **My time has come," Crobat said with a laugh. "What, no I don't have a talent. I'll be heckling the shit out of these performances!** _ **"**_

 **0000**

" **I-I assumed that I'd be chosen to be team captain," Butterfree said, looking lost. "This is…. dizzying."**

 **0000**

"Uh…alright team!" Flygon said in his best authoritarian voice. "There are nineteen of us, and of those nineteen, five will be chosen to represent our team. So, let's get to it soldiers!"

Pawniard chuckled. "We're in a reality show, not Vietnam. You can loosen up a little."

Flygon blushed. "Right. Sorry."

He cleared his throat. "So, uh…any volunteers? Any talents worth showing off?"

"Ooh, me!" Popplio said, clapping his hands. "I can do all sorts of neat tricks for the audience, pick me!"

"Well, we've all seen you perform before," Toucannon said. "I can't see why not."

"Yeah, you've got my approval," Flygon said. "Anyone else? Noivern?"

"Who, me?" Noivern grunted. "Why single out me?"

"You're good with that guitar," Flygon said with a shrug. "Do a solo or something."

Noivern shrugged. "I guess so, if nobody else is willing."

Pidgey cleared his throat, about to boast something, but the rest of his team glared at him. After a moment he relented, looking downcast.

"What about you, Beedrill?" Flygon asked. "Anything bizarre you can do?"

Beedrill shrugged. "Whittling and carving, I guess? I just need a knife or something sharp-"

"N-no, Beedrill, that's fine," Flygon said, rubbing his head. "Uh…how much time do we have before the challenge starts?"

"Six hours," Butterfree said as a matter of fact. "Shave off two for stage preparation and rehearsal though."

"Alright then, take five guys," Flygon said. "I think I need some Tylenol or something. Killer headache. Just, get ready your talents everyone, and Pawniard, Butterfree, and I will decide who gets to participate in the show."

The Unique Umbreons all muttered assent and split up. Pawniard gave Flygon a concerned look.

 **0000**

" **He has a lot on his shoulders and it's not like he asked for the burden," Pawniard said. "I'll need to help him out."**

 **0000**

" **I guess I've never really seen myself as a leader," Flygon admitted. "A rule follower? Totally. But I'm expected to teach when I came here to learn, and I don't exactly know how to handle that."**

 **0000**

"Alright," Absol said, leaning back in the director's chair that Weavile had 'appropriated'. "Bellosom, you'll be performing on your ukulele and Ariados will be reading a poem out loud. Anyone else? Gengar?"

"I play saxophone, but I wouldn't want to step on Bellosom's toes," Gengar said with a smile.

"You would not be stepping on anything, Gengar!" Bellosom said, waving him off. "Music is a gift that should be shared. In truth, I have another talent that I would prefer to show off."

"Oh, and what's that?" Absol asked, raising an eyebrow.

"My special ingredient," Bellosom said. "For a perfect cup of tea."

"Well, give me a cup and if it's good I'll send you out there," Absol said. "But it better be the best damn tea in the world. What about you, Chandelure? Any talents?"

"Oh, um…no, Haha…" Chandelure said, turning red. "Nothing that would look too good on stage, sorry."

"My talent is selling products at outrageous prices!" Kecleon said with a smile. "Want me to try it on you?"

"No, no," Absol said, rolling her eyes. "What about singing? We got any singers here?"

"Ooh! Ooh!" Rockruff barked. "Growl-"

Growlithe covered his mouth. "Shut up!"

"You can sing?" Absol asked, raising an eyebrow.

Rockruff and Growlithe barked "no!" and "yes!" at the same time.

"I heard you!" Rockruff said, wagging his tail. "You sounded great!"

"I-I shut up!" Growlithe whimpered. "I don't wanna do it."

"There's nothing to be ashamed of," Gengar said. "Singing well is a talent that many strive for. Follow what you excel in."

"Don't make sing onstage!" Growlithe growled. "I'll puke all over you out of spite."

"Whatever," Absol said. "But, it's your ass on the line if we lose. We need a few more, guys. Kirlia, didn't Victini mention ballet?"

"O-oh!" Kirlia said, turning scarlet. "I-yes, I do love dancing, but I hardly qualify for this challenge. I have two left feet, if we're being honest."

"You like ballet? I love ballet!" Komala said, clapping his hands. "We could perform together!"

"Are you sure?" Kirlia asked, looking down in embarrassment. "I'd probably just slow you down."

"Nah, it'll be fun," Komala said, squeezing her hand. "We should practice. After a snack."

"Well, if that's settled, we just need one more," Absol said. "Let's see…Liepard?"

Liepard glared. "No."

"Damn it, will someone volunteer?" Absol asked, losing her patience. "I don't want to track people down to compete in the challenge, so from now on, anyone who doesn't speak up about a talent they have is a candidate for elimination. Feebas? Mimikyu?"

"Uh…. I mean, I can do tricks and stuff, but like, I think it would be a bit more impressive if I was a goldfish that lacked sentience," Feebas admitted.

"I will compete!" Mimikyu hissed, showing them, all painting that showed Chandelure biting off Victini's head. "THEN I WILL HAVE MY VENGANCE!"

"Okay, nice picture, but er…a little gruesome for our show's rating," Absol said, scratching her fur awkwardly.

"Why is my mouth so big?" Chandelure whispered.

"I'll go. I've always fancied myself a rapper," Magmar said, interrupting the conversation. "All I need is to get a beat going and I'll totally kick ass."

"There, perfect, fine!" Absol said in relief. "We have our lineup. Now, get to rehearsing. I expect a lot out of you guys."

 **0000**

" **They're like a bunch of distracted children," Absol deadpanned, before grinning. "Still, once I got loud I got results. I think I know how to keep them in line."**

 **0000**

Flygon was sitting on the top of his team's trailer, looking down on the film lot below him. Letting out a sigh, he did his best to relax, but couldn't stop the thumping in his chest.

"You know, yesterday I thought you had the look of the leader, and that's why I wasn't surprised you were chosen. Now I'm beginning to have second thoughts."

Flygon looked over, at Meowth, who was climbing through a window to sit next to him. "Yeah? Well, maybe I never thought I looked much like a leader. I never asked to be captain, and it's a lot of pressure."

"Well, I suppose I can relate then," Meowth said, nodding to himself. "I was born a prince, and thus was prepared to be one. Lilligant's in a similar position. I suppose that's why we come to blows so often. We understand one another."

"So, how did you do it then?" Flygon asked. "You speak about your title with pride and intensity. You're the most driven man I think I've ever seen. How did you accept it?"

Meowth leaned back. "Time. Time and maturity. But there's a secret, passed down by my people, on how to act when you're consumed by fear. This phrase helped my forefathers and it helped me as well. Would you like to hear it?"

"Wow, I'm honored," Flygon said in a hushed voice. "What is it?"

Meowth shrugged. "Fake it till ya make it."

"Th-that's it?" Flygon asked.

"Certainly," Meowth said. "When you speak with confidence, even if it is false, people will come to believe and respect you. Soon you won't be faking it anymore. If you stutter or falter like you did a few minutes ago, well…"

"Well, what?"

Meowth sighed. "Butterfree and Toucannon are usurpers. Quite ambitious people with a thirst to prove themselves. Show them a sign of weakness and you'll end up like one of my great uncles."

"What happened to him?" Flygon asked with a gulp.

"Beheaded," Meowth said lightly. "He didn't change when the kingdom needed him to, and he paid the ultimate price for it. You wouldn't want to end up like him."

"B-beheaded?" Flygon asked, massaging his neck. "That's…wow…"

"Oh, don't worry about it, it was a clean strike through his neck," Meowth said. "Guillotine was very clean and polished. He barely felt a thing."

He stretched. "Well, I'm off to the makeup tent to look my best for the show. Best of luck, fellow ruler."

"But…you aren't even competing in this challenge, what's the point?" Flygon asked.

"Oh Flygon," Meowth said, giving him a smile. "You never know when you're about to be assassinated, so always present yourself to the fullest."

He climbed down the trailer and darted off, leaving a dumbfounded Flygon behind.

 **0000**

" **You know, I couldn't even tell if that was supposed to be a metaphor or real-life advice," Flygon said with a gulp. "Remind me never to get involved in politics over in Persian."**

 **He narrowed his eyes. "Still, I'm thankful for his input. I need to get a grip over myself and accept the role I've been given."**

 **0000**

" **Plant Girl does not like it when people have been talking about her," Lilligant said, sneezing into a tissue. "It gives Plant Girl the sniffles."**

 **0000**

"An alliance?" Mimikyu asked, giving Magmar a curious look. "You want to join me in my conquest to destroy every Pikachu in existence?"

"NO!" Magmar shouted, looking horrified. "Well, maybe, but first we should work together to dominate this game."

"Hm…" Mimikyu said, glaring at Magmar. "Well, your forehead looks like a butt, and you don't seem very fluffy…yes…okay, I will enjoy forming a union with you, oh unpopular one."

"Uh…thank you," Magmar said, looking uncomfortable. "I think? Well, we're having a meeting at the pirates' set after the challenge, so meet us there, okay?"

Mimikyu giggled. "We'll obliterate all Pokemon that are loved more than me!"

"This…may not have been the best idea," Magmar murmured.

"WHAT WAS THAT!?"

"N-nothing!"

 **0000**

" **Servants to do my bidding, eh?" Mimikyu asked, giggling to herself. "Wonderful. Absol, being the beautiful and popular species that she is, will be the first to go, and I will rule this team with an iron fist!"**

 **0000**

" **My forehead does not look like a butt!" Magmar said, folding his arms. "….D-does it?"**

 **He hesitated. "Damn it, someone get me a mirror!"**

 **0000**

"You have weird taste in alliance members," Liepard said, giving Weavile an odd look. "Magmar…you, me, and _Mimikyu?"_

"And Gengar," Weavile added. "If we can convince him. And hey, no judging. Magmar's a little…uh…weird, but this is a pretty good opportunity!"

"I guess there's no reason to say no," Liepard said. "The company isn't too good, but I'm really not a fan of anyone else on the team so there's no real point in picking them over you guys."

"Plus, you'll get to work with me, sweetheart," Weavile said, grinning. "Chance of a lifetime."

"I now see a reason to say no," Liepard deadpanned. "Screw off!"

"Oh, come on!" Weavile snapped. "Don't be like that. Look, just meet us over at the pirates' set and you'll warm up to the idea!"

"Fine!" Liepard snapped. "Anything to get away from you. If this somehow backfires and gets me eliminated I'm killing all three of you though, don't think I won't!"

 **0000**

 **Weavile blew a kiss. "Weavile seduction. Never fails me with the ladies."**

 **0000**

" **If I stayed there any longer with him I'd probably end up pregnant," Liepard said, rolling her eyes. "First Furret then this weasel, I swear if this show takes my virginity I'm suing."**

 **0000**

"Okay, so for our talent show we have Popplio's clown act, Noivern's one-woman band, Mawile's comedy routine, and Heliolisk's cup stacking," Flygon said, checking off his notebook. "One more, guys."

"Hm…well it's not much of a talent in the traditional sense, but…" Butterfree muttered to himself.

"Throw me a math equation, Porygon. Start a calculator program to check."

"Okay," Porygon said. "seventy times twenty-four."

"One thousand six hundred and eighty," Butterfree said without hesitation.

"That's correct," Porygon said with a nod. "Impressive."

"Wow, Butterfree!" Shellder said. "That's really- "

"Another one," Butterfree said. "Harder this time."

"Nine hundred and ninety-eight times six hundred forty two," Porgyon said.

"Six hundred and forty thousand, seven hundred sixteen," Butterfree replied just as quickly.

"Correct again," Porgyon said.

"How can you do that, Butterfree?" Flygon asked. "That's amazing!"

"My mind's always been like that," Butterfree said with a shrug. "It made math tests very easy growing up."

"Well, we could certainly do that," Flygon said. "Or Pawniard's culinary arts. Anyway, we should probably get a sense of what everyone can do before-where are Furret and Castform?"

Mawile giggled. "Well, Furret told me he was off to go look at the flowers at the Sucky Shuckle's team, but I think Castform just does his own thing."

"I believe Castform is below the cafeteria," Porgyon said. "I've spent a day with him and I can tell you with utmost certainty that he has a talent that is almost beyond our comprehension. There is a seventy eight percent chance that he is working, creating something that could dominate the competition, and even in this short period of time I'm convinced he very well could."

0000

Castform snickered as he floated clumsily around the now empty liquor cabinet, bumping into crates and sending the empty bottles smashing onto the floor.

"Castform!?" Flygon shouted. "What the hell have you been doing?"

"Heyyy, not s-so loud, Dragonfly," Castform said, hiccupping. "I was just taking a little break. And it's 'Doctor Castform', to you."

"Did he drink ALL the alcohol in the cellar?" Heliolisk gasped. "Th-that's like…a lot of liters."

"Well," Porygon said with a sigh. "There's the other twenty two percent."

"No fair, Porygon," Emolga said with a pout. "I was so hyped to see him make a huge mech suit or something. Thanks for blue balling us."

"Also, how could you drink literally an entire wine cellar!?" Butterfree shouted. "Do you want to murder your liver?"

"I'll j-just create a new one, you stupid butterfly!" Castform growled. "Wh-what do you know? How do you-y- do you want to know my origin story?"

"Not really," Flygon snapped. "I want you to shower because you smell like vomit and alcoholism."

"I was captured by the Wong Chu, is what I did," Castform said, pointing at Flygon and giving him a drunken glare. "Then I had to bust my way out by making a suit of armor out of nothing but the materials I found there. S-so don't you tell me…"

"Castform, you're not Tony Stark," Butterfree drawled. "Please, someone, just get him out of here."

"I find this salvageable," Porygon said. "Give me a few hours with him and he'll be presentable for the challenge."

"What's the point, Porygon?" Flygon asked. "We have two able talents, is it even worth it?"

"I calculate a very high possibility that if we use Castform we'll win, flat out," Porygon said. "Have him go first. If he fails, then we'll have four backups. If he succeeds, he'll blow the competition out of the water."

Flygon hesitated, scratching his head.

"You can't be seriously considering this?" Butterfree asked, dumbfounded.

"Alright, I'll give you the chance," Flygon said with a sigh. "But if you lose it's both of you that have to take responsibility, alright?"

"I understand the consequences of failure," Porygon said with a sharp nod.

 **0000**

" **In truth, I'm doing this to protect Castform," Porgyon admitted. "This team is made up superior players, and while Castform is a genius, he…isn't very likeable or easy to understand. If he doesn't pull off a win now it's very likely he'll be eliminated in the near future."**

 **0000**

Ariados hummed to herself as she wrote the poem she was preparing to read aloud for the talent show, occasionally crossing out lines and replacing words.

"Hi Ariados!" Furret said, approaching with a friendly wave. "Writing a song?"

"Poem, actually," Ariados said, looking up at him with a suspicious look. "What, were you sent to spy on me or something? You can be honest, I don't really care."

"Not at all!" Furret said, looking offended. "In fact, my team is probably hunting me down for leaving them, and I'll be in a lot of trouble."

"Oh?" Ariados said. "So why come to this neck of the woods in the first place, Furball?"

"Well, I saw how beautiful your form was in the daylight and realized I had to make conversation!" Furret said with a smile. "Hope I'm not too forward?"

"Huh?" Ariados asked. "Why would you try to flirt with me? I lack uh…any body part mammals like you would find appealing. Like…any. I lay eggs with my epigynum, so uh…no vagina."

"So, spider does not, in fact, have puss puss," Furret muttered to himself. "I need to write that myth buster down."

"What was that?" Ariados asked.

"Oh nothing," Furret said, waving her question away. "But a true connoisseur recognizes what is beautiful in all women. Your abdomen is glossy and beautiful, your body is a magnificent shade of red, and I've always been a legs' man myself."

"You're hitting on a spider," Ariados said with a laugh. "Wow, this is a first for me."

"Well, where I'm from there aren't many spiders to hit on," Furret said. "I need to use this rare opportunity Arceus has given me."

"I'm just not sure what you're getting out of this," Ariados said through laughter. "Even if you wooed me, what come of it?"

"Cuddling?" Furret asked with a wink. "Lots of fun activities involving webbing?"

"…You're a weirdo," Ariados said with a snicker. "But, you won me over. I'll hang out with you."

"I knew I was irresistible!" Furret said, pumping his fist in the air. "I won over the most beautiful girl in the competition."

"Oh, stop flattering me," Ariados said, ascending from some string up to the trailer. "I'll make us some tea."

 **0000**

" **To go where no man has ever dared go before," Furret said in a hushed voice. "The spider web!"**

 **0000**

" **What ferret is attracted to an arachnid that they have no chance of breeding with, even if she consented?" Ariados asked. "It defies like…biology itself."**

 **She blushed. "I'll admit I enjoy the attention, though. It's not like guys usually give me time of day, given the fact that I'm a giant hideous spider. Really says more about Furret then it does about other guys."**

 **0000**

"Alright guys!" Victini said, floating on stage. "The castmates competing in Total Pokkemon Action: Who's Got Talent are all backstage and ready to show off their skills, so let's introduce the judges!"

Floating down to the judges' table, Victini cleared his throat. "First myself, the host with the most, Victini!"

Hariyama cracked his knuckles. "Hariyama is back and ready to get party rolling."

"And I'm here too!" Phione said, clapping. "Back by popular demand!"

"For some reason," Victini grumbled, before making himself look energetic once again. "We have ten wonderful performances ahead of us, so let's dig in!"

 **0000**

" **I'm a little worried," Kirlia admitted, taking a few deep breaths. "I'm really nothing special when it comes to dancing, and I get a little nervous on a big stage like this, especially given how massive the audience is. Hopefully Komala can guide me through this."**

 **0000**

" **More makeup," Porgyon informed the artists as they cleaned up Castform. "Make sure he looks as presentable as possible. Try to do away with the red in his eyes."**

" **I tolja, Robot, I'm gonna be fine," Castform slurred. "See, I have a technique. Sober…. now! Sober…. NOW!"**

 **He floated unsteadily for a moment. "See? Perfect!"**

 **Porygon groaned. "I'm beginning to regret this course of action."**

 **0000**

"Hey Solitaire, what'cha got there?" Emolga asked, poking Crobat. "Letter from home?"

"No, it's from my lawyer, confirming the restraining order I called on you," Crobat snapped. "And don't call me 'Solitaire', I hate nicknames."

"Aww, but it fits you so well, dude," Emolga giggled.

"I'm leaving," Crobat snapped, flying away.

"So, one to ten, how screwed is Castform?" Beedrill said with a snicker.

"I don't think it stops at ten," Shellder deadpanned. "I don't know what Porygon is playing at, having him go first."

"Well, fingers crossed, okay?" Flygon said. "Maybe he'll surprise us."

Meanwhile, Crobat flew up to a tall tree to look at the note. "This wasn't in the post, so someone here must've sent it… Jeez, this handwriting is awful."

 _Dear Crobat,_

 _I know you from the various reality shows you competed on. I know that your goal in this competition is to make a scene and prove your misanthropic point about the world. I believe that our intentions align, and I can help you achieve this. At some point during the talent show, rile up Klefki. I'll give you the signal. He'll sabotage his team and lose them the challenge. You'll get all the credit for this, I know you want it, and I'll stay hidden in the shadows. Alternatively, you could ignore this letter, but there will be consequences._

 _With utmost respect,_

 _-P_

"So how about that," Crobat muttered to himself. "Someone's trying to use me, eh? I'll have trump soon enough, but in the meantime…"

 **0000**

" **Of** _ **course,**_ **I'm going to take this opportunity," Crobat said, rolling his eyes. "The letter may have been cliché and amateurish, but he still pegged me to a 'T'. Mark my words, I will expose whoever this 'P' guy is, but in the meantime, I may as well use his gifts to my advantage."**

 **0000**

"We have a pretty good line up," Chandelure said with a smile. "All of our members are good at their skills, and they're diverse enough to not get old."

"Still though, if you think about it, the other team is made up of Pokemon who all outplayed us in the last challenge," Mimikyu grumbled. "We've been put in a disadvantage from the get-go. I wouldn't count on anything."

"Wow, Mimikyu," Liepard said in false shock. "Was that a coherent sentence without a word of lunacy in it?"

Mimikyu scowled at her. "Silence, feline, or you will be the first in line to the concentration camp."

"And, right back to crazy town."

"C'mon, we should faith in our team!" Rockruff barked. "I know for a fact they're going to kick ass."

Feebas grinned, and Samurott gave a thumbs' up. Liepard merely yawned and settled down to nap.

"Okay, our first contestant is none other than Castform!" Victini announced. "Who will be…building something interesting!"

Unfortunately, nobody came on stage for so long that cast mates began to fidget.

"Oh no," Flygon moaned, massaging his head. "I knew this was a bad idea."

Hariyama whispered something into Victini's ear. The legendary Pokemon groaned in annoyance.

"Sorry, _Doctor_ Castform. Come on up, already!"

Castform flew up on stage, and admittedly he did look a bit more presentable. Unfortunately, he was still swaying and hiccupping, causing most of his teammates to cringe and shy away from him.

"Alright, I'm gonna show you a neat little trick," Castform said. "Heh heh…trick or treat and all that. Heh…heh..heh…

"I brought some materials that we're going to use," Castform said, dropping down a box that said 'Mateialz'.

"Who let him write the name on the box?" Crobat hissed. "It looks like a five-year-old did it."

Sawk nudged Toucannon. "It was quite foolish of a decision to allow Castform compete, wouldn't you agree?"

"Yes," Toucannon said, turning to glare at the dragonfly. "He's too lenient, and he bends to the will of what others say. What this team needs is strict discipline and harsh consequences."

"So, what do you want to do about it?" Sawk asked.

"If this challenge goes any further south then we'll have our opportunity," Toucannon said. "And if not, all we need is a little patience. His throne will crumble under his weight."

"So first we have a potion," Castform said, shaking the purple liquid in its bottle. "And my special secret substance." He pulled out a bright red liquid in a vial. "Now I just take my secret weapon…"

"I thought you said that he was proficient in robotics, not chemistry," Flygon hissed, glaring at Porygon.

"He's…. I believe he does both actually," Porygon said, looking puzzled, before his eyes widened at what Castform pulled out. "Oh no."

The weather Pokemon was holding in his mechanical hand a pink, phallic object. "Now let's see here…I think we press…this button?"

The pink, phallic object began to vibrate.

"What is that thing?" Phione asked.

"That is tool women use when husbands cannot satisfy them and Hariyama is out of town," Hariyama said, patting Phione's shoulder. "Will explain more when Phione is older."

"Oh, okay."

"Where did he even get it!?" Flygon hissed, faltering when he saw Lilligant stomp upstage and snatch the vibrator out of Castform's hand, slapping him for good measure.

"Do not touch Plant Girl's things," she said, growling at the intoxicated cloud.

 **0000**

" **How on earth is this story not M-rated?" Kirlia asked, looking scandalized.**

 **0000**

" **Plant Girl's species is one without males," Lilligant said, sitting straight with her arms folded. "Certain urges must be kept in check."**

 **0000**

" **You have to admire her bravery at the very least," Weavile said through snickers. "Glad that's not my team that just went."**

 **0000**

Castform tried to finish his presentation, but passed out halfway through it, his vial exploding the instant it hit the ground. The exhausted Pokemon had to be dragged off by Porygon as the judges discussed his score.

"We've decided that because Castform nearly took us off air with that shameful behavior, he gets no points!" Victini said with a bright smile. "Sucks to be you, Umbreons!"

The entire team turned to glare at Porgyon and Castform, the former looking ashamed and the other looking catatonic.

"Now, for the Sucky Shuckles, a little musical number by Gengar!" Phione shouted.

Gengar walked upstage with a polite smile, wearing a jacket and fedora. Sitting down on a stool, he closed his eyes and played his saxophone. The tune was energetic and loud, but there was a little melancholy behind it, and Gengar was so invested in the music he was practically dancing.

His little song was far more satisfactory then Castform's…shenanigans, so when he finished both teams applauded. Victini leaned in with the other judges to discuss something, and they came to an agreement rather quickly.

"Good job, Gengar!" Victini said. "You bring the Sucky Shuckles five points. Great music, but y'know, it wasn't exactly something we've never seen before."

"I understand," Gengar said with a bow. "Hopefully my team can make up for my lackluster performance."

"Don't worry about it, Gengar," Chandelure said. "You actually got points, and you played your song just as you planned it. There's no way you're going home."

"Thank you, Chandelure, I'm glad to hear that," Gengar said gratefully.

"Don't be so sure," Weavile muttered into the ghost's ear. "Join up in an alliance with us or risk being voted off."

"Hmm…" Gengar thought to himself. "You're implying that I'm insecure about leaving. I assure you I'm not."

"Next for the Umbreons, Noivern's one-woman band. Ooh, this should be interested!" Phione said, clapping.

Noivern stomped on stage, as Komala, Kirlia, and Popplio all placed down various musical instruments. She stepped over to the drums and picked up a pair of drumsticks.

"One, two, three, four!" Noivern shouted, slamming down on the drums and playing a quick beat. It was a catchy tune, but what was really impressive was when Noivern used double team to play the other instruments in perfect tandem. Her ears acted as speakers, so the music blared out louder than it would have normally.

When she finished, the smiled at the roar of applause sent her way.

 **0000**

" **I didn't have a ton of friends when I was a kid, so I devoted a lot of time to music," Noivern admitted. "Malcolm Gladwell had a point, eh?"**

 **0000**

"We've decided that Noivern's one-woman band performance is superior to Gengar's saxophone skills, and therefore offer her eight points," Victini announced after discussing with Phione and Hariyama.

Gengar clenched a fist, before taking a deep breath. "Fair enough. She was quite good."

"Moving on to the Shuckles again, we have Ariados with a poem!" Victini said. "Let's see if she can take the lead again."

Furret cheered loudly when Ariados walked onstage, to a suspicious glare from Toucannon.

"What?" He asked.

"Stop being supportive," Toucannon said. "If you encourage her she'll do better in the competition, and then we'll boot out you after we lose."

Furret gulped. "Noted."

Smiling at Furret and her team, Ariados pulled out a slip of paper and began to read:

" _In the grand scheme of things, a spider's life holds little meaning. She must scurry around the feet of those who couldn't be bothered to avoid stepping on her. She must build her webs in spots she knows are away from humans who won't hesitate to trample through it accidentally._

 _But what does human society mean to a spider either? Does she care about holidays, feelings of stress or depression, even the daily rhythm of people's lives? They're as meaningless to a spider as she is to the people who built it._

 _Life is just a matter of perspective."_

"Th-that's all," Ariados said, suddenly looking a little embarrassed. Her applause was a lot more polite and subdued then the performances before, though many Pokemon were muttering amongst themselves, analyzing the poem.

"Meh, no cool rhymes or anything," Victini said with a shrug. "Nice little message though, I guess. Four points!"

"Ooh, next time do a limerick!" Phione said. " _There once was a Phione from Hoenn…"_

 **0000**

" **Maybe I had the wrong audience," Ariados said with a shrug. "I hope some people liked what I wrote though. I really think what's most important in writing is getting the point across, rather than flowery language and loose metaphors."**

 **0000**

" **Man, I wish I could write like that," Chandelure said, her eyes shining. "I should really start hanging out with Ariados. We seem to have a lot in common."**

 **0000**

" **Wow, she's…really good," Furret said with a dreamy sigh. "I sure know how to pick 'em, eh?"**

 **0000**

"Next we have none other then Heliolisk, with his cup stacking skills," Victini announced, as the lizard Pokemon awkwardly made his way upstage, cups in hand.

"D-does anyone have a timer?" Heliolisk asked, awkwardly. "Just to show off how fast I can do it?"

"I do," Porygon said. "Please, allow me."

Taking a deep breath, Heliolisk set down all the cups in front of him. "Uh, could you give me like…a countdown or something?"

"Uh, alright," Victini said. "Three, two, -"

"Wait, wait!" Heliolisk yelped.

Victini groaned. "What?"

"Start from ten?" Heliolisk asked with a sheepish smile.

"Fine," Victini groaned. When he counted from ten, Heliolisk's hands became a blur, creating towers and breaking them down so fast the Pokemon watching couldn't tell if it was a mirage or not. He finished with a giraffe made from cups, and when he broke it down he screeched "TIME!"

"4.5 seconds," Porygon said, a note of awe in his mechanical voice.

"Damn…" Victini said. "Well uh…I don't exactly know what I just witnessed but it sure as hell was impressive. That's good for seven points!"

Heliolisk jumped for joy, running down and hugging Shellder in his glee.

 **0000**

" **Y'know, I wasn't sure I belonged on the Unique Umbreons," Heliolisk admitted, scratching the back of his head. "They all seemed to be such strong players…. I'm glad that I was able to contribute to my team."**

 **0000**

" **At least we know he's safe, even if we lose!" Shellder said brightly.**

 **0000**

"Ready to start rapping, Magmar?" Phione asked, clapping. Victini and Hariyama both raised their eyebrows, curious of the fire type's skills.

"Prepare for me to spit some fire!" Magmar said, doing a weird, Team Skull-esque dance.

"Uh…yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm Magmar, of fire, and I'm not up for hire. If you want to die, come meet my…uh…fire."

"You suck!" Crobat shouted. "Get off the stage, loser!"

"Well, if you let me finish!" Magmar shouted. "Then I can start getting good!"

"No seriously," Crobat sat. "My grandmother can rap better, and she's fucking dead!"

"Wha-buh…. I barely even started!" Magmar shouted. "No fair!"

"Please, just, get off the stage," Absol groaned, her head in her paw. "Don't embarrass yourself any further."

"W-well, fine!" Magmar snapped. "I didn't need you anyway!" He took off stage, covering his face with his hands.

"Uh….no points, right?" Phione asked.

"Certainly not," Hariyama chuckled. "That was terrible."

 **0000**

" **It's not fair!" Magmar moaned, tears falling down his face. "I want to be suave and cool, and they made fun of me!"**

 **A few interns tried to clean his face, but he swatted them away with his tail. "No, get away! Leave me alone!"**

 **0000**

" **Well…that's the guy I just signed up to be in an alliance with," Weavile said, facepalming. "I think I need some better taste."**

 **0000**

"Way to shut him down, Solitaire!" Emolga said, punching Crobat's shoulder. "You broke him before he could get going."

"Hey, I did him a favor," Crobat said, chuckling. "If he was on that stage any longer the judges would've started deducting points."

"Next up we have Mawile, who's going to do a little stand up for us!" Victini said. "This'll be interesting."

"Oh wonderful, a female comedian," Butterfree said, rolling his eyes. "Like a female comic's gonna bring in a lot of laughs."

"That is…sexist as hell, dude," Beedrill said, slapping Butterfree with the blunt side of his stinger.

"Can the truth be sexist?" Butterfree asked.

"Just give her a chance, Jesus," Beedrill said, exasperated.

Mawile walked on stage and flashed a smile. "Okay so, I don't think standup comedy translates very well into writing prose, but I'll do my best, okay?"

This got a few chuckles, and Mawile grinned at that. "Yeah, thanks. So, uh…the way these are supposed to work is I'm supposed to come up with some mundane, relatable situation and exaggerate it to make it funny, but I kind of never wrote anything before the show and I hoped that winging it might work out. Anyone got a topic or something that I could steal?"

The cast snickered at this, and Emolga cupped her hands together to shout, "tell us about your childhood!"

"Any other suggestions?" Mawile said with a polite smile, nodding at the crowd's chuckles.

"Alright, fair enough, I had a pretty normal childhood, except, y'know, my parents' kind of hated each other. You all know how that is, right?

"See, I remember watching these shows, like _Brady Bunch,_ where the mom and dad would be so excited to see each other at the end of the long day?" Mawile said, before she started snickering. "But like, has ANYONE ever had parents that ever talked to each other the way those two did? It's unbelievable. After a long day my dad would complain on hours on end about work, and then hours on end about how cold the food was, and I think the nicest thing I ever heard my mom tell him was he reminded her of Anthony Hopkins. In _Silence of the Lambs."_

She waited for the laughter to die down, before adding: "Granted, the dad in _Brady Bunch_ was gay, so they probably didn't have much of a clue what heterosexual marriages were supposed to be like anyway."

"She's pretty funny huh," Emolga said, nudging Crobat.

"She's good, but I don't think the message gets through too well in story format," Crobat said, shrugging. "Delivery is important."

"Ooh, you're repeating her material!" Emolga said, giggling.

"No, I'm not, shut up!" Crobat snapped.

"So yeah, my childhood was pretty great," Mawile said. "To give context behind my parents, imagine Maleficent marrying Archie Bunker. Not the pretty Angelina Joline version either. Green, creepy, dragon transforming Maleficent. Brrr."

"Maleficent never made much sense to me," Mawile admitted. "The whole curse thing with the pricking a finger on a spinning wheel before the sixteenth birthday. That feels very specific and convoluted. How long do you think it took for her to come up with that plan? Hmm…let's see, should I curse her to be ugly? Nah, not specific enough. No…aha! I got it, Diablo! Prick her finger on a spinning wheel before she turns sixteen. Sixteen specifically. Not when she's younger or anything, I'm willing to dedicate fifteen years of my life in this revenge, because I wasn't invited to a baby shower.

"Alright, running out of time!" Mawile said after the crowd finished laughing. "You've been a great audience, so I think I'll just end with a classic knock knock joke. KNOCK, KNOCK!"

"WHO'S THERE!" Was the collective response.

"INTERRUPTING COW!" Mawile shouted back.

"INTERRUPTING COW WH-"

"MOOOO!" Mawile said. "ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT, THANKS FOR LISTENING, YOU'VE BEEN A LOVELY AUDIENCE!"

The judges clapped hard, wiping away tears of mirth at the absurdity of the joke. The Shuckles and Umbreons were all laughing, and the Umbreons all gave Mawile high fives when she sat down with them.

"Well, that was funny," Victini said. "Too bad readers can't hear the delivery, she'll have a point docked for that. Still, that's seven points!"

"Nice job!" Emolga said, hugging Mawile. "You were hilarious."

"Must've been," Mawile said, downing a bottle of water. "I even caught Solitaire snickering."

"That's it, I'm calling bullshit!" Crobat snapped. "You weren't there when Emolga started using that nickname!"

"Girl code," Mawile and Emolga said, grinning back at him.

"Okay, Mawile's gone, so it's time for Bellosom," Victini said. "Who…has a delicious surprise for us?"

Bellosom walked up and smiled. "Before I begin, I would like the judges to try a bit of the ingredient I plan to use to give the tea taste."

He walked offstage and over to the judges, giving each of them a piece of bitter root. They tasted it and immediately began to choke and complain at its taste.

"Ugh…c'mon man, I can feel my tongue growing numb," Victini moaned.

"Eww….do you have any more?" Phione asked, before Hariyama slapped his neck.

Bellosom merely smiled and went to work, slowly preparing a cup of tea for each of the hosts. "Please be patient. This will only be a few minutes."

This particular talent wasn't very exciting or interesting to watch, but Bellosom's gaze was so focused on what he was doing, and his movements were so precise that some of the more refined contestants couldn't help but be impressed.

"Here, my very special Bitter Root Tea," Bellosom said, placing down the tray on the judge's tray. "Please, enjoy."

Victini shrugged. "More of a coffee person myself, but eh-"

He sipped the tea, and his eyes bugged out. "Whoa, this is delicious!"

Seeing his reaction, Hariyama and Phione drank theirs down too, having the same reaction. Hariyama looked impressed, pleased at the preparation of the drink, having some experience in cooking.

"An important lesson can be taken from this," Bellosom said, smiling. "Even the seemingly grossest of ingredients, when prepared properly, can make something truly beautiful."

"Well, given how DELICIOUS this is, and that slice of truth from Bellosom," Victini said. "I'd say that's worth nine points. What's the score now, Hariyama?"

"Hmm…" Hariyama said. "Umbreons are twenty to Shuckles' eighteen. Close, eh?"

"Yup!" Victini said. "And you guys have one more performance each. Shuckles, because you're losing, we'll allow you to go next as well. Set a bar that the Umbreons need to jump over."

"Uh-oh," Feebas groaned. "I hope Kirlia and Komala can do it. Kirlia was pretty insecure…"

"I'm sure she'll be fine, we just need to have faith in her," Klefki said with a fierce grin. "We all need to be supportive."

 **0000**

" **Deep breaths, Kirlia," Kirlia said, sighing. "There's a lot of pressure on you, but you can handle it."**

 **She looked composed, but a little whimper of fear managed to escape.**

 **0000**

"Why are you so nervous, Kirlia?" Komala asked, pulling on the suit he was supposed to wear for their dance. Kirlia was struggling with the straps of her dress, and her hands were shaking.

"I've always had stage fright," she admitted. "And I'm worried I won't meet my team's expectations. How do you two do it?" She asked, looking at Popplio and Komala. They were the only three left that hadn't shown off their talents.

"Meh, a lot of things don't stress me out, I guess," Komala said. "I just like to eat and sleep, and when it's time for my hobbies I know that, no matter what, when I get home I'll get delicious food and a warm bed."

"Here, let me get that for you," Popplio said with a warm smile, fixing the straps and zipping up the back of her dress. "I've been performing for years, and believe it or not, stage fright gets me too sometimes. All you have to do, no matter what, is put on a confident face and a happy façade. That's how you trick your audience into thinking you're invincible."

He spun around her. "You look gorgeous, honey. Now go rock their socks off!"

"Thanks, you two," Kirlia said with a shy smile. "I feel a lot better."

"Let's go, Kirlia!" Komala said, leading her out by the hand. "My stomach's already getting rumbly for some sweet foods once we finish."

 **0000**

" **Kirlia's normally really sweet and nurturing," Komala said, before a blush appeared on his face. "I guess uh…it's kind of sweet seeing her so vulnerable. I'm not used to people leaning on me, but this is nice."**

 **0000**

The Sucky Shuckles cheered as Kirlia and Komala met them with a bow, and Kirlia couldn't help but feel inspired by their enthusiasm. She let Komala lead her, and soon they were spinning around each other and dancing like professionals.

"Alright, she's awesome!" Absol whooped, clapping hard.

"It's funny how you don't see how skilled you are sometimes," Ariados said with a chuckle. "She's clearly been practicing for years."

"Sure wish I was Komala right now," Weavile said with a goofy grin as Komala spun her around.

Liepard rolled her eyes and cuffed him with her tail.

Crobat was watching the performance when a whisper sounded in his ear. " _Now's your opportunity. She has a key ring around her waist. Get to Klefki."_

Eyes widening, Crobat took to the sky, sneaking up to the steel type, who was

watching the dancers with fascination. Clearing his throat, he mumbled something into the key's ear.

 **0000**

" **We were doing so good, too!" Magmar moaned.**

 **0000**

 **Samurott was groaning, slamming his head into the confessional wall.**

 **0000**

" **At least we all know who's going home tonight," Growlithe said with a chuckle. "But screw you, Crobat!"**

 **0000**

"Ow! Ow!" Klefki stop!" Kirlia shrieked, cowering as Klefki attacked her, turning her dress into shreds. "Why are you doing this?"

"And why did you have to hit my noggin?" Komala moaned. "I don't have much brain to begin with!"

"MUST GET KEYS!" Klefki shrieked in laughter. "ALL KEYS ARE KLEFKI'S!"

"That is enough," Hariyama said, jumping from the judge's table to the stage, blasting Klefki with a fire extinguisher. "You have wrecked challenge."

"Yeah uh, hmm…how to judge this," Victini said, tapping his chin. "The talent was great before Klefki ruined it…in fact you probably would've gotten a full ten points. I'd say Klefki destroying my stage and outfits, and otherwise disrupting this challenge and its players is worth about a subtraction of five points. This puts the Sucky Shuckles at twenty-three points, which means that if the Umbreons get four points or more they win the challenge."

The Sucky Shuckles all glared at Klefki, who was suddenly looking sheepish, while the Umbreons mumbled to themselves, hoping that Popplio knew what he was doing.

 **0000**

" **Not my greatest move, but hey," Klefki said, laughing nervously. "How good could Popplio possibly be?"**

 **0000**

" **There's my response, 'P'!" Crobat said. "Just don't think this means I'm forming an alliance with you. The plan was good, I'll admit it, but there really isn't room for any schemers on this island besides me."**

 **0000**

Unfortunately for the Sucky Shuckles, Popplio's performance was fantastic. He told jokes, juggled, showed successful magic tricks, performed amazing stunts, and even shot himself out of a cannon. It had the judges all buzzing about his skills. They decided that it warranted full marks, and therefore the Unique Umbreons won another challenge.

"You guys all did very well!" Flygon said, raising a glass at their celebratory party. "Popplio, Mawile, Noivern, Heliolisk, and uh…well I guess Castform really didn't contribute, but still! We couldn't have done it without you."

"Two challenges in a row, eh?" Beedrill said, nudging Butterfree as he poured a glass of punch for himself. "We're not doing bad."

"As we should be," Butterfree replied. "Our team is made up of the superior players, so we have no excuses for losing."

"You really need to loosen up," Beedrill said, rolling his eyes. "Actually enjoy yourself for once, Jesus."

"I presume he's still unconscious?" Toucannon said, looking down at the snoozing Castform. "Waking up won't be fun."

"Please," Porygon pleaded. "Do not let him drink anything ever. How his liver has not given up on him is remarkable."

"He probably just made a synthetic one," Toucannon scoffed. "Just make sure he picks up the slack next challenge, or he'll be the first one on our team to go."

"Hey!" Crobat shouted, snickering as he spoke. "Where the hell's my congratulations? I sabotaged the other team and ensured our victory!"

"Actually, that was kind of a dick move," Shellder said. "Not cool at all."

"There's a certain respect you should have for your opponents, and what you did left a bad taste in my mouth," Pawniard grumbled.

"Winning without honor isn't really honor," Toucannon added. "If you truly lack faith in our team you have no right to be a part of it."

"Oh, stop pretending to agree with the rest of the team, Asshole," Crobat snapped. "You're just trying to gain their favor by sucking their dicks. You'd pull the same thing if our roles were reversed."

"I don't like what you're insinuating, Crobat," Toucannon said in a quiet voice. "I'd advise you to choose your next words carefully."

"Yeah, here's my next words," Crobat said, flipping him off. "Not because you disagree with me, but because you're just a shitty brownnose."

"Crobat," Emolga said in a quiet voice. "Why did you do that? I understand you're snarky and a little cynical, but you ruined Kirlia's amazing performance. She was very self-conscious about it and now she's probably feeling terrible."

"I…don't look at me like that," Crobat snapped. "I did what I had to. What, you think you're my fucking conscience? Piss off already."

Emolga gave Crobat a disappointed look and flew off. "I'm going to go find Kirlia."

"Good!" Crobat snapped. "See if I care!"

He looked at Mawile, who was downing a bottle of beer and finishing with a belch. "What, are you going to judge me too?"

"Me?" Mawile snickered. "I don't have morals, keep doing what you're doing, Dude. It's winning us challenges. Drink?"

"Thanks," Crobat said, accepting the bottle and downing its contents. "Sheesh…you'd think you'd get more respect."

 **0000**

" **I don't know what's up with me," Crobat grumbled. "I'm used to people getting mad at my behavior and Emolga just looked…. disappointed. I hate that. Why do I hate it that much?"**

 **He sighed. "Whatever. She's going home soon anyway. Soon she'll be out of my metaphorical hair and I can go back to my miserable life."**

 **0000**

"So, you want me to join your alliance?" Gengar asked. "With Weavile, Liepard, and…. Mimikyu? You have interesting taste, I can't argue that."

"No one would expect it!" Magmar said with a wicked grin. "Look, we control the vote. Kick off all the threats, and you could keep Feebas safe. It's a win/win for all of us."

"Yeah, man, safety in numbers," Weavile said with a shrug. "Magmar's a spaz, Liepard's a bitch, and Mimikyu is a psychopath, but together we're more than the sum of our parts."

"I take offense to that," Liepard drawled over from where she was reading a book.

"I will cut off your feathers in your sleep, Ice-rat," Mimikyu snarled.

"Well, you're right about one thing," Gengar admitted. "I am concerned about Feebas's safety in the competition. Unfortunately, though, that's not a point of weakness you can exploit for me."

"You're bluffing," Magmar chuckled, walking up to the ghost. "You like the stupid fish."

"Of course, I like her," Gengar said. "She's a good and honest person. But on one hand, I have doubts about your competence when it comes to following through in eliminating her or myself, and two…"

A dark expression crossed his face. "Though I indeed like her, I would throw her life in the competition away without hesitation if it came down to her or me."

"Ooh, that gave me chills," Magmar chuckled. "So, you're like me then."

"No," Gengar said, rolling his eyes. "I'm a masterpiece, you're a poor imitation. You wear a mask, Magmar, of the strategist you idolize, and I'm not teaming up with that."

"You're not gonna let him shame me like that, right guys?" Magmar said, looking around at his alliance, who now wouldn't meet his eyes. "Guys?"

"I am however, very fond of making deals," Gengar said, rubbing his hands together with a smile. "To the rest of you, my deal is this. I will join this alliance if you eliminate Magmar, which in all honesty is probably a favor given his incompetence."

Magmar gaped at the ghost. "Wha-buh…I Gah…"

"Of course, probably not today, as the candidate for leaving tonight is inevitable regardless of who you vote for," Gengar said as an afterthought. "Have a nice night, everyone!"

"W-wait," Magmar said, grabbing Gengar's shoulder. "What about me? What deal can we make?"

Gengar thought for a moment. "Disband the alliance. Don't bother me and I'll grant you the same luxury. And get rid of that mask you're wearing. I'm positive you'd be a lot more handsome without it."

He walked off, whistling the tune that Noivern had been playing earlier.

"Sheesh, hurricane Gengar, am I right?" Weavile said, nudging Magmar. "Ah come on man, we'll take him out."

"R-really?" Magmar sniffed. "You'd want to work with me over him?"

"Uh…yeah, sure, let's go with that," Weavile said, rubbing the back of his head. Liepard and Mimikyu shook their heads behind him.

"Ha…then, we'll take care of him!" Magmar shouted, regaining his composure. "Let's boot that stupid ghost off!"

 **0000**

" **Yeahhh….to be honest I kind of like the cut of Gengar's jib," Weavile admitted. "No reason to tell Magmar though."**

 **0000**

 **Magmar smoked a cigarette in the confessional. "It's obvious who's going home tonight." Suddenly his eyes bugged out and he began to cough and wheeze. "Augh, Christ, how does Scrafty make this look so cool!?"**

 **0000**

"Welcome again to Fuzzy Memories of Today!" Tyranitar said, munching on a waffle. "Last time we decided it was Pidgey who put on his best performance, and so he has immunity the next time he's up for elimination."

"You mean _you_ did that," Drifblim drawled. "I didn't want to give it to anybody, but apparently your opinion holds more weight to the producers then mine does."

"Just like in real life!" Tyranitar said. "Seriously, I'm a four hundred-pound dino and you're a balloon filled with hot air."

"Aww, how long did it take for your writers to come up with that bit?" Drifblim said, rolling his eyes.

Tyranitar blinked. "I'm not sure. I can ask them later, if you want?"

"You are impossible," Drifblim snapped. "Anyway, considering the nature of the challenge, it was difficult to pick someone for acting different then they usually do in a talent show environment. In the end, though, we decided on Crobat."

"Oh yeah!" Tyranitar said, clapping his hands. "Dude nails the heckler part perfectly, and he was fun as hell to watch. Good job, Solitaire!"

"Tune in next time," Drifblim grumbled. "Unless Tyranitar's check is bigger again this week. Because then I'm going on strike!"

"Not appropriate to announce during runtime, dude!" Tyranitar said through gritted teeth. "Anyway, have a good night!"

 **0000**

" **I vote for Klefki? I guess?" Liepard said. "Magmar really wanted me to vote for Gengar, but there's really no point."**

 **0000**

 **Komala was sniffling, holding an ice pack to his head. "Klefki."**

 **0000**

" **Klefki sucked today, but we probably would have lost anyway," Kecleon said with a shrug. "I vote Feebas. Sorry girl, but you're pretty useless."**

 **0000**

Victini glanced over the votes, nodding to himself as the Sucky Shuckles sat down in their seats. Magmar looked clammy, Klefki looked nervous but resigned, and most of the other contestants looked bored and a little annoyed at how the game went. The Umbreons, on the other hand, watched from the back seats, with a few notable exceptions.

"Ah, Crobat's gone," Emolga mumbled. "I guess I was a little hard on him."

"Boys are more sensitive than they look," Mawile agreed. "Or he's scheming something."

"Sorry Shuckles, but you're really living up to the 'Sucky' part of your name," Victini said, snickering. "Some of you had very solid performances, looking at you, Bellosom, but it wasn't enough, and as punishment one of you will be leaving tonight."

Victini cleared his throat. "When I call your name, come and get your VIP pass. If your name isn't called, you know what must happen.

"Kirlia, Absol, and Mimikyu. You three are good," Victini announced. "As are Rockruff, Bellosom, and Ariados."

The Pokemon in question smiled and walked up, with Kirlia breathing a sigh of relief.

"Weavile, you're good, and so is Chandelure!" Victini announced. Chandelure blushed a little when he winked at her.

"Liepard, Kecleon, and my man Samurott!" Victini announced, high fiving the samurai as he walked past.

"Growlithe, you and Komala can come up my guys!" Victini said, before scouring the seats. "And that leaves Klefki, Magmar, Feebas, and Gengar."

Feebas gulped and glanced at Gengar, nervous. She and her best friend on the island were in the bottom four?

"Gengar only had one vote against him, so he's safe," Victini said. Gengar smiled his thanks and nodded encouragingly to Feebas, mouthing that it would be okay.

"Magmar, a couple votes this time," Victini said. "Pretty kind, given your utter failure in the challenge."

"Yeah, yeah, shut up!" Magmar snapped. "I'll do better next time, just give me my damn pass!"

"That leaves Klefki and Feebas, eh?" Victini said. "Klefki, you know what you did. Feebas, you can't really do much at all, but is your team holding that against you?"

Klefki closed his eyes tight as Feebas shuddered in her bowl.

"…. Feebas is safe," Victini said at last. "Klefki, my apologies, but you've been eliminated."

"NO!" Pidgey shrieked from the back. "MY DEAREST AND MOST WORTHY FRIEND!"

"More like only friend," Weavile said, snickering, before an annoyed Samurott elbowed him.

"Hey, it's okay man," Klefki said, shrugging and giving the bird a quick hug. "I had this coming."

He turned to the rest of his team. "Look, I deserved to go home tonight. I won't deny that. I have some uncontrollable urges that were exploited. But remember that it was Crobat who sabotaged me. So, while I'm ready to leave, I'm hopeful he gets the justice he deserves as well. Thanks for having me."

He floated off to the Loose-o-sine without another word.

 **0000**

" **I enjoyed my time here," Klefki said with a sad smile. "It's a little bittersweet to leave so early. That being said, my vote is for Pidgey to win. He's an underdog, that's for sure, and he's totally delusional, but he's also fearless and committed, and I find that admirable. People need to treat him more seriously and he could stand to take himself less seriously, and who knows? Maybe a strong competitor could be born."**

 **He sighed. "Honestly though, I'm cool with anyone winning that's not Crobat. Dude screwed me, Kirlia, and Komala over. Not cool, brah."**

 **0000**

"Not going to celebrate with your team?" Ariados asked, raising an eyebrow. "You _are_ an odd one, ahuhuhu."

"Well, I'd much rather spend my time with you," Furret said with a smile. "I brought drinks?"

"Oh my god," Ariados said, gazing at the bottles. "What, are these brand new?"

"Yes, Hariyama just resupplied after Castform's…episode." Furret shuddered at the thought.

"Did I do good?"

"You did _wonderful,"_ Ariados said, popping the cap open. "Marry me. Let's elope."

Furret chuckled, downing his own drink. "So, poetry, eh? That was quite good. Shame it didn't receive more recognition."

"Flattery's a sin, Furret," Ariados said, rolling her eyes. "Remember that there is no physical way for you to get into my panties."

"You wound me!" Furret gasped, mock offended. "The very idea that my compliments aren't genuine only means that you have not been complimented enough. I must make a habit of it."

Ariados giggled. "Okay, okay, I'll accept the compliment, sheesh."

 **0000**

" **He's so…honest," Ariados said with a blush. "It's refreshing. He let me talk about poetry for hours on end. Though, I hardly know anything about him. I feel kind of guilty…"**

 **0000**

"You're saying that there might have been an accomplice?" Komala whispered, looking at Kirlia in shock.

"I'm just saying, I've never even been around Crobat all day," Kirlia said. "How could he have stuck that keyring on? We need to be careful, Komala, because there might be some scary people in this show."

"Huh," Komala said. "So why tell this to me? I'm not very impressive."

Kirlia blushed. "Well, you're approachable and easy to talk to. Sometimes I have a hard time connecting with people, but I feel like I can trust you."

"Oh," Komala said, blinking. "So, you want to form an alliance?"

"Sure," Kirlia said. "Just to make sure all the schemers on this island leave and figure out the truth behind what happened in today's challenge."

"Okay, what's our team name? Team Eucalyptus?" Komala asked.

"Um…. well, I was hoping," Kirlia mumbled. "Maybe something related to-"

"Please, Team Eucalyptus?"

"Alright, alright," Kirlia said, rolling her eyes. "I can't say no to you. Team Eucalyptus it is."

 **0000**

" **Today was very embarrassing for me," Kirlia grumbled. "I'll get to the bottom of what happened, I swear it!"**

 **0000**

" **Wow, I feel like I'm in a spy movie," Komala said excitedly. He turned to some of the makeup artists. "Hey, can you play the theme to Mission Impossible? Thanks so much!"**

 **0000**

Crobat took a last swig of the alcohol, tossing it aside and staring at the cafeteria door. "Moment of truth eh?"

He looked down at the note 'P' had sent him. Right now, he could nail it to the wall, if he wanted to. He had knowledge that no one else did, because he knew who 'P' was, and right now he could share that knowledge with the entire camp.

He hesitated, before turning away. "Nah, I think I'll keep it to myself for now."

He glared at one of the cameras. "Don't think I'm doing you a favor, man. I just want the credit for taking your ass down."

0000

"See it, Gengar?" Feebas asked as she looked around the horror movie set. "Can we leave soon? This place is giving me the creeps."

"In a moment," Gengar said, before he waved Samurott's data file. "I found something of interest."

"Aww, but he's on our team," Feebas said, groaning. "How could we use that knowledge to advantage if he's already our ally?"

"Good point," Gengar said, but he pocketed the file when nobody was looking. "Unfortunately, I can't find the idol anywhere. Sorry to disappoint you, Feebas."

"It's fine," Feebas said with a sigh. "I know I'm leaving soon, considering I was on the chopping block twice in a row. I was just hoping to delay the inevitable, I guess."

"Don't say that," Gengar chided. "I promised I'd keep you safe, didn't I? So, cheer up. You're stronger than you let yourself be, and that's all mental, not physical."

Something caught his eye, and he gazed at it in surprise.

"What's that?" Feebas said excitedly. "The idol?"

"No," Gengar said with a sigh. "Just some dried up blood. Startled me for a moment. You're right, it _is_ unnerving to be in here."

"Right?" Feebas chuckled. "I want out, dude. Let's turn in."

"Just give me a moment to get out bearings," Gengar said, floating a little away, snatching up the data file he had noticed when Feebas wasn't looking. He gazed at the folder in his hand, his fingers clenching on it as he stared at his own face staring back at him from the picture.

"It's a good thing I found you," he murmured, flicking a finger to spark a blue flame. Applying it to the data file, he watched as it lights the package and burn it. "One of my greatest roadblocks in this game has just been terminated.

"Gengar, come on man, it's freezing!" Feebas moaned. "Throw some of that fire my way!"

"Will do," Gengar said chuckling, as the paper finished burning into a crisp. "Just needed to find my foothold, that's all."

0000

 **Another one out in a decent amount of time. Don't get used to these updates though; just got a job that keeps me really busy.**

 **Some cool character interactions and talents being shown, but I feel a little concerned that not everybody's getting enough screen time. Next chapter will have to have more.**

 **Klefki leaves, but I'm sure nobody's surprised. He came from an inside joke that I had with my editor, and while I liked the character for who he was and the role he played, there just isn't enough meat to him to keep him along for very long. Still, I hope you got a few laughs out of him before he had to go.**

 **Next time will be another action-oriented challenge with some twists and turns, so stay tuned! Not sure when I'll get this next chapter out but be ready!**

 **Fun fact about Klefki: He comes from a family who owns a business in making keys and locks. Imagine the torture Klefki got brought on to his family. Like every business in the TPKK series though, it was swept up and bought by Venusaur studios. Who'd a thunk it?**

 **Klefki: Hey, review! You better! I have the keys to your house and I WILL come in here and make you!**


	4. Chapter 4: Pidgey's Anniversary

0000

It was a peaceful morning in the boys' trailer. As the sun slowly began to rise in the sky, Porygon mumbled something about electric sheep in his sleep, Komala had sleep crawled up to Growlithe's bunk and clung tightly to him, and Bellosom's snoring was loud enough to vibrate the entire trailer.

Out of nowhere, Pidgey leaped out of bed, shrieking, "Today is the day!"

"Agh! What the hell, Man," Beedrill groaned, having jumped out of bed and slammed against the bunk above him. The Pokemon whom Pidgey had rudely awoken all cursed and groaned at the tiny bird.

"Gah!" Growlithe yelped, kicking a still sleeping Komala off his bunk. The poor koala hit his hard on the cold floor. "Don't cuddle with me, you creep!"

"Ow!" Komala moaned, rubbing his head. "I hit the same spot that Klefki did the other day!"

"Did we do anything last night!?" Growlithe hissed. "Not that I'm- _did we do something last night?"_

"H-how would I know, I was asleep!" Komala mumbled.

"Haha, Growlithe likes licking koala dick," Weavile snickered, before Growlithe threw a pillow at him.

"So…. against my better judgement, may I ask what's today?" Gengar asked, still rubbing the sleep away from his eyes. "What makes you ruin our morning?"

"It is the day of the third challenge," Pidgey whispered. "The anniversary of my elimination! The day I've marked my calendar for years to come, in which I've spent hours upon hours training to make it past my expiration date!"

"Three episodes?" Rockruff gasped. "After all that boasting you did, you only lasted _three episodes?"_

"What, did you actually take him seriously?" Shellder asked, rolling his eyes.

"Was I not supposed to?" Rockruff asked.

"I must get a good breakfast, so as to sustain myself for the intense day to come!" Pidgey announced, fluttering out of the trailer. "Anyone want to come with?"

"I mean…we may as well, right?" Flygon said, scratching the back of his head.

 **0000**

" **Pidgey's without a doubt the weak link on our team," Sawk grumbled. "I also find him very obnoxious. I'm hoping we lose so we can specifically vote him off third for the second time in a row. The dejected look on his face would be delicious."**

 **0000**

" **It's odd," Porygon said with a curious expression. "I've done scans on him and he seems to have no disabilities. How can someone lack such self-awareness and be a perfectly functional Pokemon with no mental problems? It defies all forms of logic and psychology."**

 **0000**

"No breakfast today, Solitaire?" Emolga asked, flying up behind Crobat, who was heading in a different direction then the mess hall. "You have to keep your strength up!"

"Oh, so you're talking to me now?" Crobat asked, rolling his eyes. "Damn shame. Last couple days have been the most peaceful in my life."

"You were the one avoiding me!" Emolga said indignantly. "What do you even do?"

"Stuff," Crobat said. "What, do you want my whole life story?"

"Yeah!" Emolga giggled.

"It was a rhetorical questi-ah!" Crobat yelped as an invisible force grabbed him and slammed him to a tree. Groaning in pain, he cursed loudly as Kirlia focused her powers, bonking him against trees and coating him in dirt and leaves.

"Haha!" Komala said from next to Kirlia, clapping enthusiastically. "Again, again!"

"Jesus fuck, Woman, what's your problem!?" Crobat yelped at the furious looking Kirlia as she glared into his eyes.

"I want to know if you acted alone when you sicced Klefki on me," Kirlia said, squeezing her psychic grip. "Cooperate and I might not tear off your wings."

"Ow! Ow! ALL RIGHT!" Crobat shouted. "Just ease off!"

"Y'know, I initially wanted you to apologize to her, but somehow this is so much better," Emolga said with a wide grin.

"Right?" Komala said, fist bumping the electric type.

"Yeah, there was another guy," Crobat snapped. "I was going to keep him quiet for now, but I'm not martyring myself for him."

"Wait, really?" Kirlia said, shocked, loosening her grip on the bat, finally giving the poor thing the chance to breathe. "I knew it!"

"What do you want, a medal?" Crobat asked, rolling his eyes. "Look, I got a letter the day of the last challenge that instructed me to sic Klefki on you when the time was right. He must've been the one to stick those keys on you."

Kirlia and Komala glanced at each other in shock, before turning to face the still struggling Crobat. "So, who was it? Who sent the letter?"

"Guy only signed it as 'P'," Crobat said, shrugging. "Gave no more insight as to who he was other than that. His handwriting was messy as hell though, as though his hands weren't suited for it."

"Wait. P…." Komala thought to himself, scratching his head. "Is that like…an initial…"

"Wait a minute…" Kirlia mumbled to herself. "'P'…. _Popplio._ He-he was helping me put on my dress for the challenge! And he's on the other team! It must be him, it fits perfectly!"

"Ay, cool your jets," Crobat drawled. "I thought of him too. Thing is though, 'P' whispered in my ear directly to signal when to send Klefki after you two. How could Popplio do it if he was offstage the whole time?"

"Well, he certainly didn't at any point before it was our turn to perform," Kirlia said, thinking to herself. "Maybe he left while we were performing?"

"And he'd manage that-how?" Crobat asked. "Facing the stage was around thirty people. How could he possibly manage to sneak off and climb all the way up to where I was perched without being spotted?"

"Well, uh…maybe they were so enraptured by our performance?" Komala asked with a sheepish grin.

"Don't flatter yourself, because I assure you I have the eye of a hawk," Crobat snapped. " _I_ would have seen him. So, unless Popplio can teleport, there's no chance it could have been him."

"Well, there are other Pokemon here that start with the letter 'P'," Kirlia said, tapping her chin. "Porygon, Pidgey, Pawniard…and none of them have limbs suited for writing, so that'd explain how messy the letter was."

"Or…Phione," Komala whispered. "That guy's hiding some dark secrets for sure."

"You need to think outside of that box you seem to be trapped in," Crobat said. "Now sit still for a moment, because I'm about to blow your minds. What if the person in question wrote down 'P' to throw people off guard? As in, frame someone else to send someone barking up the wrong tree. The signature is no decisive evidence at all, as the initial 'P' could easily be faked."

"Wow, my mind _is_ blown," Komala whispered.

"How do we know we can trust _you_ then?" Kirlia said with a suspicious glare. "You could be making all of this up as well."

"Fine, I'll show you the letter as proof, all right?" Crobat asked. "Now, can you leave me alone? I feel like invisible knives are digging into my skin."

Kirlia hesitated before dropping him. "Fine. But stay away from me, Crobat. You're dangerous and this game's better off without you. C'mon, Komala."

"Bye, Crobat!" Komala said, waving behind him. "Have a good morning!"

As they stalked off, Crobat moaned, picking himself off the ground. "So, what did you think of all this, Emolga?"

Emolga blinked, before giving a sheepish smile. "Oh, uh…I kinda zoned out there. Not too interested in this whole strategy thing. Did you have fun?"

"…. I hate you Emolga," Crobat groaned. "I hate you so much."

 **0000**

" **Why did I reveal everything to Kirlia?" Crobat asked. "What the fuck else would I have done? She's crazy, and hey, maybe her sniffing around will help me bring down 'P.' Besides, she's a psychic; she coulda' read my mind or something. At least this way she knows I'm telling the truth."**

 **0000**

" **I don't know why I'm so obsessed," Kirlia said, chuckling a little. "Maybe I just wanted a purpose in this game, I don't know."**

 **0000**

Butterfree flew into the game lodge, coined from the game shack the season before. He looked around at the arcade games before facing Toucannon and Sawk, who were sitting down next to a chessboard.

"You wanted to see me?" Butterfree asked, raising an eyebrow. If he were being honest, Toucannon unsettled him, and the leering Sawk with his arms folded didn't make him any more comfortable.

"Relax, Butterfree, I want to speak as friends!" Toucannon said, offering the bug a cigar. "I believe there are many benefits to working together."

"Oh yeah?" Butterfree asked. "And what are you going to do if I say no, garrote me?"

"Flygon," Toucannon said bluntly. "We both have issues with Flygon as a leader, yes? I know I do, and I've seen you question him before."

"I'm listening," Butterfree said. "And yes, I don't particularly agree with his style of leadership. He let Castform perform last challenge without testing his ability. His poor foresight could have cost us the challenge if it weren't for Crobat's sabotage and Popplio's performance."

"I quite agree, and I believe you would be a far more suitable leader in his stead," Toucannon said, nodding respectfully. "With some help, I promise to get you there."

"Yeah, and how could you possibly manage that?" Butterfree asked, rolling his eyes.

"I consider myself a grandmaster," Toucannon explained, waving at the pieces on the chessboard. "An important lesson in chess is to understand the purpose of the pieces. For our team we have the pawns-Shellder, Heliolisk, Furret. The fodder that we can use to our advantage. They're all idiots, scrambling for a better place in the game, and through some subtle convincing we can convince them to turn against Flygon and assure our dominance."

"A coup d'etat, eh?" Butterfree said, nodding to himself. "Still, Flygon's nothing if not charismatic. How can we convince them to agree with us instead of him?"

"Well, you said it yourself," Toucannon said. "He's not fit to be a leader. Time will prove that. We'll spread a whisper of instability in his leadership in secret to them, and the moment he fails, the moment he makes even the most insignificant of slights, we leap on that opportunity. In their paranoia, our pawns will go for his throat."

"You speak like you have experience in this," Butterfree said. "And why would you pick me to be the leader?"

"Well, in my line of work it's important to understand who has initiative and who will fail under pressure," Toucannon said with a shrug. "You're of the former. Hell, I'd offer to lead myself but I fear that I lack your sharp wit."

"Fair enough," Butterfree said, smiling at the flattery. "When Flygon is thrown offstage and we take the reins, I will build up the best team in reality show history."

"And we will watch and be proud," Toucannon said with a bow. "We have a challenge today, so I believe it is time to put the plan into action."

 **0000**

" **Smart people are some of the biggest idiots I've ever met," Toucannon said with a chuckle. "Butterfree is so narcissistic that a few strokes to his ego made him putty in my hands. Ironically, despite his ambition he is still as much a pawn as Klefki was.**

" **My plan will succeed and Butterfree will take the throne," Toucannon continued. "But he'll be nothing more than a puppet. Then, when the teams merge and questions are asked about threats and sabotage, he will be targeted, and I will go free. Controlling the game is as easy as playing mind games on a chessboard. The game already belongs to me."**

 **0000**

" **Toucannon's shady as hell," Butterfree admitted. "But we are of alike minds. I could see this partnership working out quite well for us."**

 **0000**

"So, what's the plan, Absol?" Growlithe asked, raising an eyebrow. The Sucky Shuckles were eating at their table, a little more on edge than usual, given their performance record. "How are we going to get out of this losing streak?"

"Hey, I'm the team captain, not a miracle worker," Absol said with a chuckle. "I'll do my best, I promise that, but y'all gotta do your best too."

"What's your deal, Growlithe?" Rockruff asked, tilting his head to the side. "Why are you always so grumpy all the time?"

"Yeah, do you want some antidepressants?" Kecleon asked, drumming her fingers on the table. "Because I sell them for the low, low price of-"

"I'm just being realistic," Growlithe said, rolling his eyes. "We suck hard, and something needs to change, obviously. Maybe our team leader-"

"You know what, Growlithe?" Absol asked, losing her temper. "Maybe if _you_ had competed in the last challenge instead of being a pussy, we would have gotten more points. Quit trying to point fingers."

This shut Growlithe up, and he looked down awkwardly, the rest of the team applauding her.

"What's wrong, Feebas?" Gengar asked, looking up at the fish. "You aren't eating your food."

"Oh…uh…yeah, not that hungry," Feebas said, shying away from his gaze. "I think I need to talk to Pidgey."

"Why on earth would anyone ever want to talk to Pidgey?" Ariados asked, chuckling, but Feebas gave Gengar a look.

"All right, if you insist," Gengar was a shrug, picking up her fishbowl and walking over to where the tiny bird was sitting alone. He walked off but gave the pair a curious look.

"Uh, hey Pidgey," Feebas said, looking uncomfortable. "How's it going?"

"I am pumping myself up!" Pidgey said, shoving a waffle into his mouth. "I must be prepared for the day ahead, for it is the day I rise once again like a mighty phoenix!"

"Pidgey, how do you do it?" Feebas asked with a sigh. "Y'know, be so chipper and confident in yourself and so fearless despite your body frame? I wish I could be like that, but I doubt myself constantly."

Pidgey gave her an odd look. "Nobody's ever asked me anything like that before. Huh…"

"Well?" Feebas asked.

Pidgey sighed. "It's the opposite, Feebas. I need to have that confidence in myself or I wouldn't be able to function. I'm aware of my species' limitations, but instead of wallowing on my condition I choose to push on and never be deterred. I bite off more than I can chew and swallow it down and ask for a second helping, and that's what makes me so amazing. Not that I'm stronger or better than most people, but because I _can_ be if I keep striving forward. Does that help?"

Feebas gaped at Pidgey. "W-what...? I didn't know you were so-"

"Also, I'm the greatest sword master in the world!" Pidgey squawked. "I am so powerful that the very mountains cower when I meet them face to face!"

 **0000**

" **I didn't know that Pidgey thought that way," Feebas said in a hushed voice. "It's inspiring…. I can't tell if he's a genius or a psycho."**

 **0000**

" **OW! OW!" Pidgey shrieked, cradling a talon. "I stepped on a sword! Mommy!"**

 **0000**

"We're missing breakfast for this meeting," Liepard drawled. "This better be good."

"Shh, food is for the weak!" Magmar shouted. "We need to come up with a plan to eliminate Gengar!"

"Plan? Don't we all just vote for him the next time we lose?" Weavile asked. "Which is pretty inevitable considering how crappy our team is."

"Well yeah but um…" Magmar said, scratching the back of his head. "I was also thinking we need a kickass alliance name."

"Ooh!" Mimikyu cackled. "We shall be the Third Reich!"

"Okay, you need to chill out," Magmar deadpanned. "What, next you'll want us to put whoever we eliminate into-"

"Concentration camps, yes!" Mimikyu shrieked. "That shower they take will be their last…"

"Why did we let Mimikyu in on the alliance again?" Liepard moaned. "She's a raving lunatic."

"Firing squad!" Mimikyu shouted. "Take her down!"

"Mimikyu, where the hell do you think we are?" Weavile asked. "There's no firing squad, and we're not court martialing Liepard."

"Fine…" Mimikyu grumbled.

Magmar stared at Mimikyu, before shaking off his awe and continuing. "Anyway, we'll spread dreadful rumors against Gengar, and soon he'll be kicked off the show!"

"Good, can we go eat, now?" Weavile asked.

"ATTENTION CAMPERS! THE NEXT CHALLENGE WILL BE ANNOUNCED IN THE FILM LOT PARKING AREA!" Victini's magnified voice shouted. "GET YOUR BUTTS DOWN HERE IMMEDIATELY!"

"Son of a bitch," Weavile grumbled. "Maybe I can steal something from Rockruff or Heliolisk…."

 **0000**

" **Is this how alliances are supposed to go?" Liepard asked, raising an eyebrow. "Listen to your incompetent leader's babble and just do whatever you want? Because I'm not really seeing the appeal."**

 **0000**

" **I can't wait to knock that stupid smirk off Gengar's face," Magmar said, clenching a fist. "He thinks he's better than me! NO ONE IS BETTER THAN ME!"**

 **He blushed as a few interns checked on him, looking concerned. "Uh…no…sorry ladies, just talking to myself."**

 **0000**

"Everybody here?" Victini asked, looking over the crowd assembled in front of him. "There's thirty-five of you, so I'm not doing a headcount."

"Our reliable host, everybody!" Mawile said, clapping.

"There are exactly thirty-six people here," Porygon said with a nod. "Including you. Though, mentally, Mimikyu never seems to be present."

Victini glanced at Mimikyu, who was back to scribbling and whispering to herself, before shuddering. "Today we're going on a field trip to the set of last season; Pokkemon Island."

"I heard that Venusaur ended buying the place and turned it into an amusement park," Pawniard said, scratching the back of his head.

"Okay yeah, but I kinda stretched the truth a bit," Victini said with an awkward chuckle. "We'll be using the islands _around_ Pokkemon island, which Venusaur so generously left untouched. You know, the Secret Skerry and Cofagrigus's Cove. I'll explain the challenge when we get to the Secret Skerry, so let's go!"

"Please tell me you're going to teleport us," Shellder pleaded. "That bus trip here was awful."

"Sorry guys, but no teleporting today," Victini said with apologetic shrug. "My doctor told me that too many transitionary devices to push the plot forward is bad for my cholesterol, so we're taking buses instead. Good opportunity to build bonds between your teammates, yeah? You should thank me!"

"Don't hold your breath," Liepard mumbled, glaring at Mimikyu.

0000

"Oh, sweet mother of Mew, someone kill me!" Castform moaned, leaning his head against the window. "There's no salt to an open wound like a bumping vehicle after a day of drinking."

"Well, maybe next time you'll think twice before doing something that stupid again," Emolga said, patting him on the head.

"Seriously though, what are you supposed to be a doctor of?" Mawile asked, raising an eyebrow. "Alcohol poisoning?"

"I told you, I murdered that guy with the Tardis," Castform snapped. "That allows me to usurp his job."

"That's not…how it works at all, Castform," Flygon said, looking horrified. "You don't inherit the title of the people you kill in cold blood!"

Castform rolled his eyes. "You do if you steal their doctorate and tape it to your refrigerator. Besides, wasting time and money to study to get a doctorate is, as I just said, a waste of time. Why sit around and wallow in a classroom listening to an under qualified asshole spout math facts when you could be doing your own delicious science? I earn my doctorate through action, not by waiting around like a dumbass with his dick in his hands."

"O-okay then," Flygon said with a gulp. "I'll uh…leave you be, then."

He flew back to where Pawniard was reading a magazine. "Uh, so if we lose…"

"We take down 'Doctor Strange'?" Pawniard said with a chuckle. "Trust me, I'm in."

"I just…he screws up in challenges and he seems like a straight up liability," Flygon said. "He's definitely the odd one out of the team, and I don't want him dragging us down with him."

A scoff was heard behind him. Flygon and Pawniard looked around at Toucannon, who was giving them an annoyed look.

"Do you have a problem?" Flygon asked, keeping his tone light.

"Well, I'd hope you'd take some responsibility for what happened in yesterday's challenge," Toucannon said. "You were the one that green lit Castform's performance."

"I…. well, Porygon was the one who said that he'd succeed, and that it was high risk, high reward," Flygon said, narrowing his eyes. "I figured that if worst came to worst, we'd have four other teammates pick up his slack. And they did."

"Which wouldn't be the case if Crobat hadn't sabotaged Kirlia and Magmar hadn't failed," Toucannon said coldly. "Your 'figuring' was reliant on far too much luck. No strategy should ever rely on luck, and I fear for our team's future if that is the case."

"Enough," Pawniard snapped, and the toucan looked at him in surprise. "Stop using Castform as an excuse to criticize our leader. When he actually screws up, shit on him all you want, but all you're doing now is antagonizing Flygon for no reason."

"Fine, I'll back off," Toucannon said, shrugging. "Prove me wrong, and we'll never need to bring up this conversation again."

Flygon groaned and put his head in his hands. "I'm not even cut out to be a leader anyway. I came to join this competition to learn from others, not to be the leader. It's as if an intern was expected to be the manager of the company on the first day."

"You're doing fine," Pawniard said, patting him on the shoulder. "And you'll have your chance to prove Toucannon wrong in a few hours. Just hang in there, all right?"

"Okay, okay," Flygon said. "I wonder though…why do you help me out so much?"

"You remind me a lot of the new recruits they sent out on the field," Pawniard said. "Same concerns and look on their face. I like to be the shoulder to lean on. It was the role I provided back then."

"Well, thanks then, Friend," Flygon said with gratitude. "You don't know how much I depend on you."

 **0000**

" **Flygon knows what he's doing," Pawniard said, folding his arms. "His problem is his own insecurity and the hazing that's been going on. I've been helping him through it, but I can't really do that forever. Part of being a good leader is moving past the backlash and becoming sure of oneself. Flygon won't improve if I keep saving him."**

 **0000**

"So, you're another writer," Chandelure said to Ariados, the pair sitting on a bus seat together. "I was wondering if you could lend me some tips. I'm not much of a poet, though."

"Well, I'll admit, I've leaned over your shoulder to check what you've written," Ariados said with a chuckle. "And I think you're wonderful. I love creative writing and what you do strikes a chord with me."

"Aww thanks," Chandelure said, blushing. "I was thinking maybe we could spend some time just writing together."

"That sounds pretty coo-AHH!" Ariados shrieked as Furret poked his head out from under the seat.

"I agree, sounds amazing!" The ferret said, before a spider web enveloped him. "Mmph, mm!"

"Don't do that!" Ariados hissed, looking pale. "What the hell are you even doing here?"

Furret ripped out his paws from the string and made a heart symbol with them.

"Okay, this has gone on far enough," Ariados said, rolling her eyes. She lifted the tied-up ferret and glared at his eyes. "I like you, okay. You're charming and weird and funny. You're also annoying. Stop following me everywhere like a lovesick puppy. Capiche?"

Furret made a thumbs up with his fist. Ariados rolled her eyes and untied him.

"Well, that was fun," Furret said, plopping down between them. "And I am all for the writing idea. Count me in."

"How did you even get here?" Chandelure asked curiously. "You're supposed to be on the other team's bus."

"I'm very stubborn," Furret chuckled.

"Would you stop pacing?" Growlithe snapped, as Rockruff struggled to pick a seat. "We've been driving for twenty minutes, just sit down somewhere, sheesh."

"B-but all the seats look so lovely!" Rockruff said. "What if I'm missing out on something by only picking one? How about I cycle through them every five minutes?"

"God I hate this show," Growlithe muttered. "Look, why don't you go talk to Kecleon? I'm sure she'll sell you something at an absurdly high price."

"But I don't have any money!" Rockruff protested.

"HERE!" Growlithe snapped, tossing the puppy his wallet. "USE ALL OF THE MONEY HERE! JUST GET AWAY FROM ME!"

 **0000**

" **I think Growlithe likes me a lot," Rockruff said with a smile. "I never see him speak with so much emotion with anyone else."**

 **0000**

" **Rockruff's really clingy and annoying, but also super cute and cuddly and it pisses me off so much," Growlithe snapped. "It's like…I hate being around him, but I feel…wrong when he's not around. It's annoying. I hate him!"**

 **0000**

"Car salesmen, eh?" Weavile said, leaning back in his seat. "I knew there was something shady about you."

"Oh, stop," Gengar said with a chuckle. "We're not all that bad, are we? And it's only been this past five years or so."

"Well, that explains the obsession with making deals," Liepard said with a shrug. "What made you join this game, anyway?"

"Well, nothing money wise," Gengar said to himself. "Maybe after all these years I just want to be recognized. I've been alive for a long time, too long, without ever feeling fulfilled. I'm hoping the impact I leave here will offer enough closure for me before I pass on."

"Wait, you wanna DIE!?" Feebas gasped.

"Death for us ghosts aren't really the same as you live beings," Gengar said with a smile. "After all, we're originally from the Spirit World and long to go back there anyway. What keeps us here, in your world, is a lack of satisfaction, a purpose we need to fulfill. In truth, I've grown weary of this world anyway. One can only exist for so long without feeling bored."

"But, all ghosts are like that?" Feebas asked. "All of the ghosts here have some unfinished business that prevents them from moving on?"

"Not all of us," Gengar said, shaking his head. "Many of us were born as ghosts in this world and stay here permanently like Chandelure, while others can pass in between the spirit world and our world with ease. Pokemon like Banette though, or Mimikyu here, are in the same boat as me."

"Yes," Mimikyu said with a nod. "My goal is to subjugate and rule over every Pikachu and Eevee, and create a new empire that puts popular, cutesy Pokemon at the bottom while those who were bullied for their appearance will rule! Alomola and Garbodor are my brethren! Down with societal definitions of beauty!"

"…. Of course, fulfillment is far more feasible in some than others," Gengar said, laughing.

"It's so weird though," Feebas mumbled. "You do whatever you need to and then 'poof', you're gone?"

"Ah, but is it so different from us mortals?" Bellosom asked. "We all have some end goal or purpose we create for ourselves, right? It is why we convince ourselves that life, is worth living."

"Like how I want to evolve?" Feebas asked. "Man, I want to evolve soon."

"Patience," Bellosom said with a kind smile. "You may not have the many years of a ghost type, but you are still very young and open to growth."

 **0000**

" **Bellosom and Gengar are both very kind and wise, and come up with really weird metaphors for stuff," Feebas said. "It's like I'm in Karate Kid, or I'm Luke Skywalker or something. Ooh are they going to train me at some point?"**

 **0000**

"Whoo!" Absol said, sniffing the air of the port the busses had arrived at. "The smell of fish. Not a scent you forget too quick."

"This port is the one that the season one cast set sail from to the Secret Skerry," Victini explained. "You'll be heading there as well, but I probably should explain the challenge first. We're doing a pirate movie! Isn't that exciting!?"

Silence.

"Didn't you guys already do that one?" Rockruff piped up.

"I…well kind of, but in our defense that was a really cool challenge!" Victini shouted. "We would have just done it at the pirate set, but Magmar sleeps there and leaves his dirty laundry, so we didn't really want to do that."

"Wait, are you serious?" Ariados snickered. "I just assumed he and Chandelure were sneaking off together."

"I…. it's not fair! Mawile and Crobat kept pranking me!" Magmar seethed. "They'd stuff things in my bed. I don't even know how they got in our trailer, they don't have our key!"

 **0000**

" **Klefki was a good man," Mawile sniffed sadly as she gave the camera a salute and twirled a key around her other finger. "His last act on the island was to give us all his stolen keys and prank as many people as possible. Magmar was just…. a really easy target so we kept picking on him."**

 **0000**

As Mawile and Crobat high fived and snickered to themselves, Ariados looked confused. "Wait, so…where does Chandelure go every-"

"Moving on!" Victini blushed, his voice going up an octave. "Anyway, in the spirit of pirates, we set up two fake towns at the Secret Skerry. Whichever team raids and pillages it the best wins advantage in the second part of the challenge, which will be held on Cofagrigus's cove. Oh, and the boats you'll be using are at the Secret Skerry, so we'll be teleporting there shortly, as realistic an experience I want this to be."

"Thank goodness," Butterfree said with a relieved sigh. "I can't stand those damnable bus rides. I'm meant to fly, not be cooped up in a tight area and sit still."

"Oh man, we get to be pirates!" Rockruff said, wagging his tail. "C-can I get an eyepatch!?"

"I'll make sure you get one in a minute," Growlithe said darkly.

 **0000**

" **So, we get to spend an hour fucking up a simulated village?" Sawk asked to himself. He gave an evil smile. "Sounds like my type of challenge."**

 **0000**

 **Heliolisk gulped. "I hope I don't get a splinter."**

 **0000**

"Ah, the Secret Skerry," Pidgey said, breathing in the forest air. "As serene as I remember."

"Plant Girl rarely agrees with the delusional bird, but this is an exception," Lilligant said, closing her eyes and placing a hand on the grass around her. "This place is rich with healthy foliage, and my powers will receive an immense boost as a result."

"Y'know, it _is_ pretty exciting to be here," Beedrill admitted. "Where it all began and whatnot?"

"Yeah, this is where Tepig called Zorua a bitch for the first time," Butterfree chuckled. "Memories."

 **0000**

" **Y'know, I never watched season one," Mawile said with a shrug. "I don't get the appeal of this place, really."**

 **0000**

"Are you doing okay, Lilligant?" Popplio asked, looking to the grass type in concern. She was staring ahead, a look of foreboding on her face.

"Plant Girl feels a disturbance in the force," Lilligant muttered. "Venusaur…"

As if on cue, a limousine approached from the newly instated winding road. The window peeled down to reveal the face of Venusaur, famous producer, businessman, and one the richest men in the world. He looked over the members of the Unique Umbreons with a curious look.

"You wouldn't be my men, as they're all doing construction or fired, so…" Venusaur's eyes suddenly shone with realization. "Ah. Competitors on Pokkemon Action aren't you?"

"Whoa, Venusaur in the flesh!" Emolga said. "Are the rumors that you're running for president in Unova true?"

"Well, once I change the law that prevents immigrants from being sworn into office," Venusaur chuckled. "But yes, it's me. Now you all have a story to tell when you return home. I assume you're here for the challenge?"

"Are you here to announce it?" Crobat asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, heavens no, your host can handle that," Venusaur said. "I was just in the area, overlooking construction for VenusaurLand and decided to go a bit out of my way to help with the challenge. I also need to speak words with Victini."

"Er…Lilligant, are you doing okay?" Shellder whispered.

"If we shoved his car into the ocean we could call it an accident," Lilligant muttered back.

"Um…I'm going to stand over here then," Shellder mumbled. "Why are women so scary?"

In the next second, the Sucky Shuckles appeared, but they were all dressed in pirate getup. Rockruff seemed to have gotten his wish, getting an eyepatch, but he had seemed unable to decide which eye to put it over and simply decided to get another to cover his other eye. Everyone was carrying (fake?) cutlasses and Flintlock guns, and Absol was wearing a captain's hat on her head.

"Where did you get those?" Porygon asked. "We weren't apart that long."

"Oh, Kecleon sold it to us!" Feebas said. "A bit expensive, but we thought it was thematically appropriate."

"Why, are you interested in my wares?" Kecleon asked, a greedy look on her face.

"Okay, is everybody here-oh hi boss," Victini said, his voice becoming shrill again. "Didn't know you'd be here."

"Yes, I'm aware of your lack of organizational and planning skills," Venusaur deadpanned. "The two towns are set up a few miles west from here. Do what you need, and don't bother being gentle; the actors I've hired are being paid quite a bit."

"Just don't kill anyone!" Victini joked, chuckling nervously.

"Yes, yes, that would be a bit of paperwork on my end to cover it up, so don't waste my time," Venusaur said, missing the joke completely. "After a few words with Victini here we'll be off."

"Uh, right," Victini said, scratching his head and slipping into the back door of the car. "S-sorry guys, this'll just be a minute."

 **0000**

" **Dude looks like he shat his pants," Weavile snickered. "We all know who calls the shots now!"**

 **0000**

" **I hope Victini will be okay," Chandelure said, a look of concern on her face. "Venusaur never contacts Victini unless it's related to business."**

 **0000**

"H-how's the wife and kids, Venusaur?" Victini asked to make conversation. Venusaur rolled his eyes.

"I don't like small talk, Victini. It cheapens the point of my conversations," Venusaur said. "Oh, and stop shaking, I'm not here to criticize you."

"Oh," Victini said, breathing a sigh of relief. "What is it then, sir?"

"I need you to have Kecleon eliminated today," Venusaur said. "Mess with the votes and throw her off the island first chance you get."

"What!?" Victini gasped. "B-but why!? I can't…."

"She's been selling her unlicensed products on my show after being expressly warned not to," Venusaur snapped. "And you've been casting a blind eye, so I thought it's time to nip this in the bud."

"But that messes with the integrity of the game!" Victini argued. "Keeping Pidgey in is one thing, but deliberately taking contestants out-"

"Victini, do you know why Pokemon like Lilligant and Kecleon joined this game?" Venusaur interrupted. "It has nothing to do with this show or winning it to get the money. They joined your show because I'm behind it. They want to undermine me to challenge my…hmm….what's the word-"

"Authority?" Victini asked.

"That's right, monopoly," Venusaur said, nodding in agreement. "If anyone is betraying the integrity of the game, it's those two, and I could very well get Kecleon arrested for what she's doing."

"Yeah, but…. couldn't we just tell her to stop?" Victini said. "You personally-"

"I'm not giving her the time of day, and you're about as intimidating as a peanut," Venusaur said. "Look, I understand you still have a conscience, and that slows you down, but I'm beginning to see it as open defiance. I hope I'm mistaken?"

"Of-of course you're mistaken, sir!" Victini said. "As you said, this show is all I have. Without it, I am nothing, and you were very generous to allow me to keep it instead of offering it to someone qualified. You also ask for very little in return, only for me to-"

"Do as I say without questions," Venusaur finished. "Ah, so you do listen. Will that be all?"

"That…will be all, Sir," Victini said with a sigh. "Do you want me to teleport you back?"

"No, no, I have a helicopter that will get me where I need to go," Venusaur said. "Don't disappoint me, Victini."

"I won't!" Victini said in what he hoped was an enthusiastic voice, before he opened the car door and walked out to his cast staring at him expectantly. The limousine drove off.

"So, what was that about?" Butterfree asked.

"Nothing," Victini said. "Let's just…let's just get on with the challenge. We'll flip a coin to decide who gets to wreck a village first."

 **0000**

 **Pidgey was vibrating in the confessional. "Yes! A challenge that plays off to** _ **my**_ **strengths. I've held back all my life, waiting for an opportunity to let everything loose. This is that time."**

 **0000**

The first village resembled something straight of a _Pirates of the Caribbean_ movie. It was full of Pokemon dressed up in old fashioned clothes and speaking in old fashioned words, going about their day like they were a couple of centuries in the past.

"Okay, Absol, heads or tails," Victini said.

"Eh, I'll go heads," Absol said with a shrug.

Victini flipped the coin, placing a hand on it on his paw. He lifted the paw up. "It's tails. The Unique Umbreons get to go first."

"Okay, so we just destroy this place?" Flygon asked, raising an eyebrow. "Cause as much damage as possible?"

"In the most pirate way possible," Victini said. "Just no raping and murdering, okay? Knock them out and steal their clothes or whatever, we don't get _that_ into character."

"…. Why are you all looking at me!?" Beedrill snapped as some members of his team threw suspicious glances his way. "That's discrimination!"

"As we said, the winner gets an advantage for the second part of the challenge," Victini explained. "You guys get five minutes to make a game plan beforehand."

"Alright team," Flygon said, gathering them around about twenty feet away from the village. "We're acting like movie pirates, so make sure to be as hammy and destructive as possible."

"Easier said than done," Butterfree drawled. "We don't have any fire users, do we?"

"You have me," Castform said, raising a hand. "I may be a brilliant inventor and chemist, but I'm also the weather Pokemon or whatever."

"Sure, then strike me a fire," Butterfree said with a wicked grin. "When it catches everywhere it'll look impressive as hell."

"The stronger Pokemon should attack the establishments and topple them," Toucannon said. "The quicker should focus on stealing from the residents, and those in between can transition between them."

"Remember though, we're trying to act like pirates," Meowth said, stroking his chin. "We can't make it look very planned or organized or we won't look authentic. We're a mob, not a military force."

"Uh…this is really out of my comfort zone," Shellder said nervously. "I'm not much of a fighter."

"Then stick to shooting water at buildings," Flygon said kindly. "Just…not the ones that have caught fire, obviously."

 **0000**

" **Well, here's our opportunity to make Flygon look weak," Toucannon explained. "His initial leadership fails and makes him look weak, and then Butterfree and I step in with our strategic minds to save the day. Rinse and repeat, and we'll be the ones the rest of the team relies on to call the shots."**

 **0000**

" **I hope this ends up working out," Flygon said, crossing his fingers. "Toucannon will never let me live it down if I fail after he criticized me."**

 **0000**

" **I don't like what Butterfree and Toucannon are doing," Pawniard said, folding his arms. "But from here on out I won't step in. Flygon needs to learn how to fly without being pushed. I think he can handle it."**

 **0000**

The Unique Umbreons charged into the village, shouting battle cries. The townspeople shrieked and ran in the opposite direction, but Lilligant, Furret, Meowth, Crobat, and Emolga overtook them with ease, taking them out with quick attacks.

Castform focused his power, shooting an orb in the sky that brought on a heat wave over the village. His form changed, becoming the shape of a miniature sun. He shot breathes of flame, igniting the villages and spreading everywhere.

Noivern flew above the catching fire and strummed her guitar, playing the theme song to _Pirates of the Caribbean,_ the song amplified by the speakers on her ears.

"Destroy everything that you can!" Flygon said through repeated dragon pulses. "Furret!"

"What?" Furret asked from the bar, where he was flirting with a buxom Gardevoir barmaid.

"Help out!" Butterfree snapped, flapping his wings to unleash a sleep powder.

"Fine, no need to get touchy. Sorry ma'am!" Furret said, rolling his eyes. He picked up the nearest bottle and smashed it over the Gardevoir's head.

"Wow," Victini said, whistling at the destruction. "This is going down even quicker than I thought it would. Time's up, guys!"

The Unique Umbreons panted, the massive carnage taking quite a toll on them. Still, their efforts were well rewarded, as the entire village had been razed to the ground. The team set the alcohol, money, and women's clothing down, enough to make a large pile.

"Great start!" Victini said, clapping his hands. "The next village is a few miles down the road, so let's start heading there now. You ready, Sucky Shuckles?"

The Sucky Shuckles stared in horror at the razed village. How could they possibly compete with that?

 **0000**

" **Damn it, the song Noivern played was a nice touch," Growlithe admitted. "This won't be easy…"**

 **0000**

" **No, I don't take requests," Noivern growled to a couple of interns who were looking pleadingly at her. "Shoo!"**

 **0000**

"So, do we have a plan?" Liepard asked with a look of concern. "The villages are identical, but they basically destroyed the whole thing."

"Hm…." Absol thought to herself. "There's no way we can beat their destructive force, but…"

"...But perhaps technique can triumph over power," Gengar said. "We're supposed to be pirates, not a tactical nuke. If we play the part well, we could win over Victini."

"Well, we already have the tacky outfits on," Ariados said, looking down at her clothes. "Just speak in broken english and look super drunk and we'll be fine."

"I like the pitches," Absol said with a smirk. "We're going style over substance, gang. Remember that?"

"What should I do?" Feebas said. "I'm stuck in a bowl, and all."

"That's for you to figure out," Absol said. "We ready to go!?"

"Yess…kill them all," Mimikyu giggled.

She looked around, noticing her team staring at her in discomfort. "…. What?"

 **0000**

" **I'll admit it, we're struggling," Absol said. "But that doesn't mean that we as a team can't excel. If we think outside the box I know we can find a way to win. I just hope we don't have to say goodbye to anyone today."**

 **0000**

The Shuckles' approach was different then the Unique Umbreons, charging into the village screaming curses and chanting sea shanties. Instead of using their attacks, they fired their flintlocks and slashed with their cutlasses. Even Samurott, normally the graceful and powerful warrior, drunkenly stumbled around, swinging his twin swords awkwardly. Their performance didn't leave destruction in its wake, but it felt very authentic.

Rockruff ran around, belting pirate shanties as he snatched jewelry and alcohol. Even Feebas contributed by tossing around extra weapons to those who needed them. Victini watched them, nodding at their impressive coordination.

"Okay, time's up!" Victini announced. "The winners are the Sucky Shuckles!"

"What?" Toucannon snapped. "But we did far more damage!"

"Yeah, but the Shuckles actually felt like pirates and not like super powered animals. This season is all about acting!" Victini shouted. "Any more stupid questions?"

Toucannon gave the fox a disgusted look but said nothing. Victini floated in front of the campers, handing Absol a map.

"In the second part of the challenge, you'll be taking boats to Cofagrigus's cove," Victini explained. "There is buried treasured hidden there, but only the Shuckles get the map to find it. If the Unique Umbreons want a route to the treasure, they'll have to steal it back."

Meowth inched his paw over to the map, but Victini slapped it away. "For that, the Sucky Shuckles also get a ten-minute head start. No stealing. The first team to bring the treasure chest back to me wins immunity and whatever's inside it. Happy hunting!"

"Wait, Victini!" Kirlia said. "You didn't tell us where the ships are-and he teleported. Damn it."

 **0000**

" **Ugh, that advantage against us is massive," Flygon groaned, slapping himself in the face. "We're screwed."**

 **0000**

" **Gahaha!" Weavile cackled. "This is awesome!"**

 **0000**

' _Dialga's Destiny'_ , the pirate ship that the Sucky Shuckles were situated in, was cruising smoothly across the water. Instead of relying on the complicated riggings and sails to keep with the pirate theme, Victini had a motor installed, and so it wouldn't be long before they reached Cofagrigus's Cove.

"You ever hear the stories?" Chandelure asked, nudging Absol. "Cofagrigus's Cove is supposedly haunted."

"Oh please, you know we ghost Pokemon are harmless," Gengar said, waving her concern away. "Probably a group of Shuppets that like to mess with tourists."

"I'm so excited!" Kecleon squealed, hopping up and down. "What do you think is in the treasure box!? I can't wait to sell what's inside."

Growlithe gave her an odd look. "Where does the obsession with money come, anyway?"

"Money is very important to the Kecleon Clan!" Kecleon exclaimed. "Once a year at our annual family gathering, we compare profits in a competition to determine the best salesman of all of us. If I were to win, I'd be the youngest in my family to do so. That's why I joined this show; to be noticed. Everyone wants to buy things from famous people."

"I hope you get there then," Bellosom said with a smile. "Goals in life are very important, and I think yours is just as legitimate as any other.

"Hey, Komala!" Absol shouted up the crow's nest. "See the Umbreons yet?"

"I see a lot of things," Komala said with a yawn. "A few Wingull, a Whiscash, a ship on the horizon, driftwood…"

"Wait, what was that last one!?" Kecleon shouted.

"Driftwood?"

"No, I mean-"

"Well, there it comes," Magmar said grimly, leaning over the edge. "Looks like the Umbreons are on our tail."

"Dammit," Absol growled. "Samurott and Feebas, dive into the water. I want you to monitor their progress. Samurott, I want you to engage if they try anything, while Feebas comes back to warn us."

"Yes!" Feebas shouted, swimming in a circle around her bowl. "I can be helpful for once!"

Gengar chuckled. "Give them hell, my sweet goldfish."

Samurott dove into the water as Gengar poured out the bowl with Feebas in it. Both Pokemon splashed into the water and swam for the steadily approaching ship.

 **0000**

 **Samurott cracked his neck in the confessional, giving the camera a wink and a grin.**

 **0000**

"It's no use," Porygon said with a sigh and a shake of the head. "We're moving at the same speed. The time interval is far too great for us to have any hope of catching up."

"So, we think of a new plan, Android," Meowth said as he filed his nails. "What can we do that the other team can't?"

"Well, there is something we _do_ have an abundance of," Flygon explained. " _Fliers._ Our boat may not be able to catch up, but we can if we take to the sky…. There's enough of us to hold our own in combat as well."

"There's no need to stay there long, either," Butterfree said, a wicked smile growing on his face. "I have a photographic memory. I can memorize the map and destroy it afterwards."

"Then we have our plan," Toucannon said. "The rest of us keep up at a steady pace. I'll try to destroy their motor. Without it, we can overtake them with ease. As long as we don't screw up the challenge is already ours for the taking."

"Well, if the council of assholes has finished discussing," Crobat said, rolling his eyes, "We'd better get going. The cove is getting closer, not further."

 **0000**

" **I'll admit it, I'm a bit conflicted about Crobat," Toucannon admitted. "Part of me wants his insolent behavior off the island, but on the other hand I know he is no stranger to getting his hands dirty. I** _ **could**_ **use him if I learn the way he negotiates."**

 **0000**

" **I'm so excited!" Pidgey shrieked, jumping up and down. "A sky battle! The perfect opportunity to show off my skill!"**

 **0000**

Feebas gasped with effort as she dove in an out of the water, struggling to keep pace with the _'Dialga's Destiny'._ "They're planning to attack from above! Be ready!"

"Yeah…I think I see," Komala said, gaping from the crow's nest. Crobat, Emolga, Toucannon, Butterfree, Beedrill, Flygon, Pidgey, Noivern, and Castform were all flying towards the pirate ship, vicious expressions on their faces. Meowth was flying on Flygon's back.

"Ready the cannons!" Magmar shouted.

"We don't have any cannons, Dmbass!" Liepard snarled.

"Now, Crobat and Noivern!" Toucannon shouted.

The two bat-like Pokemon smirked and launched attacks. Noivern screeched, sending loud, powerful waves of sound at the deck, while Crobat shook his wings to unleash an air cutter. The two attacks crashed against the deck, shaking it and throwing Pokemon around. Magmar let out a yelp as he tumbled overboard, but Ariados managed to catch him before he hit the water with a string shot.

"We ain't done yet, gang!" Absol snarled, launching a psycho cut that Toucannon twirled to dodge. "Don't let them catch you off guard!"

Chandelure and Growlithe unleashed jets of fire, Weavile shot an ice beam, and Gengar threw shadow balls. The fliers dodged around the attacks, but both Noivern and Emolga were struck, the former spinning out of control and the latter tumbling into the water, letting out zaps of electricity in every direction that electrified the nearby waters.

Flygon descended, slamming a dragon tail into Rockruff that sent the poor canine flying into the crow's nest. The impact sending Komala tumbling overboard, though Kirlia managed to catch him with her mind. Flygon jumped back to dodge a vicious shadow claw from Mimikyu.

"Fools!" Mimikyu snarled, leaping forward. "You will pay for trespassing!"

"Go, Meowth!" Flygon shouted, slamming his tail against Mimikyu's in an explosive collision. "Now's your chance!"

"But of course," Meowth said with a wink, vaulting over both their heads and landing in a roll. He sprinted forward, sidestepping a swipe from Liepard and jumping over a far-off blast of fire from Magmar, before beelining for Absol and throwing a sucker punch at her just as she turned to look at him. As she reeled back he shot out his hand, snatching the map from her grip and landing in a handstand on the boat railing.

"HE HAS THE MAP!" Absol snarled. "GET HIM!"

Growlithe and Gengar both lunged, but Meowth backflipped off the boat. They stopped and stared, but Butterfree caught the cat before he could hit the water. Butterfree smirked and sent out a gust of wind that sent both adversaries tumbling backwards.

"Excellent work, Meowth," Butterfree said. "Let's see what mystery this map holds, eh?"

"Just hurry," Meowth grumbled. "I don't like being this close to water."

0000

"Wow, they're really uh…. causing a lot of explosions, huh," Heliolisk said with a nervous giggle. "Anyone else feel a little…helpless?"

"No point in sticking our necks out if we have no excuse to, eh?" Mawile said, leaning back in a chair, rifling through a cooler.

"Where the hell did we get a cooler from?" Furret asked. "And more importantly, let's keep any alcohol away from Castform."

"I had Meowth nab it for me," Mawile said, pulling out a Capri Sun. "And nah, no booze, unfortunately."

"I've made some sandwiches as well," Pawniard said with a smile. "Though we may as well wait for everyone to get back. A lot of us really can fly, huh?"

"Maybe I should go give them some help?" Popplio asked, looking on in concern as Emolga hit the water with a splash. "I wouldn't be electrocuted, would I?"

"Wait, quiet," Sawk suddenly snapped. The fighting type was so silent that most had forgotten he was there.

"My scanners picked up someone under the water," Porygon said quietly to justify Sawk's reaction. Shellder and Heliolisk glanced at each other nervously.

Samurott burst out of the water, spinning his blades, but Sawk was already moving, landing a roundhouse kick before the sea lion could land a strike on Mawile, who fell out of her chair. Samurott went down hard, hitting the deck before rolling to his feet.

Samurott massaged his jaw, a slow grin playing on his face as he stared Sawk down. Letting out a chuckle, he shot forward towards Sawk, forcing Furret to dive out of their path.

Sawk stepped back, dodging Samurott's razor shell attack, before the water type's wicked horn managed to scratch his side. Grunting in pain, Sawk threw a karate chop in retaliation, but though it scored a direct hit on Samurott's head, the sea lion acted as though he hadn't been affected. Spinning around, Samurott used an aqua tail that sent Sawk flying overboard.

Lilligant sprang into action, throwing an energy ball, but Samurott sliced the attack in half, before Heliolisk mustered the courage to blast him with a thunderbolt. Ignoring the electricity running through his body, Samurott lunged and slammed the poor lizard into Shellder, bowling them both over.

"How can he be unaffected?" Furret shouted in horror. "That attack was super effective!"

"Well, his energy level is dropping, so the attacks are doing _something,"_ Porygon said, narrowing his eyes at Samurott.

"He can block out pain," Lilligant said, performing a quick dance to raise a tornado of petals around her. "Plant Girl saw it in his file. He takes damage like any other Pokemon, but he just ignores it."

Samurott launched at her, swinging down both blades and colliding with Lilligant's petal dance. Lilligant won out, her petals blasting Samurott against the side of the ship, and for once Samurott struggled to get up, his body beginning to fail him. Lilligant now stumbled around, confused.

"Yah, I'm helping!" Mawile shouted, tossing her Capri Sun and smacking Samurott in the face with it. The sea lion lost his balance and tumbled into the water.

"N-now, Heliolisk!" Lilligant ordered as she slammed her head against the steering wheel repeatedly.

"Right!" Heliolisk shouted, throwing a lighting blast into the water, electrifying it. Samurott did not emerge.

"Um…we didn't just kill him, didn't we?" Shellder asked, gulping.

"Oh, come now, this is a lighthearted comedy," Mawile said, waving him off. "We don't have the guts to kill anyone off."

"Wait, didn't Sawk go overboard as well?" Furret asked, scratching his head.

Lilligant blinked. "Oh shit."

 **0000**

 **Sawk was soaked and sparking with electricity. He gave the confessional a mutinous look. "Well, now I know who to add to my hit list."**

 **0000**

The battle between the Shuckles and the flying Umbreons escalated, with the Shuckles aiming ranged attacks and the Umbreons avoiding and throwing attacks of their own. Ariados managed to tie up Pidgey, while Crobat's confuse ray landed a direct hit on Bellosom, sending the poor grass type stumbling around. While Noivern and Toucannon stayed out of range, Beedrill had landed on deck and was exchanging blows with Weavile.

"Heh, not bad," Weavile said, narrowly dodging a stinger as he deflected the other with a claw. "Prison taught you how to fight, eh?"

"I learned a thing or two, yeah," Beedrill growled, spinning and landing a vicious elbow into the ice type's solar plexus before knocking him aside. Before he could move on to his next target though, Kecleon punched him so hard he keeled over, clutching his stomach.

"Agh…h-how strong are you?" Beedrill groaned out.

"The Kecleon clan are the most powerful fighters in the world!" Kecleon shouted, slapping him down with her tongue. "I may not be as strong as the rest of my family, but I could still eat a Registeel for breakfast!"

Flygon cursed at the sight of his teammate falling, before dodging another swipe from Mimikyu. He had managed to take down her disguise, and now she was scrambling forward with her 'head' hanging behind her. Deciding enough was enough, he flew back, grabbing Beedrill on his way out.

Pidgey ripped the webbing off himself with his sword. "Aha! I am victorious-"

He was interrupted by Komala bonking him over the head with his log. Pidgey fell unconscious immediately.

"Whoa, hey, I got one!" Komala said happily.

"In fairness, it's more status quo then an achievement," Castform said with a shrug, floating above the unconscious bird.

Absol readied her claws and pointed her horn at the weather Pokemon as Growlithe and Liepard surrounded him. "You're outnumbered. We're going to knock that ball sack of a body out of the park."

"Oh yeah?" Castform asked, raising an eyebrow. He extended his metal arms, one transforming into a sword and the other into a spinning blade. "Then let's play ball, eh ladies?"

"Hey!" Growlithe shouted, upset.

Chandelure grit her teeth as she unleashed fire blasts and ghostly energy at Crobat, who moved far too quickly for her to hit. The bat never bothered to attack back, but he twirled and dodged, keeping Chandelure away from the slower Toucannon, who moved slowly came up from behind the bat.

"Game over!" Crobat said, sensing the toucan's approach. "Thanks for playing!" He flipped backwards in the air to reveal his body was covering Toucannon's, who shot forward and landed a fully charged beak blast. Chandelure shrieked as she was sent flying but found herself hovering over the water before she could hit it.

"…Huh?" Chandelure said, looking down at the waves under her. "Was that you, Kirlia?"

 **0000**

 **Victini sat in the confessional, whistling and shying his eyes away from the camera.**

 **0000**

With the sky free of Chandelure, Toucannon flew around the ship and struck the motor with his wing, totaling it. Chuckling to himself, he rose up high and watched the two remaining sets of fighters' battle on board the ' _Dialga's Destiny.'_

Castform was fighting Growlithe, Absol, and Liepard with ease, his mechanical limbs a blur as he defended from three fronts. All the while he chuckled and occasionally changed the weather, forcing the three Pokemon to adapt their fighting styles to accommodate. Komala and Rockruff just watched the battle in awe, snacking on a box of popcorn belonging to the Bulbasaur in between them.

Meanwhile, Meowth fought Kirlia, the cat quick enough to avoid the psychic's fairy attacks while she threw up barriers to defend against his dark type moves. They both were weak to each other's moves; it was just a matter of who got hit first.

"Alright!" Butterfree said after closing his eyes. "We don't need this map anymore!" He chuckled, beginning to tear apart the paper.

"NO!" Kirlia shouted, teleporting away from Meowth just as he lunged, causing him to fall off balance. She appeared in front of Butterfree, floating in the air, punching the bug type out and snatching away the map, before throwing up a massive barrier that enveloped her team and bounced back Meowth and Castform.

"I'd say it's time to leave," Toucannon said, snatching up Meowth and flying off, a woozy Butterfree struggling to keep up behind him. Castform begrudgingly dragged Pidgey, who was just beginning to regain consciousness.

In a moment, all traces of the Unique Umbreons were gone.

"Good work, Kirlia," Bellosom said with a bow. "Thanks to you we still have a map, and they have nothing."

"Yeah, close shave," Weavile said, breathing a sigh of relief. Feebas arrived a moment later, dragging a half conscious Samurott on board.

"Well, I'm glad we still have the map," Kirlia said, looking concerned. "But…Butterfree was willing to tear it up. I don't understand…"

"Wait a minute," Absol said, realization dawning on her. "Why have we stopped moving?"

Cursing under his breath, Gengar floated over to the back of the boat. "The bloody motor's been destroyed. The attack was a diversion!"

A moment later, the Umbreon's ship the ' _Regirock's Revenge',_ passed them by, Emolga and Mawile making mocking faces and giggling.

"What the hell do we do!?" Magmar said, panicking. "I'm a fire type. I can't be adrift at sea!"

"We take the dinghies," Absol growled. "Damn it, this challenge just got hell of a lot harder."

"Wait, wait," Kecleon said. "I have an alternative."

 **0000**

" **Man, I know we're losing and all, but it's** _ **so**_ **fun to be a pirate!" Rockruff said, giggling. "Y'arr!"**

 **0000**

"Wow, that forest looks gnarly!" Emolga said, clapping her hands. "I can't wait to get to trekking this thing."

"Well, we have time, now that we've delayed the Shuckles," Flygon said, glancing back at the water. "Ready to lead the way, Butterfree?"

"Certainly," Butterfree said, sounding almost offended. "The fog is annoying, but the path itself is fairly straightforward. Eventually we'll come to a crossroad, in which we take a right."

"Well then, by all means, lead the way," Toucannon said, lighting a cigar.

"I don't get it," Noivern said, raising an eyebrow. "Why bother going through the forest when we have fliers? Wouldn't it be easier if we had a bird's eye view?"

"Afraid not," Porygon piped up. "The fog that surrounds this place is not just for show. It has a ghostly energy around it that's messing with my scanners. It acts as mystical sort of force field that only allows trespassers in _through_ it."

"Why Porygon," Crobat chuckled. "You didn't tell me your technology can cover up plot holes."

Porygon rolled his eyes. "Amusing."

"Uh, guys we better go!" Shellder gulped. The Pokemon turned around to see the enemy ship speeding towards the beach.

"It seems we had less time than I thought," Flygon growled. "Let's go everyone!"

A few minutes later, the ' _Dialga's Destiny'_ collided with the beach. Kecleon, who had been pushing the boat as her feet kicked in the water, cursed at the splinters it had left on her.

"We're behind!" Absol said, stumbling to her feet. "We need to hurry!"

 **0000**

" **We Kecleon undergo intense training from when we are infants, so as to carry our own massive wares with ease," Kecleon said, folding her arms with a grin. "Pushing a boat with my bare hands? Easy."**

 **0000**

"Pathway, eh?" Gengar said, looking down at the map. "Hm….so if we head to the right, it's the quickest way to the treasure."

"Okay, that makes sense," Magmar mumbled. "Can we hurry up, then? This place is really creepy, and I think Mimikyu disappeared."

" _Yes, I have become one with the ghostly forest…."_ Mimikyu cackled. Samurott and Komala shivered.

"You're missing the problem, Magmar," Kirlia said. "The other team has a head start. There's no way we can overtake them and snatch the treasure first at this rate."

"So, what do we do?" Liepard asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Why we do what we spiders do best," Ariados said with a giggle. "Set up a sticky web for our prey to fall into."

"Good idea, Ariados," Gengar said, nodding to himself. "We stay hidden, and on the Umbreon's return trip we ambush them."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Chandelure asked in a nervous voice. "They kicked our butts a half an hour ago."

"Dude, have you seen Kecleon?" Absol said with a wicked grin. "She just pushed a massive boat by herself. Weavile, Samurott, and Ariados are no pushovers, and if worst comes to worst Gengar or I could mega evolve. We have this."

"Still though, suppose they see it coming?" Bellosom admitted. "Remember that this team has beaten us twice already, yes? We can't underestimate them."

"True enough," Gengar said, nodding. "Hm…"

0000

"Yes!" Pidgey said, landing on the massive treasure chest that the Umbreons had dug out of the ground. "We are victorious!"

"Thanks to my tracking skills," Butterfree said with a smug grin. "You're welcome."

"Wow, that treasure chest is really big…" Shellder whispered. "Think of all the money that's inside."

"Oh, you peasants," Meowth said with a pompous chuckle. "Where I'm from this is a mere tip to the waiter."

"Dude, I want to work at a restaurant where you live," Mawile said with wide eyes.

"We'd better get moving," Flygon said, clearing his throat. "The Shuckles weren't too far behind us, and they had the map at the end of our fight."

"Which means we're going to run into them before we hit the beach," Butterfree said, nodding. "Or worse, they've anticipated us getting the chest first and are preparing to ambush us."

"We need to anticipate the latter," Toucannon replied. "In my experience, assuming the enemy is more competent than you is what saves your life."

"So, then, what do we do?" Heliolisk asked nervously.

"Well, we have fliers," Toucannon said to himself, scratching his chin. "I have an idea."

 **0000**

" **Toucannon keeps stealing my thunder," Flygon snapped. "I can tell he keeps doing it on purpose, but he and Butterfree just ignore me when they make plans, and I don't know how to respond to that."**

 **0000**

"Everyone in position?" Absol hissed from behind the tree she was hiding. Ariados nodded next to her.

She closed her eyes. "Oh yeah. This is totally going to be a disaster."

"I can hear them!" Growlithe hissed. "We jump in as soon as the treasure chest is in view!"

A minute later, Shellder, Heliolisk, and Furret came into view, hefting the chest between them. Absol nodded, and she rolled out from behind the tree. With a battle cry, she launched a psycho cut that struck Furret in the chest. Weavile darted forward, moving at speeds faster than they could track, and nailed poor Heliolisk in the stomach. The fire types unleashed jets of fire surrounding the box, separating it from the Pokemon carrying it.

"Now, Samurott, pick it up so we can get out of here!" Absol said, pointing in the direction of the chest with her head. Samurott let out a burst of water to divide the fire, before putting a hand on the chest…

Only for it to flip open and reveal Lilligant inside. "Hello."

Samurott stumbled back as Lilligant's close ranged leaf storm sent him flying, crashing into trees. The Shuckles stared in horror as Lilligant leaped out of the treasure chest, energy balls at the ready.

"Yes, we were quite lucky that Porygon had a 3D printer installed in his software," Meowth said, leaning against a tree. "Perfect bait, yes?"

He jumped for a shocked Absol, using a fake out that caught her off guard, before Beedrill flew from his own hiding place to land a vicious kick on her. Flygon, Pawniard, Noivern, Sawk, Butterfree, Castform, and Crobat lunged forward, engaging the shocked Shuckles and throwing up clouds of smoke.

 **0000**

" **That was the most intense experience of my life," Feebas whispered. "And I wasn't even involved!"**

 **0000**

" **Those at a disadvantage have the most predictable strategies," Butterfree said with a smirk. "At this point I almost have pity for the Shuckles."**

 **0000**

"Ah, as I anticipated," Toucannon said, flying with Pidgey and carrying the genuine treasure chest. "An ambush."

"Yeesh, it looks rough down there," Emolga said, flinching at an explosion. "How much you wanna bet that one was Castform?

"

"I'm so honored you would choose me to defend the true chest!" Pidgey exclaimed. "You must understand my latent power!"

"Not really," Toucannon drawled. "You're more useful out of battle than in, and I needed to sacrifice someone to help me carry the damn thing, and it wasn't going to be Noivern or Butterfree."

"Clever plan," came a new, amused voice. "It's always good to see someone with a brain in these sorts of competitions. It makes my victory that much sweeter."

"Gengar," Toucannon said. "So, you saw through my diversion?"

The ghost type shrugged, a shadow ball in his hand. "You don't give the rest of my team enough credit. I'm merely the volunteer."

"Please," Pidgey snapped. "Like you could take all three of us on."

Gengar's eyes gleamed. "I never said I was the _only_ volunteer. Kirlia!"

"On it!" Kirlia said, teleporting into view, holding Rockruff in front of her with telekinesis. "Open fire!"

"Go back ta Earth, ya scurvy landlubbers!" Rockruff growled, blasting a high velocity stone edge. Emolga and Toucannon were hit, but Pidgey managed to duck behind the treasure chest in time. Emolga groaned and spun down to earth, but Toucannon managed to catch himself in time to launch for the two floating Pokemon.

"Umm…. dude, I'm c-capable of many things, but even I don't have the upper body strength to hold this chest all by myself!" Pidgey moaned, flapping his wings desperately.

"Give me a minute, you damned useless bird!" Toucannon shouted as he slammed Kirlia and Rockruff's heads together, dropping them like stones. He made to fly for the chest but froze when Gengar waved a brown folder tauntingly.

Toucannon's eyes narrowed. "You…that's not…"

"It is," Gengar said with an innocent smile, pointing to the picture of Toucannon taped to the folder. "I suppose you'd like to do something about-"

Toucannon abandoned the chest and slammed into Gengar, crashing them both into the forest. "I will have that back, you miserable ingrate!"

"G-guys, really?" Pidgey moaned.

0000

"How the hell are you able to keep up with me?" Weavile said, stepping back to avoid swipes from Meowth.

"I'm the prince of Persian, fool!" Meowth hissed, parrying Weavile's strike with ease. "My EV's were maxed out before I turned twelve."

Butterfree and Beedrill were a team, moving in perfect tandem, taking turns fighting Ariados, while Sawk traded blows with Samurott. Lilligant was practically dancing as she avoided attacks from Magmar, Chandelure, and Mimikyu with ease.

"Damn it, Absol!" Liepard growled, throwing Noivern to the side. "I know we needed Pokemon for the diversion, but we're getting our asses kicked here! What the hell do we do?"

Absol growled. "There's nothing else for it."

She began to glow with a harsh light, but Pawniard's eyes narrowed at the sight, and he sprinted forward, sliding under Liepard's legs when she tried to stop him. He jabbed Absol in the face, knocking the wind out of her and dissipating the glow. He flipped her over his head to finish her off.

"I may not have seen combat back in the war, but I still learned a thing or two about hand to hand," Pawniard said, cracking his neck.

"Nice one man," Flygon said with a smile, smacking Liepard aside with his tail. "All we needed was momentum on our side. Keep it up, team! Clear a path!"

"There we go," Pawniard said with a small smile as he charged at Komala. "You're getting the hang of it."

 **0000**

" **You may ask why I never bothered to fight," Bellosom said with a chuckle. "Well, sometimes you need to know a lost cause when you see one. Not all of us can lose ourselves in battle; some of us have to pick up the pieces and carry everyone home."**

 **0000**

"Stupid Toucannon, leaving me all by myself," Pidgey grumbled. He dropped on the ground, taking deep breaths. "Aw man…I forgot my inhaler."

"There we go," Kecleon said, cracking her knuckles as she approached the bird, an evil expression on her face. "I'll give you a discount if you step aside."

"Ha!" Pidgey said, pointing his sword at Kecleon's face. "The only discount you'll be getting is when I slice off your head!"

Kecleon blinked. "What."

"HYYYAGH!" Pidgey shouted, launching forward, but Kecleon merely slapped him aside with her tail, sending him crashing against a tree.

"Wow, who would've seen that coming," Kecleon said, rolling her eyes.

 **0000**

" **I am un…stoppable…" Pidgey groaned, stumbling around in the confessional.**

 **0000**

Toucannon landed a series of blows on Gengar, before throwing him against a tree, pinning the ghost against him as he began to slide down it.

"Ooh," Gengar grunted, chuckling as Toucannon's talons dug into his ghostly body. "I can tell I touched a nerve."

"You have one chance to hand the folder over to me," Toucannon growled, his beak beginning to glow.

"Unfortunately, I cannot do that," Gengar said, snapping his finger. A purple outline appeared over his body. Toucannon backed off immediately.

"Ah, so you recognize the move Destiny Bond," Gengar said, grinning. "You never fail to exceed my expectations."

"I don't need to touch you to destroy you, Gengar," Toucannon snarled. "I have friends in high places, and you'll vanish from the face of the earth so fast- "

"All I need to do is show people the folder, and you're ruined," Gengar said. "Enough of these paltry ultimatums, I'd like to parlay with you instead. Deal making is far more to my taste than this foolish dick measuring contest."

"I'm listening," Toucannon said, lighting a cigar.

"I know what kind of man you are, Toucannon," Gengar said, nodding. "You have very big aspirations for your team, and I won't get in the way of that. In fact, I'd find it very fun to watch. I won't speak a word about what I read in your folder, and I'll make sure no one even lays their eyes on its contents. This was a blessing for you, not a curse."

"And in return?" Toucannon asked.

o

"I make a list of Pokemon you will not target before the merge hits," Gengar said, his eyes drilling into Toucannon's. "I know how much influence you have, so if any of these Pokemon fail to make it to the merge, I'll consider it a betrayal of my trust."

"Oh yeah?" Toucannon asked, raising an eyebrow. "And why do you want certain people in over others?"

"A condition of our deal is that you ask no more questions regarding my motives," Gengar said, folding his arms. "Fair enough?"

Toucannon hesitated. "Is Flygon on this list? Or his friend Pawniard?"

"No, they are not," Gengar said. "Do what them what you will."

"Very well then," Toucannon said, releasing his grip on Gengar. He held out his wing and Gengar shook it enthusiastically. "You have yourself a deal."

"Pleasure doing business with you, my friend," Gengar said, bowing. "Good luck with the rest of the challenge."

 **0000**

 **Toucannon looked uncomfortable. "He'll need to go. It's like he could see through me. I don't like it when people think they understand me."**

 **0000**

Meowth jumped at Kecleon, but the chameleon caught the cat and threw him into Lilligant and bowled them both over. She chuckled as Sawk aimed a kick at her, ducking and wrapping around a tongue around his leg. Spinning around, she threw him against a tree.

"We may have a problem here," Flygon snapped. "Butterfree, Beedrill. Can you two take him?"

"Yeah, last time we 'fought', she broke a few ribs," Beedrill said, scratching the back of his head with a stinger. "Gonna take a rain check on that."

"Pidgey, sneak attack style!" Pidgey shrieked, swinging his sword at Kecleon's neck. Kecleon rolled her eyes and headbutted him so hard his eyes rolled back in his head.

"I don't understand it," Butterfree said, as Castform, now in his ice form, launched special attacks that Kecleon was forced to dodge. "Why does that bird even try? How can someone lack such self-awareness?"

"You're misunderstanding him," Bellosom said, shaking his head as Pidgey rose to his feet, only to fall again as Kecleon kicked him into the dirt. "He's more aware of his problems than anyone else possibly could be. That mindset of his…it's what he uses to push himself back to his feet time and time again. If his body didn't fail him time and time again…he'd be a real fighter."

"Alright, screw all of this," Castform said. "Porygon, I need you to execute protocol XXX."

Porygon's eyes went wide. "You can't be serious! The opposite reaction would be catastrophic! The moon's existence in the solar system is essential for our planet and species' survival!"

"I don't give a shit," Castform said, putting sunglasses on. "I'm motherfucking Doctor Castform. I don't give a shit about anything."

"N-no need!" Pidgey said, rising to his feet again. "I'll take her down and we'll win this challenge once and for all! Believe it!"

"Okay, no Naruto references!" Kecleon snapped, snatching the bird around the waist. "Unless you're willing to buy Shippuden on Pikabluray?"

"Oh, Dude, sure!" Pidgey said. "But first, I'm going to kick your-agh!"

"You should just stop trying honestly," Kecleon said, squeezing the tiny bird in her grip. "I admire your dedication, but just find a job more suited to your skillset! Because this, this is pretty pathetic."

"A-a true Shonen protagonist…n-never gives up-" Pidgey managed to squeak out. "I'll fight to m-my last-grk!"

"So you want your body to break before your will then?" Kecleon said, rolling her eyes. "Did you take out a life insurance policy?"

"N-no."

"Then I have no problem with that!" Kecleon tightening her grip. Pidgey let out a choked squawk, turning blue…

Until suddenly the everstone popped out of his mouth and bounced off Kecleon's face, causing the chameleon's grip to loosen. Pidgey grinned. "Haha!"

He brought his head back, headbutting Kecleon as he began to glow in a bright light. The sudden impact sent Kecleon reeling, while Pidgey grew steadily into a much bigger Pokemon.

"Finally!" A newly evolved Pidgeotto crowed. "My potential has come at last!"

"Holy shit," Butterfree said. "Can he actually pull something off?"

Pidgeotto flew forward with a screech, but Kecleon merely shrugged and punted him away.

"…. Oh," Butterfree said.

"What, were you surprised?" Mawile chuckled.

"Okay, now that he's _finally_ finished," Kecleon said. "Who wants to go next!"

Kecleon stepped forward, but something brown slammed into her, forcing her to land in a roll. A Pidgeot stepped in between them grinning in triumph.

"Wait, did you evolve _twice?"_ Butterfree asked.

"Yeah man, I was like, really high leveled," Pidgeot said, smirking. "That everstone in my gut really was holding me back. Give me a minute guys!"

"Okay, no," Kecleon growled. "I'm not losing to _Pidgey,_ of all people-"

Pidgeot shot forward, snatching Kecleon up by her talons. "Go get this chest back home, team! I'll deal with this vile witch on my own!"

"Hey! Rude!" Kecleon screeched as Pidgeot took to the sky with her in tow. "Put me down! Hey!"

"I think…Pidgey just won a challenge for us," Beedrill said, gaping.

"Well, we're not looking a gift Rapidash in the mouth, are we?" Flygon said. "You're not going to hold us back, are you Bellosom?"

"Oh of course not," Bellosom said, chuckling. "Go on ahead. I'm a little worried some of these guys are going to bleed out."

 **0000**

" **I'm never going to live this down," Kecleon moaned.**

 **0000**

"Well, thanks to…. Pidgey, of all people, the Unique Umbreons managed to win the challenge?" Victini said, still looking shocked. "W-wow."

"Well, what's in the chest?" Meowth said, eying it greedily.

"Hey, I thought you weren't interested!" Shellder accused.

"Well, check inside!" Victini said, flicking open the chest. Inside was…

"Special edition DVDs of Total Pokkemon Island!" Victini said, tossing one to a bemused Popplio.

"Wait…that's it?" Flygon asked.

"YES!" Pidgeot cheered. "Now I can watch myself kick ass on the big screen!"

"No fair, I want one!" Magmar whined.

"Too bad," Victini said, looking over the disappointed faces of the Unique Umbreons. "Well, Shuckles, who have lost _again,_ the elimination ceremony is thirty minutes, so hurry up and decide who you want to leave this place. Have fun!"

 **0000**

" **Three challenges and we haven't lost a single team member!" Emolga cheered. "We're doing awesome!"**

 **0000**

" **I wonder who they'll vote off," Furret said, thinking to himself. "Hopefully none of the women. I couldn't bear to see one of the beauties leave so quickly."**

 **0000**

"What's going on?" Kirlia asked, walking up to the mess hall. A letter was stapled to the door, and a pile of Sucky Shuckles were gathered around it.

"So, 'P' decided to make himself public, eh?" Crobat said, letting out a low whistle. "Just what are his intentions?"

"Wait….'P'!" Kirlia gasped, before pushing her way forward and reading the letter:

 _Dear Sucky Shuckles,_

 _My fellow competitors, I would be ever so grateful if you vote off Kecleon at tonight's elimination ceremony. She's a massive physical threat, plain and simple, and she nearly wiped out our entire team._

 _There's no catch to this request, and it is nothing more than a request, though I won't take too kindly if you say no. I have ways of knowing who voted for whom, and if I find out you failed to follow through with my request a letter requesting to target YOU may be stapled to the door. Just some food for thought._

 _Your memorable friend,_

 _P~_

"Th-that's him again!" Kirlia gasped. "He was the one who told Crobat to sabotage me!"

"Wait, are you serious?" Weavile gasped. "Damn it, this guy is controlling the whole game!"

"Well, we're not going to listen to him, right?" Kecleon said, laughing nervously. "There's no way he could back up his threat."

"Not physically, no," Gengar admitted. "But there is a fear of the unknown. I'm sorry Kecleon, but you may be in danger."

The other members of her team, Growlithe, Absol, even Chandelure and Feebas wouldn't meet her eyes. Kecleon looked between them desperately.

"Well, I for one won't stand for P's behavior, after what he did to me!" Kirlia said. She glared at Crobat. "Not that you weren't just as much to blame."

Crobat grinned, showing off his white teeth. "Hey, I never tried to push the blame away. Please continue your speech though, Princess."

"I'm not voting for Kecleon," Kirlia announced. "Neither will Komala! R-right?"

"Huh?" a dazed out Komala said, before blinking back his focus. "Oh uh…yeah. Sure."

"I will not vote for Kecleon as well," Bellosom said with his easy smile. "Winning was never much of a concern of mine to begin with."

"Aw….th-thanks you guys," Kecleon said, sniffling. "You get a hug, free of charge."

0000

"Welcome to another episode of Fuzzy Memories of Today: a side show for Pokkemon Action or whatever," Drifblim said, rolling his eyes.

"Aww c'mon man, put a little more effort into this!" Tyranitar pleaded. "This is why they picked me to be the host! I have so much unbridled charisma."

"More like unbridled schizophrenia," Drifblim grunted. "Anyway, our pick to win the drama portion of the challenge was Rockruff. The guy really got into the whole pirate thing, with the two eyepatches and all."

"I don't like him," Tyranitar growled.

"You don't like anyone in that species line, you racist," Drifblim accused. "Not even that poor, loveable Lycanroc in that other show. Hell, you _laughed_ when he broke his jaw!"

"I did not laugh!" Tyranitar protested. "I just cry odder than most!"

"Well, that's our segment," Drifblim said. "Enjoy your immunity, Rockruff!"

"Wow man was that an exclamation point at the end there?" Tyranitar asked. "Good for you."

"Screw off…"

 **0000**

" **Of course, Rockruff** _ **would**_ **be immune," Growlithe muttered. "I'll cave and just vote Kecleon like everyone else."**

 **0000**

" **It's such a shame," Feebas said sadly. "She would have been such a good competitor."**

 **0000**

" **It's not over yet," Kecleon said, a determined expression on her face. "All roads lead to the gift shop, and I'm not ready to grab a shopping cart."**

 **0000**

"First pass goes to Rockruff of course," Victini said with a smile, chuckling as Rockruff bounded up to snatch it. "Good job on that immunity my dude."

He looked down at the campers with a feigned grin. Why did he have to be such a coward? "Also safe are Gengar, Ariados, Growlithe, Kirlia, Bellosom, Weavile, Liepard, Magmar, Samurott, and Chandelure. None of you got any votes."

Kecleon flinched as a huge chuck of castmates walked up to claim their VIP passes. This was bad. She glanced at the remaining Pokemon that hadn't been called. Komala seemed very uninterested, Mimikyu was glaring at the crowd of safe Pokemon, as if accusing them of voting for her, and Feebas simply sighed, accepting the status quo.

"Absol, get up here," Victini said with a grin. "They aren't getting rid of their leader just yet."

"I knew I'd be safe!" Absol said, but the relieved look on her face revealed otherwise. "And thanks for giving me another chance. I won't waste it."

Victini looked over the few remaining competitors. "Mimikyu and Komala, you are also safe. No votes surprisingly. They were all reserved for these last two here."

A nervous Feebas and Kecleon glanced at each other as the other two walked on stage. Feebas gulped, while Kecleon closed her eyes and crossed her fingers.

"The final VIP pass of the night goes to…" Victini finally looked at the results of the votes and let a massive sigh of relief.

"…Feebas."

Kecleon groaned, flopping down in her seat with a defeated groan as Feebas whispered a praise to Arceus. Gengar similarly sighed in relief, causing Weavile to grin and punch him in the arm.

"Sorry Kecleon," Victini said, shaking his head. "It's time for you to leave. Pack your bags and go to the Loose-O-Sine. The rest of you are safe. For now."

As a dejected Kecleon walked off, a concerned Chandelure stared at Victini. It wasn't something someone could easily catch, but…was that _guilt_ on his face?

 **0000**

" **I need to talk to him tonight," Chandelure murmured. "He was talking to Venusaur again today. Uh-oh."**

 **0000**

" **Wow, what a bunch of sellouts!" Kecleon shouted. "Stupid writer of a stupid letter that got everyone stupidly paranoid."**

 **She sighed, regaining her composure. "Those of you who stood by me; Kirlia, Bellosom, and I guess Komala? You get my vote. The rest of you can screw off.**

" **Well, I'm going to see what I can nab of Victini's stuff before selling it for ridiculously high prices!" Kecleon said, clapping her hands. "Nothing like getting over a bad mood then people freaking out over a celebrity's personal items!"**

 **0000**

"

You are so cool, now!" Feebas whispered, looking over Pidgeot's new body. "All evolved and powerful. I hope I can be like you one day!"

"That's the secret of the Pidgey, Feebas," Pidgeot said with a wink. "Everyone can be like me if they try. There's no monopoly on my badassery."

"Interesting philosophy, Pidgeot," Gengar chuckled. "And of course, you'll evolve and be like him, Feebas. Even greater than he is."

"Really?" Feebas whispered, her eyes widening.

"Well, let's not get too hasty-" Pidgeot said.

"Really," Gengar said with a kind smile. "I told you. If you're in need of my help I will give it to you, and I know you have the potential."

0000

"You're shitting me, right?" Beedrill asked Butterfree. The two were currently in one to the many artificial forests located at the film set. Instead of going to sleep with the rest of their teammates, Butterfree dragged Beedrill to this secluded area just to tell him about the alliance he made with Sawk and Toucannon. "Even Rockruff can tell that guy's up to no good."

"That's because he isn't," Butterfree replied, only confusing his brother even more.

"So then why the hell are you working with them?"

"…It's all part of my plan. I know a way to dominate this game, and it involves me working with them," Butterfree said, rolling his eyes. Somehow he knew his brother would react like this.

"The fuck's your 'grand plan' this time?" Beedrill said, folding his arms.

'Don't want to spoil the surprise," Butterfree said with a confident grin. "It involves me leading this team and you staying as far from the radar as possible. No mega evolving.

"No surprise there, though I personally think you should give him a chance. He's a good guy…"

"Yeah, not going to happen," Butterfree deadpanned. "Flygon's weak, and that hinders our team. The quicker he's out, the higher chance we have at avoiding elimination, even after the merge. With him gone, there's absolutely no way the both of us can possibly lose. Look, I'd ask you to trust me, but I already know you do, so instead, I'll just ask you not to fuck up. Think you can do that for me?"

"I hate it when you decide to keep secrets from me," Beedrill groaned. "And I don't see the logic behind nearly anything you do, but you're right, I do trust you, even though you can be an asshole sometimes."

"Good," Butterfree said with a smile, before looking at the now dark sky. 'Everything's been set in motion. Now all I have to do is wait…'

 **0000**

" **He's not a bad guy," Beedrill admitted. "All he does is for me and our parents, and it's been that way since we were kids. But this ambition he has, it's scary. We grew up in an environment where we were told we couldn't be anyone we wanted to be, and Butterfree took great exception to that. But to what lengths he'll go to for success….I'm a little scared of him, if we're being honest."**

 **0000**

Chandelure whistled as she made her way to Victini's cabin, looking both ways to see if anyone was watching her. She knocked on the door, throwing an anxious look over her shoulder.

Hariyama opened the door, folding his arms when he looked at her. Chandelure went bright red.

"Oh, jeez I'm sorry," She whispered. "I um…I just wanted to check on V-Victini and I didn't know you'd be around…"

"It is fine," Hariyama chuckled. "Hariyama is no fool, he can see what happens between you and young Victini. But Victini is not feeling well. Not wise for you to visit when he is…. vulnerable."

"B-but that's why I came!" Chandelure said. "I know he talked to Venusaur and I just wanted to talk to him about it."

"Let her in, Hariyama," Victini said. "Take the rest of the night off as well."

"If Victini insists," Hariyama said with a bow. He walked down the cabin steps and squeezed Chandelure's shoulder. "You are good for him. He opens up to very few."

He walked off, whistling, as Chandelure flew through the door to see Victini wrapped up in blankets, groaning to himself.

Chandelure closed the door to the cabin. "What happened today, Victini?"

"I…for the first time, I was told to purposely go out of my way to eliminate a contestant," Victini said. "And it's not like I could disobey him. I'd be fired so fast if I didn't obey his wishes….and then where would I be?"

"Did you…were you the reason Kecleon left?" Chandelure said, afraid of the answer.

"…No," Victini said. "You guys saved me from making the wrong choice by voting for her…. but…I would have…I _know_ I would have…and that knowledge is killing me."

"I don't think you would have," Chandelure said. "I think you're making yourself guilty for no reason."

"Well, I'm not reporting anything about Venusaur, even though I know how corrupt he is," Victini mumbled. "I hate what I got myself into, but I can't dig myself out of it."

"You will," Chandelure said, grabbing his hand. "In your own, Victini way. I don't need to give you some speech to change you, because you don't need to. All you need is time, and I know you'll do the right thing."

"Well, yeah maybe…but I don't know that," Victini said with a sigh. "I can't tell if I'll ever do the right thing."

"The fact that you're so beat up about it is what convinced me," Chandelure said. "Now…try to forget about it for a while, okay? Let me ease your pain, just a little."

Victini pulled Chandelure into a hug. "Is this okay, Chandelure? I-I don't want you to get in trouble."

"I know you'll protect me, Victini," Chandelure said, snuggling into his chest. "And if we do get caught, it'd be worth it."

They just sat like that for a time, until Chandelure slowly began to drift off. Victini decided not to wake her, opting to allow her to use him as a pillow instead.

"I like this a lot Chandelure. I just…. I don't want to drag you down with me. You don't deserve that. You deserve better than any of this."

He looked down at her. "I should be able to say no to you, Chandelure. And that's what makes me so shitty."

0000

This one should've been out sooner, sorry guys. I was on vacation for about a week.

I enjoyed this chapter quite a lot, because there's so much at play. This one didn't have a specific focus necessarily, instead allowing all the characters (including some of the less focused ones) get some nice character interactions.

Then we have the elephant in the room. Pidgey, who finally pushed himself out of a 'one trick pony joke character' and came into his own this time around. Whether you thought it was awesome or poorly handled, he'll be a lot more dynamic as a character from now on, at least for as far as he makes it.

As for Kecleon, she was a little redundant, considering I did the PMD Kecleon joke last season, but I'm happy with where she went. Also, she's gonna kick ass in that upcoming tournament, so we'll see if anyone can stand up to her. I'm a lot prouder of the early eliminations this season then last, because all of their roles in the story have had plot significance and they all have at least one memorable quality despite only being in a few chapters. Much better then the early ones last time around (looking at you Pidgey, and you, Electivire.)

For now, though bye, and I hope to see you with the next chapter up soon!

Kecleon: Review, please! I won't even make you pay to do it!


End file.
